172

So... I've raced bikes and from my experience, they are probably littering. As much as a race organizer may try to clean up after a race the distance covered and volume of waste generated during a race means trash is spread along hundreds of miles and clean up is not going to be 100% effective. Those racers are probably also practicing sanctioned littering....


125

You may not like this answer, but bear with me for a moment, please. So first, let’s recap what happened. Your son checked the answers for a test, during the test, in order to correct possible mistakes. Technically this exactly what cheating is - getting the correct answers from other sources than the own knowledge or conclusions. The standard procedure in ...


100

My friend obviously did not react well when she found out about the incident. How should she make up for it to her daughter? She should apologize. You say your friend didn't react ideally, I'd say she reacted stupidly. She got angry at her daughter because she was clueless when everyone else wasn't. Her daughter did nothing wrong, and your friend got angry ...


83

Ask yourself: If you were the teacher, would you rather be warned or find yourself suddenly facing a 2nd grader with a full-blown asthma attack? I don't think your request is unreasonable. And you are not expecting her to watch your son like a hawk, or do something super-taxing, but just to be aware of a special situation. If you phrase your request ...


79

I wouldn't consider that dark. Dark would be every drawing having family members dead or something. Specific to people you know. I used to draw medieval scenes with gruesome atrocities but it was not cause I was disturbed or anything. Still got me sent to psychologists which was a complete waste of time. Should you be worried? I say no. Not yet. How should ...


76

Disclaimer: I'm not a parent so I can't speak from personal experience. Also, there seem to be several issues, but the main one is how to talk to her about her weight, so I will cover only that with some, hopefully, helpful suggestions. 1) Don't focus on her weight As you described pretty vividly, it just doesn't work. But she is also not obese - so I ...


74

You have lots of options. Here's one: At dinner one evening, you can say you have a serious announcement. Then tell your mom and dad that you're pregnant. You're really sorry you slipped up, but it will all be OK, not to worry, because you're in love and you plan to marry the father. Unfortunately, you can't bring the father over to meet them because he's ...


67

It's so hard for parents when their children start to pull away. We may be parents, but we are also human beings. It hurts, even when we try not to show it. We question ourselves and if we are doing things "right". I remember when my oldest boy (he is now 20) stopped wanting to go to the movies with me. I was very upset; it was "our thing". It was an ...


59

Just be truthful. While the details about chemical addiction may fly over a 6 year old's head, the general idea is really not that hard to understand. Tell them that drugs are chemicals that can make people feel really good, but that may be very unhealthy. Fundamentally, it's like candy and sweets, but far more dangerous (the consequences are more than ...


58

I'm probably going to experience this situation pretty soon, too. One very interesting idea I've picked up a long time ago is not to accept a short "why" but encourage a full-sentence question. Requiring a full sentence forces the child to actually think about the topic before asking. What is the topic? What do I want to know? How can I phrase that? This ...


58

Your daughter is 16 years old. While you're right that she's "under [y]our roof and so [y]our rules", that's not going to last forever; presumably she'll be moving out to go to college (or something else) soon. At this point, your role as a parent is less about setting rules and more about helping her learn things. That's not to say rules don't need to ...


58

How do I express my feelings towards him being gay without actually hurting his feelings? Right now, you don't unless he asks. Even then, I'd equivocate ("Give me time to gather my thoughts. This is new to me. But please know that I love you.") You can express your feelings to your wife, or to your priest, or to your best friend. And read about it. ...


56

Kids love their parents. This is true the vast majority of the time, even when the parent is abusive and manipulative to an extraordinary degree. Therefore it is extremely difficult to form a close relationship with a child if you are trying to replace their parent. or if you make the biological parent wrong, or otherwise say bad things about them or about ...


47

What's important here is not the "littering" as such but that people are being responsible. I presume you want your son to be a responsible person in general so I'd focus on that and if he isn't too comfortable with what "responsible" means yet feel free to substitute "good or bad" as appropriate. TL;DR - Work with your son to see how hard it is to put ...


