148
votes
Am I interrupting my husband's parenting?
I was the oldest of six kids. My youngest brother was born when I was 18. By the time I escaped to college, I knew all about babies. I could change a diaper in fifteen seconds flat (well, okay, the ...
131
votes
Accepted
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
Play all the music. See what he enjoys. Play that.
I have some bad news. Your son is quite likely to love dumb bouncy pop stuff like "Let's Get Ready to Rumble" because he's two and it's all bouncy. ...
75
votes
Accepted
How can I convince my parents to accept my approach on school?
If you want them to accept your approach, you're going to have to show them you've truly mitigated that risk. The only way I can see to do that is landing some good-paying ($25/hour+) programming ...
57
votes
Am I interrupting my husband's parenting?
If by interrupting, you mean undermining your husband's parenting, yes, you are doing that. It doesn't mean that your husband is always right or that your approach is wrong; it only means that you ...
56
votes
12 year old boy is totally out of control
You have my sympathy, and a lot of it. I'm so sorry you're going through this. Part of this is the age.*
TL;DR: You're not alone. Many have walked this path and come through on the other side with a ...
53
votes
How can I convince my parents to accept my approach on school?
If you are ever going to be able to convince your parents about this, you first need to understand them. If you don't understand what they are thinking and what they value here, your arguments are ...
42
votes
Accepted
Wife agrees with parenting, but is intentionally less strict
I agree that this couple could probably benefit from some couples counseling. Mom is putting an unfair burden on dad and it may take some support from an outside party to help both parents understand ...
39
votes
Accepted
How to talk to parents about my mental health
There are some problems common to many parents:
parents might think they have a responsibility to fix things, not to feel things with you.
Parenting styles differ. Parents with Authoritarian ...
38
votes
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
Let him listen to whatever he wants and let him BE whoever he wants to be. Just because you would like your son to listen to certain type of music or you would like him to be a musician doesn't mean ...
36
votes
Wife agrees with parenting, but is intentionally less strict
You and your wife have a fundamental disagreement here. Not necessarily about parenting.
If you have expressed that this makes you unhappy and your wife is on board with the necessity of disciplining ...
35
votes
How to deal with parents that enforce a curfew on an adult
I also had parents that enforced curfew and rules on me past the time that it would normally be expected (until I completed college), and the thing that helped most was proving that I had moved past ...
34
votes
12 year old boy is totally out of control
I'm writing this as a guest because I don't want this associated with my professional account, but I feel I can help you understand your son because he sounds just like how I was at that age.
I used ...
24
votes
Am I interrupting my husband's parenting?
In addition to the other excellent answers about your son playing you off each other, I wanted to add one thing. If you're like a lot of families, one parent spends a lot more time taking care of the ...
22
votes
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
From my personal experience, if you want your child to enjoy the things you do, make it fun and expose them to it regularly.
My son is 4 now, but when he was younger I would sing to him every night ...
20
votes
How can I convince my parents to accept my approach on school?
Having gone through to almost the same process and ending up in a position that works out pretty well, I can say that this approach can work, assuming you really are as smart as you claim to be. A ...
19
votes
Wife agrees with parenting, but is intentionally less strict
It sounds like, to me, that you do not both agree on discipline. Your wife may well say she does, but I'd guess she doesn't, and simply doesn't want to argue with you about it (perhaps, argue again). ...
17
votes
Accepted
My husband and I have different opinions on parenting
Here's my personal take on this...like you, my husband and I often disagree on parenting issues, and we have managed to work out some practices that help deal with these differences.
I'd say your ...
15
votes
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
Your kids will get their own tastes in music no matter what you do, so it's an unproductive argument to have with a spouse. Do you listen to exactly what your parents played you? I highly doubt it. I ...
15
votes
My son calls my father in law Grandpa "nonno" (in italian) and his wife (step grandma) is telling my son to call him just Grandpa now not nonno
I think you should tell your son to call his grandpa whatever he is comfortable calling his grandpa unless his grandpa asks him to call him something else. You're not overreacting and I think you are ...
15
votes
Is my mom overly controlling?
On items 1 and 2: corporal punishment is a controversial issue that I won't get into here, but punching, choking and throwing things are definitely over the line. This is not discipline, it is child ...
14
votes
How to deal with parents that enforce a curfew on an adult
I suggest that you critically examine your own question. Because if you think about it logically, it doesn't make a lot of sense.
You start with the statement(s) that you a 23 year old adult...
Well ...
11
votes
Accepted
How to deal with my son calling me on the telephone when he is in a fight with his mother?
I'm not going to suggest a quick fix; this takes time. But it involves and imparts life skills.
Things that are helpful in situations like these:
Realize that it's not your job to fix other people'...
11
votes
What to do when there's a conflict between my husband and my 14-year-old daughter?
So there is a lot going on here.
I'm going to set aside the fact that he's not her biological father - this is something that teenagers do to any authority figure, biological or not. (They actually ...
11
votes
Accepted
Should a 6 year old's grandmother be kept away if she is abusive to her father?
TL:DR: Set boundaries.
This is not at all uncommon, and because of that, it takes a fair amount of insight to label yelling as abuse, but abuse it is. You're asking if witnessing abuse is bad for ...
11
votes
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
I agree with the rest of the answers here, largely, in that you should remember your son is a separate person, and should not go into this thinking he's going to do what you want him to do with his ...
11
votes
How to talk to parents about my mental health
Maybe your parents aren't the right people to talk with about it. Not that they don't care, but there might be better chance to get what you need from other people - friends, or a support group. I ...
10
votes
Parents disagree on type of music for toddler's listening
Warning: Some of this post is going to come across as a little harsh, but everything I say, I say because I want to help. Anything that I say bluntly, I say it that way because I think that hearing it ...
9
votes
How do we address other adults telling my son to ask us to bring him to their house?
Should we say something to my SIL (who will, incidentally, burst into tears at virtually any criticism)?
If it were me and if someone would have been bothering me like that, I would have spoken the ...
9
votes
How can I stop my parents from fighting?
Brianna, if you have a religious mentor, or an aunt or uncle, or even a trusted teacher, you could speak directly with them and express your fears and concerns.
In the meanwhile you could try to ...
9
votes
Wife agrees with parenting, but is intentionally less strict
Many people mistake discipline for only punishment:
If you cannot simply reason it out with your wife, perhaps suggest a parenting class or family counselling. She sounds like she understands that ...
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