58

Welcome to the "Terrible Two's"! Your son behaves typically for his age. At 2 he starts to assert himself and express his demands. It's likely that he has also learned that he gets his way when he throws a tantrum. For a 2-year old screaming, hitting or even biting is a normal way to express his anger - at least he will try and every success reinforces ...


55

From your description, it does not sound like your son has an irrational fear of strangers. He may simply hate being picked up by them, and have learned that this is a plausible outcome of strangers approaching too closely. If this is the case, then it seems to be that its the people who pick him up without consent need to change, not him. There are few ...


53

Of all your suggestions, only one really says “it’s not ok to kick the dinosaurs”. The other are sending a different message, which can be summed up as Don’t do it when [some else with more power] sees it, because there may be undesirable consequences. The logical next step for some clever kids is to do exactly what you don’t want them to do the moment ...


50

How do I deal with the situation? How do I discipline her? I think a lot of people are equating "discipline" to "punishment", when that isn't necessarily the case. Unfortunately your question doesn't tell us much about your values or parenting style, so I can only provide a few comments and possible directions you might go in. Summary ...


44

As someone with mild Asperger's, I think I can shed some insight onto this situation. Let's look at what happened, as well as giving some ways to prevent this type of behavior in the future. The Event As a 7-year-old, your child should already have a basic sense of right and wrong - don't hit others, be nice to their parents and teacher, etc. Where the ...


41

Our daughter intellectually understands our reasoning and accepted our decision without fuss. But of course she was disappointed and sad on the evening of the party. This is a good outcome and probably the best you can hope for. It's perfectly okay and normal to be sad & disappointed, I would be too. How can we help our children deal with situations ...


35

Whether she realises it consciously or not, she is directly undermining and interfering with your ability to parent your children. She is not their parent, nor their legal guardian, and has no right to do that. How you handle this depends on whether it's just you and the kids, or you and your wife with the kids, when she is present. When you're with your ...


32

I just found out that my daughter wrote in her diary... How did you find that out? Did she tell you it was written in there? Did you read it when she expects it to not be read? If you allow your child to have a diary and tell her that these are her private thoughts, and then you invade her private thoughts without telling her, you are giving her the ...


31

To directly answer your question: if the topic comes up a potentially good answer would be "well my father/husband passed away a long time ago". The "a long time ago" basically indicates that this is in the past and has no immediate bearing on the present. It also indicates that the case is closed and you don't want to discuss this further. Most people will ...


27

Something that hasn't been addressed is why the child is kicking the dinosaur. They are bored with the park or this exhibit ("Hey, don't damage the exhibits. If you're bored let's go and see the XYZ.") They are imagining fighting a dinosaur (Acknowledge the story. Compliment their bravery etc. Engage the imagination by talking about fighting a ...


26

There is not very much detail here and so it makes it difficult to know exactly why you're worried about this situation. In general, I would not worry. [If it turns out that the boy in question is (a) significantly older or (b) pressuring/forcing her into the idea of being in love, then do be concerned (but don't blame her).] My daughter (also 10) has had ...


24

Mothers do what fathers do: love their children unconditionally and raise them to be independent, happy contributing members of society. My husband and I have different approaches towards the kids, but those are much more based on personality and background than gender. We both love our kids to death and show them that every day, and we both try to teach ...


22

First of all, recognize there is a difference between having a favorite, and engaging in favoritism. I think having a favorite is somewhat unavoidable, unless your children all happen to have personalities that mesh equally well with yours. When having a favorite becomes problematic is when you let it affect your words and actions toward your children. ...


22

When a child does something that makes another child feel bad, whether violence or just selfish behavior (which is basically what you're describing), my go-to at any age is to show the child how the other child feels. Ask her to look at the other child's face, which is presumably sad, and point out why. This does two things. It helps to emphasize the ...


21

I hear a couple different things here, so I will approach them 1 at a time. First, your girl... News flash: ready? She's 3. 3 year olds don't know much about anything, let alone how to effectively defend themselves to a bully. So that's where parents come in. Most adults don't even know how to effectively handle a bully. She likely can't even remember what ...


21

I meet people at local meetups. Where I live there are about three Python meetups a month. My experiences have been great: excellent programmers who just like to talk shop. While you will likely meet others at your skill level, you won't meet people at your age level. It will mostly be older people (e.g. college age or higher), but if the goal is to talk ...


21

My nine year old has had similar difficulties, although he does not yet have an official diagnosis. These are some things we found to help: First of all, consider that he doesn't need a lot of friends, he just needs one good one. It can take a while to find one, but there is someone out there who is the right mix of tolerance and kindness and quirkiness ...


21

Just to add to what other posters have said, this can be a good time to give a child a lesson in empathy as well. Something like "Well, that dinosaur belongs to someone. Would you like it if someone kicked your <favourite toy, games console, etc>?". They would most likely say no, so then the obvious next question is "Why not?"


20

When all else fails, they can fall back on a version of Miss Manner's timeless response, "I'm sorry, that's just not possible." In this case, something along the lines of "I'm sorry, I don't want to talk about it," or "This subject is still painful for me, can we talk about something else?" might be useful. Don't expect everyone to have manners and not ...


20

I think you're being wise here. Acknowledge your son's true feelings of love and admiration for his playmate. But to have him express these feelings might cause some discomfort in someone in whom the feelings aren't reciprocated. As he has asked what he should do, you are giving him good advice. I would explain the consequences you mention in a gentle and ...


18

You recognize already that this is a developmental issue. It takes time, work, and maturity to develop. In addition, I think what you are describing is more than an appreciation issue. It can also be about control. A five-year-old has very little control in her life - she doesn't get to choose how the money is spent, what time she goes to bed, what she ...


18

Quietly and politely, tell the child to please not kick the dino and give the best possible (age-appropriate) reason. Something like "Please don't kick the dino. The dinos in the park are not for kicking. If other kids start kicking them, the dinos will fall apart and then next time we come to the park, there will be nothing to play with." ...


17

shouts at me in front of them... Ask her to leave. Don't even wait for your wife to get home. It's healthy for your children to see how you're able to handle such situations with cool and determination. And of course, you can let her stay if she apologizes and if you feel she is genuinely remorseful. That being said, I have feeling you're not telling us ...


16

Some of the main proponents of attachment theory, which is a theory of how children develop a relationship with their primary caregiver and how that impacts their relationships throughout the rest of their life, are generally opposed to daycare, as described in this article. If you look into attachment theory and daycare you will find more information from ...


15

I'm 15, and I had this same problem about a year ago. There's an awesome community called HS Hackers on Facebook. To call it lifechanging would be a gross understatement. Hackathons are the best way to meet other talented (and often young) programmers. Hackathons are basically coding marathons. The best event to go to would be a CodeDay. It's a 24 hour ...


15

Your child may not realize that what they did was wrong, but if you don't teach them that taking things belonging to others is wrong, they won't learn (others might assume they've learnt that at home), and will face more difficulty in the future for it. Punishments are meant to hurt somehow; you don't need to punish them. You do need to talk with them and ...


15

This feels like very normal behaviour for an only child of 17 months; and the paediatrician is right that socialisation will solve most of the issues. That said, you're the parents, so while it's the school's job to handle this when the child is in their care, it's your job by default. To be honest, all you're seeing here is the standard impulse control ...


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