47

My general approach is that it's not a good idea to hide the world from your children. Of course I wouldn't go into the gruesome details of drug addiction, but my view is that when I explain this to my kids, then it is me who is in control of the narrative. In these cases I try to not "explain" the matter to my children, but to engage them in a conversation....


46

I tend to think some version of the truth is always best. To deal with this question when my son asked it, I used a fruit analogy: just like apples grow on trees, babies grow in their mommy's tummies; and just like there was no apple before it started growing, there was no baby before it started growing. I'd maybe skip the bit about exactly what triggers a ...


45

It's difficult to understand what children are actually seeking as an answer when they ask a question such as this. Since parents know the whole story, it's a challenge to tease out just enough information to satisfy the child without overburdening them. Asking some questions of them about what they think (maybe talking about other species) might give you an ...


44

I cannot really give first-hand advice, never having been in a similar situation. However, I would think the basic approach should be the same as for an adopted child. Basically: don't push information on the child she is not ready to handle, but don't make it a secret either There are multiple questions about how to handle adoption on this site, for ...


41

UPDATE: This is apparently affecting my dad so much that he's thinking about quitting work, and he's the only source of income. I need some step-by-step instructions on how to do this before it's too late. There is no step-by-step way to make someone feel better whom you've hurt. But here's some basic steps. Understand why what you said was unfair ...


39

I am not sure there is a right answer, but to me, it would make sense to do it together. The reasoning for this is the following: I feel it would be better to have both of you present for the discussion; this will hopefully set a signal that not one of you will be gone from your kids lives, but you will still be their parents. Now, whoever you tell ...


38

I don't see any reason why you should condone this behaviour, even if it is allowed by the authorities. If your child is interested in making sure trash ends up in the appropriate place, or isn't generated at all, you should be encouraging that. I think you're right. They should just put the garbage back in their pockets, shouldn't they? Maybe they'll get ...


35

I usually respond to endless 'why's with questions that focus on critical thinking. "Do you want french toast or pancakes for breakfast?" "Why?" "Well, which do you think would make your tummy happier?" "Why?" "We eat because we want happy bodies and happy tummies..." and at least with my two, it eventually winds down. Or maybe my questions overload their ...


35

Whether she realises it consciously or not, she is directly undermining and interfering with your ability to parent your children. She is not their parent, nor their legal guardian, and has no right to do that. How you handle this depends on whether it's just you and the kids, or you and your wife with the kids, when she is present. When you're with your ...


35

I have some experience in this area. About 10 years ago I married my wife, whose children were teenagers at the time. A lot of the tension from her divorce was dissolved rather quickly, and there is a lot of trust in our family now. So when we first got married we made the decision together to do a couple of things. First, I made it a point that I was going ...


31

Both my parents and my in-laws had similar issues when I first got married, so I think it's not that uncommon. I would try not to read anything bad into it. It's just a period of adjustment. First of all, consider that people naturally spend most of their leisure time with the people they live with. Think of when you were still living with your parents. ...


30

I want to tell my ex to stop using that kind of language when discussing these issues with me, but I don't know if this is a battle not worth fighting. If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. I presume you got divorced for a reason, possibly related to an inability to change a behavior or a lack of support, communication or understanding, etc. Let this ...


30

No parents are entitled to be told by their children about things they would want to know. It may be right for their kids to tell them, it may be good and helpful, it may be reasonable and all sorts of other things, but no parent is that special, privileged member of royalty who, when his or her child acts as children will act, gets to be super outraged and ...


30

I was furious, so I called the vice-principal and asked why a 6-year-old was shamed and that child doesn't know the concept of cheating. The VP told me that he was not shamed in front of the class but was brought to her office and she asked the reason, so my son told her that he was afraid that he might get fewer marks and parents would scold him. My son was ...


Only top voted, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible