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173 votes

Son was sent home from sleepover for behavior

It is a learning opportunity, but for more than one person, especially your child and you. First, you need to get the whole story, and you can't get it all from your son; he may well not understand ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
143 votes

Why don't children know why they do things?

"I don't know why" could mean a number of things: The answer is something that will make my parent annoyed if I'm honest. It's not an outright lie to say "I don't know", but it's a dodge to avoid ...
Acire's user avatar
  • 22.6k
139 votes

How to answer my 5 year old why I can tell her what she has to do, and why she can't tell me what to do

Try to go along this line: There are rules that exist for everyone. I have to go to work. You have to go to school. I tell you about the rules because I know them; I don't just make them up to ...
MakorDal's user avatar
  • 1,882
128 votes
Accepted

18-month-old kicked out of church nursery

Since you're talking about church, I take it religious beliefs should be on topic here. There are two commandments that supersede (and contain) all the others. One of them is You shall love your ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
109 votes

How to tell my 4-year-old son not to get hyper with his uncle or anyone except parents?

Kids are going to be kids. There is a lot of social etiquette and nuance that they will learn as they gain experience. Four years old is not the time. You should not place this burden on your child at ...
Ian MacDonald's user avatar
101 votes
Accepted

Grandparents want our three year old daughter to throw tantrums like her cousin did

What a pickle you're in! I find it hard to imagine an adult who demands proof of love from a 3 year old by her being distressed (begging and crying). But there you have it. Your parents delight in ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
98 votes

How to deal with my 12 year old son being allegedly caught cheating at school

First, I would (as Becuzz mentioned) sit down with him and hear his side of the story. It may be that he was cheating, and in this case, if he seems properly repentant and embarrassed, you might work ...
Francine DeGrood Taylor's user avatar
98 votes
Accepted

Should I be restrictive in my son's interest in electricity?

I'm no parent, but an electrical engineer. So I will focus mainly on the safety aspects, and on how to push him towards safer branches of electronics. I think encouraging his interest in electronics ...
Sandro's user avatar
  • 686
84 votes
Accepted

My son refuses to celebrate. What should parents do?

I don't know what culture you are coming from, but in the U.S., a birthday celebration is for the celebrant more than it is for the attendees. From that point of view, it would be pretty lousy to ...
Wayne Conrad's user avatar
  • 1,972
76 votes

Why is trying to talk children out of how they feel a bad idea?

The definition you've likely found was the definition of talking something out. "to settle something by discussion: Let's not get mad. Let's just talk it out. Please, let's talk out this matter calmly....
user25972's user avatar
  • 955
70 votes
Accepted

How to handle my little brother's addiction to videogames?

This is anecdotal but... Throughout highschool my life was: wake-up, go to school, come home, game, go to bed, repeat. As I developed other hobbies, I did those instead of gaming. As money to buy ...
BunnyKnitter's user avatar
  • 2,140
69 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

Your parents are being lenient I'm not sure where you live, but in the State of NJ, the penalties for underage drinking are a fine between $500-$1,000 and imprisonment for up to 6 months. You've ...
Pyrotechnical's user avatar
66 votes
Accepted

Should endless "but what if" questions be encouraged or discouraged?

In my opinion (as a parent, not a psychologist or educator), curiosity is not something that should ever be discouraged... except that everything has limits rooted in practicality. What the child is ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
66 votes

Why my kids don't get excited to see me

This is pretty normal with parents everywhere - we're not interesting or different, we're just ... there. Go on a trip without your kids for a few weeks, and you'll see some very excited kids when ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
64 votes

How to get my 4yo daughter's fixation on my belly button under control?

I would try appealing to her sense of empathy. She is young, but should be able to understand that you don't like/feel comfortable with her poking your navel, and if prompted she may be able to ...
Mrssbolton's user avatar
57 votes

How to answer my 5 year old why I can tell her what she has to do, and why she can't tell me what to do

Seems to me this is something where the truth is a good answer. You are responsible for her, because of her lack of experience and lack of maturity. The more she can show maturity, the less you need ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
57 votes

Get around peer's mind games gracefully

I think the first thing is to take a step back and consider that they are both acting normally for their age. It's normal at age 2 and 3 to have limited social skills, limited empathy for others, and ...
Meg's user avatar
  • 7,874
56 votes

12 year old boy is totally out of control

You have my sympathy, and a lot of it. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Part of this is the age.* TL;DR: You're not alone. Many have walked this path and come through on the other side with a ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
55 votes

Why don't children know why they do things?

I think it's not surprising a seven year old doesn't know exactly why he does what he does. I often don't know why I do things that I know I shouldn't, not really - at least, until I spend a lot of ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
52 votes

Does toddler keep hands around private parts?

Although it is always wise to be cautious about the safety of your young child, in general it is developmentally normal and natural (and not at all sexual in the adult sense) for a three year old to ...
Meg's user avatar
  • 7,874
51 votes
Accepted

How to get my younger sister to listen?

You're in a complicated position, but if it helps, so are most of us parents! What works will likely be the same sort of thing that works for me with my eight year old. Treat her like an adult, for ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
50 votes
Accepted

Do parents get punishment too?

As parents we start by modelling behaviour for our children. Show by your good example what you as a family do and how you act and react when a wilful or unwillful mistake is made. Discipline should ...
WRX's user avatar
  • 17.4k
50 votes

8 year old is breaking the rules, and not understanding consequences

First: do not, under any circumstances, try to "trigger" them. That's a great way to end up in a reddit thread a decade or so down the line complaining about the child's mentally abusive ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
49 votes

To what extent should an (almost) two year old be able to lie still on command?

I am a physician, starting as a Family Practitioner and switching to Emergency Medicine. I can safely say that over the decades, I've examined and done procedures of some kind, including suturing ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
48 votes

Is it possible to spoil a child, but still teach them not to behave spoiled?

I don't believe you can spoil a child without having them act spoiled. You can't jump in a pool without getting wet, just like you can't spoil a child without having it affect them. Spoiling a child ...
Becuzz's user avatar
  • 13.3k
48 votes

Why do I have negative feelings about my mother?

I don't think you hate your Mother as strongly as you think you do. We always get angry with those that are near us. It seems to be the easiest way to vent. I remember being 16 and the reason why is ...
Bugs's user avatar
  • 2,080
47 votes

How to answer my 5 year old why I can tell her what she has to do, and why she can't tell me what to do

I think you have a perfect opportunity to wow her. She should be able to tell you what to do. In the morning we need to brush our teeth. If I forget, you will tell me to brush my teeth. If you want,...
vbp13's user avatar
  • 650
43 votes

My son refuses to celebrate. What should parents do?

Who are you celebrating for? If you're celebrating for yourself, then ... go do that. Go to a nice restaurant and give yourself a nice dinner to congratulate yourself for raising a child to 13 (and ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
42 votes

How to instill scepticism towards authority, albeit in a healthy way?

"Healthy disrespect" for authority has a wide definition. Based on your question, I'm going to define it as "not accepting blindly what authority figures tell him, but not doing it in ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k

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