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46 votes
Accepted

Do young children hold grudges?

First - I'm very surprised to see the parents asked you to break the news to the children. It seems to me like this is the sort of thing they should be doing! Second - what you're describing is ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 63.2k
39 votes

Should I have the same bedtime as my sister?

I'm going to interpret the question as asking how a parent can manage the bedtimes of siblings of different ages, as I think that's a great question, and answerable (as opposed to asking for an ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 63.2k
34 votes

Son chooses what my daughter chose then gets upset he doesn't get it

People are not robbed of choices they were never given to begin with. Asking two children open-ended "which would you like?"-style questions is a recipe for disaster if you don't have the resources ...
zzzzBov's user avatar
  • 1,502
33 votes

Older brother licking younger sister's legs

I would see the main issue that should be addressed already in the first paragraph and the rest just an instance of that. The son is playing/ touching your daughter, she explicitly tells him to stop ...
quarague's user avatar
  • 646
18 votes

Son chooses what my daughter chose then gets upset he doesn't get it

Have you considered that your son may be "deliberately" forcing the conflict? I put "deliberately" in quotes, because it probably isn't conscious or intentional, but doesn't seem like any coincidence ...
Chris Sunami's user avatar
  • 6,213
17 votes

Do young children hold grudges?

"Holding grudges" has a negative connotation, so I wouldn't quite phrase it that way. Can young children remember who, for example, they cannot trust any longer? Absolutely. I agree with @...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
15 votes

How to make my 15-year-old daughter want to meet her 39-year-old sister?

To be honest, I can see your fifteen-year-old daughter's point of view. Why should she want to meet this grown-up that hasn't mattered in her life up to now? What positive change in her life would ...
Pascal remembers Monica's user avatar
14 votes

Preparing a 3-year old for the death of a sibling

I'm truly sorry for your situation, that's a horrific & traumatic experience to go through. I wouldn't worry too much about the direct impact on your 3 year old. She is still very young and quite ...
Hilmar's user avatar
  • 7,482
14 votes

Older brother licking younger sister's legs

My question is basically, is it normal or okay for a boy of that age to be licking his younger sister like that? This is definitely not "normal" behavior, normal being defined as occurring ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
11 votes
Accepted

Do my parents hate me?

We have no way to know the truth of this situation so my advice is: Set a time and a place for a meeting with your parents so you can talk it out. Your sibling should not be there and TV and so on ...
WRX's user avatar
  • 17.4k
11 votes
Accepted

How to explain to a toddler why she doesn't have siblings?

If it makes you feel any better to know this, kids with siblings ask this. In fact I recently had my nearly 8 year inform me that he is ready for another sibling in about a year, for what reason, I ...
threetimes's user avatar
  • 7,330
11 votes
Accepted

Toddler Being Mean to Baby

We struggled with this too. I don't think we found a perfect solution, and eight years later still have some issues of this nature; but what did seem to help was focusing on the feelings. By this I ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 63.2k
10 votes

Evidence that kids from big families are happier and better-functioning

My perception is that a child's social adjustment is more complex than just how many siblings they have. For example: there are articles discussing how Only Children are More Successful while you can ...
Calvin Smythe's user avatar
8 votes

How can I get my children to develop a half sibling relationship

Please put yourself in your daughter's position for a moment: You are 11. You are starting to discuss "cool" things with your girlfriends and can't wait to be a bit older. And with a bit of ...
Stephie's user avatar
  • 18.2k
8 votes

Son chooses what my daughter chose then gets upset he doesn't get it

There are a number of good answers already but I didn't see anyone mention giving one sibling the chance to pick for the other and rotate. Day 1: Son, which plate do you think your sister would like? ...
JeffC's user avatar
  • 180
8 votes

How to help 3-year-old stop playing so hard with 1-year-old?

I've witnessed this behavior before between my oldest and my newest. In the beginning he would treat new baby kind of rough. It's hard for children to gauge their own strength sometimes. It's also ...
SomeShinyObject's user avatar
8 votes
Accepted

Should we be concerned about preschool siblings playing "sexual" games?

This kind of "playing doctor" seems pretty common and nothing to be overly worried about, though I don't have any statistics (reliable ones would be difficult to collect, to put it mildly). ...
Paul Johnson's user avatar
  • 10.5k
7 votes

Do my parents hate me?

It is difficult for us to guess: What is the reality of the situation, because everyone is biased, and you must be, too. And maybe there are a lot of situations where they think about you first, but ...
dim's user avatar
  • 273
7 votes

Should I have the same bedtime as my sister?

Teens should get between 8-10 hours of sleep a night. Since you are at the young end of that range, you should err on the side of needing closer to 10 hours https://www.cdc.gov/healthyschools/...
swbarnes2's user avatar
  • 4,004
7 votes

Older brother licking younger sister's legs

oof. That's a lot. First, I would be clear with your wife that you would have the same response to any young boy doing that (I assume) -- particularly in a repeated fashion. It doesn't matter what ...
ness's user avatar
  • 249
6 votes

How do you pass hand-me-downs to a younger sibling without fostering resentment?

I am the youngest of four children. I found, especially when I was younger, that it was not an issue when I got hand me downs. The issues arise when I got older and started, not only being self-...
John's user avatar
  • 61
6 votes

My sister is talking to a guy way older than she is - should I let her?

No, you generally shouldn't prevent an adult from speaking to another adult. No, you can't "let" an adult relative date someone else. This is not a right of yours, and also not something you can ...
Peter's user avatar
  • 2,899
6 votes

Between parents and marijuana smoking sister

I would go to your sister and say, "I am uncomfortable with you smoking marijuana, because I know our parents don't want you to be doing it. I don't want to rat you out, but you're putting me in a bad ...
MAA's user avatar
  • 3,213
6 votes

How to stop my 5-year-old from being very combative to my 2-year-old?

In one part of your description, you said he is constantly mean to my baby! This may be reflective of something that is part of the issue. Remember that until a couple of years ago, the one who ...
Mrssbolton's user avatar
6 votes

How to make my 15-year-old daughter want to meet her 39-year-old sister?

My 15 year old daughter doesn't want to meet her 39 year old sister. This is kind of a tricky scenario. It's hard enough on your younger daughter that her parents separated and dad is dating again ...
jcmack's user avatar
  • 1,065
6 votes

When to introduce a half-sibling?

I think you son needs to know he exists, even if he's too young to play with. I think you should go with what the expert told you. Also, at 10 months, your younger son is not a featureless blob like ...
swbarnes2's user avatar
  • 4,004

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