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171 votes
Accepted

How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?

So... I've raced bikes and from my experience, they are probably littering. As much as a race organizer may try to clean up after a race the distance covered and volume of waste generated during a ...
Calvin Smythe's user avatar
125 votes

How to deal with a 6 year old who was "caught" cheating?

You may not like this answer, but bear with me for a moment, please. So first, let’s recap what happened. Your son checked the answers for a test, during the test, in order to correct possible ...
Stephie's user avatar
  • 18.2k
109 votes

How to tell my 4-year-old son not to get hyper with his uncle or anyone except parents?

Kids are going to be kids. There is a lot of social etiquette and nuance that they will learn as they gain experience. Four years old is not the time. You should not place this burden on your child at ...
Ian MacDonald's user avatar
100 votes
Accepted

An incident happened at school and child didn't (want to) tell the parent

My friend obviously did not react well when she found out about the incident. How should she make up for it to her daughter? She should apologize. You say your friend didn't react ideally, I'd say ...
Pascal remembers Monica's user avatar
80 votes
Accepted

What can I tell and what can I ask of a 2nd grade teacher, about my child's health?

Ask yourself: If you were the teacher, would you rather be warned or find yourself suddenly facing a 2nd grader with a full-blown asthma attack? I don't think your request is unreasonable. And you ...
Stephie's user avatar
  • 18.2k
77 votes
Accepted

How should I respond to a 6 year old's dark drawings?

I wouldn't consider that dark. Dark would be every drawing having family members dead or something. Specific to people you know. I used to draw medieval scenes with gruesome atrocities but it was not ...
Kai Qing's user avatar
  • 4,582
77 votes

How to talk to a teen daughter about her weight

Disclaimer: I'm not a parent so I can't speak from personal experience. Also, there seem to be several issues, but the main one is how to talk to her about her weight, so I will cover only that with ...
Anne Daunted GoFundMonica's user avatar
74 votes
Accepted

What do I do about my mom setting her expectations too high?

You have lots of options. Here's one: At dinner one evening, you can say you have a serious announcement. Then tell your mom and dad that you're pregnant. You're really sorry you slipped up, but it ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
68 votes

How do I explain the reasons behind protesting and rioting to my children?

To answer the question as to "why protests turn to riots" it often comes down to people not feeling like they are heard. Think about if you (or your child) is asking for something, something you ...
Becuzz's user avatar
  • 13.3k
60 votes

My 15-year-old son is gay. How do I express my feelings about this?

How do I express my feelings towards him being gay without actually hurting his feelings? Right now, you don't unless he asks. Even then, I'd equivocate ("Give me time to gather my thoughts. This is ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
59 votes
Accepted

How to talk to a teen daughter about her weight

Your daughter is 16 years old. While you're right that she's "under [y]our roof and so [y]our rules", that's not going to last forever; presumably she'll be moving out to go to college (or something ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
58 votes

How to explain intravenous drug abuse to a 6-year-old?

Just be truthful. While the details about chemical addiction may fly over a 6 year old's head, the general idea is really not that hard to understand. Tell them that drugs are chemicals that can make ...
forest's user avatar
  • 847
58 votes

How can I handle a daughter who says she doesn't want to stay with me more than one day?

Well, not like that. Your daughter voiced a perfectly reasonable sentiment (being away from home is disruptive, and some people really don't like disruptions like that). She even tried hard to make ...
Arno's user avatar
  • 3,061
56 votes

My husband, who is my teen daughter's step father feels bad that he can't have a closer relationship with my daughter

Kids love their parents. This is true the vast majority of the time, even when the parent is abusive and manipulative to an extraordinary degree. Therefore it is extremely difficult to form a close ...
MAA's user avatar
  • 3,213
56 votes

How best for a trans/non-binary person to respond to their 6-year-old cousin asking if I'm a girl or a boy?

Six years old is old enough to understand gender in a general sense, and it’s definitely old enough to have an intelligent conversation about the complexities of gender. So my answer is to be honest ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
47 votes

How to answer my 4-year-old asking where she was when I was small and how she got in my tummy?

I tend to think some version of the truth is always best. To deal with this question when my son asked it, I used a fruit analogy: just like apples grow on trees, babies grow in their mommy's tummies; ...
MAA's user avatar
  • 3,213
47 votes

How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?

What's important here is not the "littering" as such but that people are being responsible. I presume you want your son to be a responsible person in general so I'd focus on that and if he isn't too ...
RyanfaeScotland's user avatar
47 votes

How to explain intravenous drug abuse to a 6-year-old?

My general approach is that it's not a good idea to hide the world from your children. Of course I wouldn't go into the gruesome details of drug addiction, but my view is that when I explain this to ...
Sefe's user avatar
  • 596
44 votes
Accepted

How to answer my 4-year-old asking where she was when I was small and how she got in my tummy?

It's difficult to understand what children are actually seeking as an answer when they ask a question such as this. Since parents know the whole story, it's a challenge to tease out just enough ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
42 votes

At what age should I tell my daughter that her real mother is dead?

I cannot really give first-hand advice, never having been in a similar situation. However, I would think the basic approach should be the same as for an adopted child. Basically: don't push ...
sleske's user avatar
  • 2,768
42 votes
Accepted

How can I handle kids telling me extremely boring stuff?

To some degree, kids need you to act interested when you aren't; you can't fully avoid their 'boring' talk without it leaving them feeling unheard or unappreciated. There have already been two great ...
dsollen's user avatar
  • 3,904
39 votes

Disclosing parent separation to all children together or each one separately

I am not sure there is a right answer, but to me, it would make sense to do it together. The reasoning for this is the following: I feel it would be better to have both of you present for the ...
Layna's user avatar
  • 3,099
39 votes
Accepted

How to talk to parents about my mental health

There are some problems common to many parents: parents might think they have a responsibility to fix things, not to feel things with you. Parenting styles differ. Parents with Authoritarian ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
38 votes

How to convince a 4-year old child that professional cyclists are not littering during a race?

I don't see any reason why you should condone this behaviour, even if it is allowed by the authorities. If your child is interested in making sure trash ends up in the appropriate place, or isn't ...
Ian MacDonald's user avatar
37 votes

My husband, who is my teen daughter's step father feels bad that he can't have a closer relationship with my daughter

I have some experience in this area. About 10 years ago I married my wife, whose children were teenagers at the time. A lot of the tension from her divorce was dissolved rather quickly, and there is a ...
Ben Harrison's user avatar
36 votes

How best for a trans/non-binary person to respond to their 6-year-old cousin asking if I'm a girl or a boy?

A decent approach may be to keep it simple: "I'm still figuring that out", which sounds like a decent summary of where you are at the moment. Most kids are pretty chill about adults admitting we don'...
Morgen's user avatar
  • 513
35 votes

How can I handle kids telling me extremely boring stuff?

You don't have to be interested in the subject. Nobody is interested in everything in a conversation. But if you back up a level and think about teaching your kids how to interact with people, that ...
Wayne Conrad's user avatar
  • 1,972
35 votes
Accepted

How can I handle a daughter who says she doesn't want to stay with me more than one day?

I upvoted @Arno's answer because the advice is sound. I'd like to take a different approach. It will sound harsh, but please know I don't mean it to be harsh. I just mean it to hopefully be a better ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
34 votes

I just learned my 15 year old daughter has come out to her friends - should I say anything to her...OR to my wife?

I think Warren Dew offers a good answer there, but if I were in your position I'd want to let my kid immediately that I know about it, that I accept it and that it will never change my love for them (...
DadOfTwo's user avatar
  • 900

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