171
votes
Accepted
How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?
So... I've raced bikes and from my experience, they are probably littering. As much as a race organizer may try to clean up after a race the distance covered and volume of waste generated during a ...
- 3,733
125
votes
How to deal with a 6 year old who was "caught" cheating?
You may not like this answer, but bear with me for a moment, please.
So first, let’s recap what happened. Your son checked the answers for a test, during the test, in order to correct possible ...
- 18.2k
109
votes
How to tell my 4-year-old son not to get hyper with his uncle or anyone except parents?
Kids are going to be kids. There is a lot of social etiquette and nuance that they will learn as they gain experience. Four years old is not the time. You should not place this burden on your child at ...
- 2,532
100
votes
Accepted
An incident happened at school and child didn't (want to) tell the parent
My friend obviously did not react well when she found out about the incident. How should she make up for it to her daughter?
She should apologize. You say your friend didn't react ideally, I'd say ...
- 8,745
80
votes
Accepted
What can I tell and what can I ask of a 2nd grade teacher, about my child's health?
Ask yourself:
If you were the teacher, would you rather be warned or find yourself suddenly facing a 2nd grader with a full-blown asthma attack?
I don't think your request is unreasonable. And you ...
- 18.2k
77
votes
Accepted
How should I respond to a 6 year old's dark drawings?
I wouldn't consider that dark. Dark would be every drawing having family members dead or something. Specific to people you know. I used to draw medieval scenes with gruesome atrocities but it was not ...
- 4,602
77
votes
How to talk to a teen daughter about her weight
Disclaimer: I'm not a parent so I can't speak from personal experience. Also, there seem to be several issues, but the main one is how to talk to her about her weight, so I will cover only that with ...
74
votes
Accepted
What do I do about my mom setting her expectations too high?
You have lots of options. Here's one:
At dinner one evening, you can say you have a serious announcement. Then tell your mom and dad that you're pregnant. You're really sorry you slipped up, but it ...
- 71.8k
68
votes
How do I explain the reasons behind protesting and rioting to my children?
To answer the question as to "why protests turn to riots" it often comes down to people not feeling like they are heard. Think about if you (or your child) is asking for something, something you ...
- 13.3k
60
votes
My 15-year-old son is gay. How do I express my feelings about this?
How do I express my feelings towards him being gay without actually hurting his feelings?
Right now, you don't unless he asks. Even then, I'd equivocate ("Give me time to gather my thoughts. This is ...
- 71.8k
59
votes
Accepted
How to talk to a teen daughter about her weight
Your daughter is 16 years old. While you're right that she's "under [y]our roof and so [y]our rules", that's not going to last forever; presumably she'll be moving out to go to college (or something ...
- 63.2k
59
votes
How can I handle a daughter who says she doesn't want to stay with me more than one day?
Well, not like that.
Your daughter voiced a perfectly reasonable sentiment (being away from home is disruptive, and some people really don't like disruptions like that). She even tried hard to make ...
- 3,159
58
votes
How to explain intravenous drug abuse to a 6-year-old?
Just be truthful. While the details about chemical addiction may fly over a 6 year old's head, the general idea is really not that hard to understand. Tell them that drugs are chemicals that can make ...
- 847
56
votes
My husband, who is my teen daughter's step father feels bad that he can't have a closer relationship with my daughter
Kids love their parents. This is true the vast majority of the time, even when the parent is abusive and manipulative to an extraordinary degree. Therefore it is extremely difficult to form a close ...
- 3,213
56
votes
How best for a trans/non-binary person to respond to their 6-year-old cousin asking if I'm a girl or a boy?
Six years old is old enough to understand gender in a general sense, and it’s definitely old enough to have an intelligent conversation about the complexities of gender.
So my answer is to be honest ...
- 63.2k
47
votes
How to answer my 4-year-old asking where she was when I was small and how she got in my tummy?
I tend to think some version of the truth is always best. To deal with this question when my son asked it, I used a fruit analogy: just like apples grow on trees, babies grow in their mommy's tummies; ...
- 3,213
47
votes
How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?
What's important here is not the "littering" as such but that people are being responsible.
I presume you want your son to be a responsible person in general so I'd focus on that and if he isn't too ...
- 661
47
votes
How to explain intravenous drug abuse to a 6-year-old?
My general approach is that it's not a good idea to hide the world from your children. Of course I wouldn't go into the gruesome details of drug addiction, but my view is that when I explain this to ...
- 596
44
votes
Accepted
How to answer my 4-year-old asking where she was when I was small and how she got in my tummy?
It's difficult to understand what children are actually seeking as an answer when they ask a question such as this. Since parents know the whole story, it's a challenge to tease out just enough ...
- 71.8k
42
votes
At what age should I tell my daughter that her real mother is dead?
I cannot really give first-hand advice, never having been in a similar situation. However, I would think the basic approach should be the same as for an adopted child. Basically:
don't push ...
- 2,917
42
votes
Accepted
How can I handle kids telling me extremely boring stuff?
To some degree, kids need you to act interested when you aren't; you can't fully avoid their 'boring' talk without it leaving them feeling unheard or unappreciated. There have already been two great ...
- 3,917
39
votes
Disclosing parent separation to all children together or each one separately
I am not sure there is a right answer, but to me, it would make sense to do it together.
The reasoning for this is the following:
I feel it would be better to have both of you present for the ...
- 3,099
39
votes
Accepted
How to talk to parents about my mental health
There are some problems common to many parents:
parents might think they have a responsibility to fix things, not to feel things with you.
Parenting styles differ. Parents with Authoritarian ...
- 71.8k
38
votes
How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?
I don't see any reason why you should condone this behaviour, even if it is allowed by the authorities. If your child is interested in making sure trash ends up in the appropriate place, or isn't ...
- 2,532
37
votes
My husband, who is my teen daughter's step father feels bad that he can't have a closer relationship with my daughter
I have some experience in this area. About 10 years ago I married my wife, whose children were teenagers at the time. A lot of the tension from her divorce was dissolved rather quickly, and there is a ...
- 470
37
votes
Accepted
How can I handle a daughter who says she doesn't want to stay with me more than one day?
I upvoted @Arno's answer because the advice is sound. I'd like to take a different approach. It will sound harsh, but please know I don't mean it to be harsh. I just mean it to hopefully be a better ...
- 71.8k
36
votes
How best for a trans/non-binary person to respond to their 6-year-old cousin asking if I'm a girl or a boy?
A decent approach may be to keep it simple: "I'm still figuring that out", which sounds like a decent summary of where you are at the moment.
Most kids are pretty chill about adults admitting we don'...
- 513
35
votes
How can I handle kids telling me extremely boring stuff?
You don't have to be interested in the subject. Nobody is interested in everything in a conversation. But if you back up a level and think about teaching your kids how to interact with people, that ...
- 1,992
34
votes
I just learned my 15 year old daughter has come out to her friends - should I say anything to her...OR to my wife?
I think Warren Dew offers a good answer there, but if I were in your position I'd want to let my kid immediately that I know about it, that I accept it and that it will never change my love for them (...
- 900
Only top scored, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible