55 votes
Accepted

How to help a bullied child (without involving parents or teachers)

I have been the bullied child. What my parents tried to teach me was being able to stand up for myself. Trusting in my self-worth and independence. A parent can help with the first steps on this way, ...
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  • 1,436
43 votes

How to nurture my child to be fearless

It seems to me that being shouted at is likely to make any child cry, particularly by an older child. Shouting is not nice, and intimidating particularly from an older child. Door knocking i've not ...
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  • 58.3k
37 votes
Accepted

How much should you buy for your child to keep up with their peers?

Like the others, I disagree that you should buying your child "everything". But I feel there is an important distinction other answers don't bring to the point, although some skirt it. When your ...
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  • 1,362
33 votes

How much should you buy for your child to keep up with their peers?

When confronted with these issues for the first time, we asked ourselves these questions: Can we afford to have everything all our peers have? If not, when and how did we learn to not to let this ...
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  • 2,846
32 votes

How can I deal with stealing at school (by other kids)?

I'm sorry for what you're going through; bullying is terribly distressing and something that can make you feel really helpless as a parent. Helpless, because it's an acute problem with no quick fixes. ...
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  • 10.6k
31 votes

How to help my son to be himself?

This really resonated with me. From my own experience, and speaking as someone who danced ballet for a number of years (in point shoes), wore girlish clothes and make up, etc... –– it's impossible to ...
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22 votes

How can I deal with stealing at school (by other kids)?

If he doesn't listen break his nose and forget about the toy Yes, this would be a wrong thing for several reasons, not least the cost/benefit of "playing with a toy" at the age of five vs "eventual ...
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  • 10.2k
18 votes

How to nurture my child to be fearless

Being brave is not the absence of fear, it is doing the right thing even though you are afraid. Fear is good, it is based off of natural preservation instincts and can warn of danger. You need to ...
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  • 317
17 votes

How much should you buy for your child to keep up with their peers?

I think that money is not the most important factor here. I think that the reason the children usually have these costly toys (and I mean toys, since most kids do little more than play on them) like ...
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  • 9,951
16 votes

Grandson is 7 he uses his Karate on his 3 yr old sister. Is 3 yr old too young for self-defense?

As Ian MacDonald said in the comments, your grandson should be disciplined. He needs to understand that hitting people is wrong (except in self defence). Having your granddaughter learn some karate ...
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  • 9,338
12 votes

How much should you buy for your child to keep up with their peers?

When I first read this question, the first word that came to my mind was bullying. You're in a kind of "damned if you do, damned if you don't" position here, and you need to choose 1) what's really ...
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  • 66.9k
12 votes
Accepted

Boy defending himself from sister, or fight back?

Of course he should defend himself. some boys are stronger than girls, some boys are stronger than other boys, none of that negates your right to defend yourself. He is being bullied and instead of ...
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  • 3,143
11 votes

How to deal with kids that bully my kids?

If you have talked with the principal, then: Write a letter to the principal mentioning that you talked to him or her but you were not satisfied, and copy the teacher, the School Board and the ...
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  • 17.4k
10 votes

Boy defending himself from sister, or fight back?

The girl needs more firm supervision and training, because other kids will not be so tolerant and will deal with it in a "natural" manner when adults aren't looking. If she can't behave around other ...
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  • 3,637
10 votes

How can I deal with stealing at school (by other kids)?

I have no kids, however I can tell you what worked for me as a bullied teenager, and may be useful for others. I live in Mexico, where bullying is present from kinder garden to, sometimes, high school:...
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  • 101
9 votes

How to nurture my child to be fearless

Fearlessness is basically stupidity. You can be fearless only if you are stupid enough not to be able to realize the consequences of a serious action or danger. Strength is doing what needs to be ...
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  • 199
9 votes

Autistic child constantly mobbed by other children - what can be done?

Talk to the school. They should have an anti-bullying policy. Get it and insist that they apply it in this case. Write to the teachers. Identify the specific hurtful behaviours being used and insist ...
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  • 9,338
9 votes

How do I help my son deal with a sexually abusive bully in preschool?

This has to be one of the most painful parts of parenting. It's good that the teachers are contacting you**; having Cain's parents sit in, though, while very important for Cain and his parents, is ...
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  • 66.9k
9 votes
Accepted

My child spit water in another kid's face - now what?

Ah, the heartbreak of parenthood (I'm serious.) You have asked what you can do. You say your son offered a half-hearted apology. If you want him to learn why his behavior hurts others as well as ...
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  • 66.9k
9 votes

How to help my 6-year-old son, who is being bullied by my roomate's 20-year-old son?

This is child abuse by an adult, plain and simple. Assuming you can't get out immediately, you should make your point of view clear to your room mate and/or his son. Tell them that if the abuse ...
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  • 9,338
8 votes

How to help my son to be himself?

I would teach my son "mean people are mean and that isn't because of anything about you". My son has long hair. He was about 2 when he asked me why he has to cut his hair and I don't. I had no good ...
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  • 7,310
8 votes

4 year old being hit in school

I want to give you as full an answer as I can. My background is that I used to be a school teacher, I have 3 young children who have 5 cousins, and I teach a 5 to 8 year old room at church. My wife ...
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  • 3,366
8 votes

How to help our 2.5-year-old daughter deal with an abusive 5-year-old boy?

No 2.5 year old should have to deal with a bully, even to the extent of calling for help. If this is happening regularly then the kindergarten is failing to supervise the children properly. If at all ...
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  • 9,338
7 votes

How to help my son to resolve the problem with school bullies?

I think there are lots of possible responses and the one that you choose depends on your values and ability to do the response fully. When I was bullied at school, although I was doing karate at the ...
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  • 618
7 votes

Boy defending himself from sister, or fight back?

Oh boy. There are a number of things you need to deal with here. First is the idea of "Boys are stronger, girls are smarter. You can't hit girls back". That is a broad, sweeping statement. It ...
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  • 13.3k
6 votes
Accepted

How to protect my children from cyber-bullying

You use the same approach you would use for just about any other "how to protect my children" question. Step 1: educate yourself. The first thing you have to do is educate yourself. What does your ...
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  • 2,092
6 votes

How to protect my children from cyber-bullying

Unfortunately a lot of the Internet is a 'Wild West' environment - you cannot completely prevent cyber bullying. That said, there are a number of options which can help. I'm guessing you are not a ...
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  • 26.4k
6 votes

How to help a bullied child (without involving parents or teachers)

This situation sounds like fairly normal social behavior for boys. Getting defensive about normal interactions would likely alienate the others and destroy any chance for long-term friendship. The ...
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  • 237

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