211
votes
Teenage daughter refusing to go to school
(Background: I saw this question on SE and am answering from an anonymous account because of personal details). I'm not a parent but feel the need to post because this resonated strongly with me.
...
- 2,319
130
votes
My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?
I'm from the UK too.
Call the parents and check the message was actually sent by them, it seems rather stupid that they would volunteer that information for no reason. I have had my Facebook hacked ...
- 1,021
125
votes
How to deal with a 6 year old who was "caught" cheating?
You may not like this answer, but bear with me for a moment, please.
So first, let’s recap what happened. Your son checked the answers for a test, during the test, in order to correct possible ...
- 18k
98
votes
How to deal with my 12 year old son being allegedly caught cheating at school
First, I would (as Becuzz mentioned) sit down with him and hear his side of the story. It may be that he was cheating, and in this case, if he seems properly repentant and embarrassed, you might work ...
- 8,977
93
votes
Accepted
Should I buy my college child a vehicle when I can afford to or make him earn it on his own?
I like the way my mother did:
I told my mother I was going to buy my first car. She listened to me, my budget, my pro's and con's and once I had picked a car I could afford and was planning to get it ...
- 1,058
90
votes
Teenage daughter refusing to go to school
First, please let me express my sympathy with what seems to be an extremely difficult situation. What follows does not mean I am not sympathetic with your struggles.
You seem to have a few ideas of ...
- 68.1k
90
votes
Should I buy my college child a vehicle when I can afford to or make him earn it on his own?
Mine is getting ready to head off to college soon too, it's a fine line to tread between spoiling and being too detached. The way I put it to my kid is that as long s/he is either gainfully employed ...
- 1,009
75
votes
Accepted
How should a jobless father advise his son when he refuses to study because of his educated jobless dad?
First and foremost, that logic is not sound. The argument boils down to "bad things happen no matter what, so why should I try?"
To give an analogous example, I can take meticulous care of my car ...
- 13.3k
73
votes
Accepted
What's the motivation behind school uniforms {or} Why can't my daughter wear a dang princess on her shirt?
I wore a school uniform (very similar to what you describe) from ages 10 - 17. There were some benefits to it such as not having to waste time figuring out what to wear and not feeling "judged" by my ...
- 1,879
65
votes
How can I teach a teenager to plan better and procrastinate less in his studies?
Sounds like a common problem for gifted children: they finally reach a level where sitting back and coasting isn't enough, and having to actually put in some effort comes as a serious shock. Often ...
- 9,517
61
votes
Teenage daughter refusing to go to school
There's a very good chance your daughter is being bullied.
My experience with my then 13-year-old son was almost identical to what you describe. It took several months to find out what exactly was ...
- 719
55
votes
How can I convince my child to write?
First, please know that I agree 100% with @David Hedlund's answer in its entirety. I just want to address one particular point that needs to be stressed.
His teacher says if this type of behavior ...
- 68.1k
50
votes
How to encourage children to do their homework?
...knowledge and mastery ought to be its own reward.
Question: do you work (at your job) for free because it's rewarding and what you want to do? No, you work because you get a paycheck for it. (I ...
- 68.1k
48
votes
Why do I have negative feelings about my mother?
I don't think you hate your Mother as strongly as you think you do. We always get angry with those that are near us. It seems to be the easiest way to vent.
I remember being 16 and the reason why is ...
- 2,080
47
votes
Should I buy my college child a vehicle when I can afford to or make him earn it on his own?
Buy him a used vehicle. Let hm earn his first "new" car.
I am like you; I worked for everything I got. I started working after school at 15, and at 17 I bought my first used Volkswagen Bug for 400$ (...
- 68.1k
46
votes
What's the motivation behind school uniforms {or} Why can't my daughter wear a dang princess on her shirt?
Lots of reasons.
Keeps kids on level ground, economically. Uniforms are generally pretty cheap and no one gets ridiculed for their choice of clothes.
Keeps kids safe. Have you ever tried to herd a ...
- 1,388
42
votes
How can I teach a teenager to plan better and procrastinate less in his studies?
I would like to supplement Paul's answer a little by abstracting a little bit. The reason gifted children may have this behavior is because the adults near them praise them for how smart they are, not ...
- 1,082
37
votes
School told my daughter Charlie Chaplin’s speech was “offensive”
I think the first step is to write to the PA asking for clarification:
Was the video actually rejected as offensive? If I understand your post correctly, you only have your daughter's report on that.
...
- 9,517
34
votes
I want to dropout of HS yet my dad is mad at my decision
You need a better plan, kid.
This will be a bit of a harsh answer, but you definitely seem smart and mature enough to deserve one. First of all, don't waste a single further breath explaining your "...
- 581
34
votes
My son's handwriting is so poor that even he can't read it. How can I help him improve?
There are a lot of different things that might help, depending on the child, but ultimately what has to change is the child's choice to pay attention to details.
I had pretty poor handwriting as a ...
- 60.3k
33
votes
My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?
Give it time; time helps a lot. It's only been a few days, and this is quite a shock, especially to your daughter who probably worried for her friend's health/life. She's experienced a profound ...
- 68.1k
31
votes
A religious teacher slapped my son twice for refuting God, what should I do?
I'm going to skip over the entire religious part of the question and answer what you should do about the much simpler part:
If a teacher physically assaulted your son over a verbal debate, you should ...
- 8,335
31
votes
Teenage daughter refusing to go to school
First, I agree with the other posters who suggest that your daughter may be trying to avoid an abusive situation, and that this should be taken very seriously. In the short term, though, what should ...
- 477
30
votes
Teenage daughter refusing to go to school
Have you tried talking to her?
The first question I would ask is:
Would you like to change school?
If she said yes, ask why.
I had a similar issue with my sister-in-law, she didn't wanted to go ...
- 401
30
votes
How to deal with a 6 year old who was "caught" cheating?
I was furious, so I called the vice-principal and asked why a 6-year-old was shamed and that child doesn't know the concept of cheating. The VP told me that he was not shamed in front of the class but ...
- 633
29
votes
How should a jobless father advise his son when he refuses to study because of his educated jobless dad?
Could tell him it is the difference between having a chance and having no chance. People can work hard and do all the right things and still end up unemployed with a low standard of life, but on the ...
- 3,183
28
votes
Accepted
Should I allow or forbid my son to visit the education of a religion that I do not share?
I think the key question to ask is,
Is your son capable of not believing what he's told in his Religion class?
If he's capable of disbelieving it, then he's not being brainwashed, and there's no ...
- 1,174
28
votes
Accepted
How to make a 6-year-old stop being too competitive for his own good?
Experiencing failure at something (or even success but not being the best) and finding that it's OK, and even something can help him find ways to improve and be better in the future, would help. Rock ...
- 456
26
votes
What's the motivation behind school uniforms {or} Why can't my daughter wear a dang princess on her shirt?
School uniforms eliminate any questions of what is or is not appropriate. There is no subjective component to a teachers objection to being out of uniform, versus the news hype raised over t shirts ...
- 3,647
Only top scored, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible