37

If it is of that much concern to you then the simple answer is: Yes - you should have it as a requirement of the job, either that they already hold a CPR training certificate, or that they will be willing to sit it. But remember, most parents get no training in CPR and manage just fine, so your expectations of a babysitter may need to be tempered a little. ...


18

I don't know that this question is really answerable, because significant injuries or deaths while in the care of babysitters are very, very rare. There aren't enough to really compare adults to immature babysitters from what I found, and further the age will likely not be recorded in most cases where it is an accident (and nobody is charged criminally). ...


14

You and your wife can absolutely handle a baby without Grandparents help, many people have in the past and will in the future. The real question is: Do you want to? Having a baby and caring for a baby is extremely taxing--both physically and mentally. If your wife plans on breastfeeding, she will be feeding every 2-3 hours. If the baby doesn't sleep well,...


14

I am trying to sort if it's reasonable to ask someone to take first aid & CPR training. Of course this will vary depending on local customs, but from a German perspective: Yes, this is totally OK. In Germany, it is common to need a first aid certificate in various cases: for your driver's licence as a certified coach (Übungsleiter or Trainer) in a ...


14

I don't have studies either but I feel it's worth writing a bit even if it's somewhat opinion based. TL;DR: You most probably can outsource all the unpleasant stuff, but then you won't really be the parents. You CAN outsource a huge amount of the unpleasant stuff to a nanny. You can even outsource almost all of it a lot of the upper class/aristocracy used ...


13

If it were me -- (and there are only going to be opinions, no 'answer'), I would take the opportunity to be positive and loving. Show this baby who you really are and teach her to appreciate her family -- all of them. Just keep showing 'them' who you are. Hold your head up. There will always be people who for no good reason, don't like you. You are smarter, ...


11

Curious if this is country-specific. My 15 year old has been sitting for others for 4 years now. The duration and end times have changed, at 11, we weren't going to let her agree to sitting till midnight, for example, but an early dinner for the parents, home by 9PM or so. Even now, she sits for parents of friends whose daughter is the same age, but not ...


11

I think, legal issues aside, that you should tell the nanny. Not because of privacy issues, but because it is more effective as a deterrent of undesired activities if it's in the open than if it's secret. You don't necessarily have to state it upfront as 'We want to watch you', however; you can put it as "We want to be able to see our kids from time to ...


10

Some kids are outgoing. Others, not so much. Some get scared by facial hair. Some get scared when it goes away. I can't say for sure why your niece is nervous around you, but I can take a guess. Most likely, she just isn't familiar with you. She sees grandma pretty often and isn't scared of her. She's seen grandma be nice and loving. I'd also wager ...


10

In my experience, it is when you come home, before the sitter leaves. At that moment you know how long they babysat for and how much extra you owe them for being late (I used to charge double after midnight and double if you're late, so possibly 4x for that last hour.) Bring the right amount of cash home with you if you can, or email them the money while you'...


9

I am a parent who employs a nanny for child caregiving purposes. I believe we pay our nanny a fair market wage, but if she wanted a raise I would want her to ask for a time to sit down with my husband and I (her joint employers) in person other than a time she was scheduled to work. I would want her to have a reasoned explanation why she deserved a raise. ...


8

My daughter has developmental delays (well, more like outright stopping now) due to her cerebral palsy. Pediatricians tend to be much more relaxed than parents on the issue of developmental delays. They field several questions from overly worried mothers every day, that almost always turn out to be nothing. The kind of delays you're talking about are ...


8

Honestly, I think you should do all you can to babysit regardless of what they call you. You yourself can prove that you are more than a babysitter and to children they don't care about names, they care about being loved and wanted. That's all you need to do. This bit is important: ...and I could be grandma but after watching her for a few months now I ...


8

TL:DR: Your plan for a nanny is definitely feasible, but be aware it might not actually be what you (and your partner) want when your child arrives. Ok, I remember this. Right now, you are coming from a childless point of view. A crying/tantrumming child is extremely annoying. Excrement smells bad and babies are just small balls of bodily fluids who wake ...


7

I wouldn't say that is a red flag. There's no way to say for sure if something's wrong, of course, but odds are that your child is experiencing separation anxiety, which is very common at that age and typically comes and goes over the next several years (they'll have higher anxiety for a few months, then less, then more again). Basically, your child ...


6

Unasked-for advice is tricky. No one can see what you see and know the parents like you do. If you really believe the twins are delayed developmentally, I personally feel it's not only ok but ethically responsible to approach the parents, but not with just your dis-ease about the situation. I would suggest that you start by doing some solid research. Find ...


6

The NSPCC (UK child protection charity) recommends that no-one under the age of 16 is used as a babysitter. If a person under the age of 16 is used as a babysitter the parents of the child, and not the babysitter, remain responsible for any harm that happens to the child. http://www.eastsussex.gov.uk/childrenandfamilies/childcare/default1.htm Here's an ...


6

This is probably too late now, but I wanted to add another option in hopes you still have a chance to make a difference. This child needs professional counseling. The parents have no interest in obtaining it. However, their ability to maintain their standard of living depends on a babysitter. In other words, if you are really willing to leave, they need you ...


6

Every child is babysittable. There's no special magic to raising a kid that's easier or harder to babysit. All of the other things you're hopefully doing anyway to raise a child who is able to function normally in society will help here; and every child will have their hard days. What you're missing is that babysitting is a skilled profession. Yes, there'...


5

I would inform said nanny first. Like Joe said, it would act as a deterrent. Deterring or attempting to prevent a bad action by the nanny is much better than having to clean up any mess she might make with the children or the house, be it emotional distress on the children's part or an actual filthy mess in the house. While people desire everyone to have ...


5

While routine may have benefits, the most important thing is to make sure the child gets plenty of sleep. A lot of children who have older siblings end up with no routine because their "schedule" is arranged around those of their older brothers and sisters. My older child had a routine at this age, but when the second one came along, the kids would not ...


5

That really depends on your babies and where you feel they would best thrive. I would pick a place based on which one exposes your babies to other children and has the higher caregiver to child ratio. That way, your babies will get the benefits of being exposed to other babies/children (important not only for psychosocial reasons but also medically for ...


5

Ask yourself why you babysit, what you get out of it. Make a list if need be. Some of it will be positives, such as being able to see your granddaugther, others will be negatives such as seeing the way her parents treat you. Some of these points will be way more important than others. Should you decide that the negatives are too much, there are more options ...


5

Speaking from my experience having a nanny for my 4 kids, I can tell you that a week is not enough time to find out if your child will bond with your nanny. It IS enough time though for you to observe her with your child and gauge whether or not you feel comfortable with your choice and are willing to let her continue to care for your child. I’m assuming of ...


4

It doesn't so much matter what we think, it matters what your wife thinks, and it sounds like she'll be happiest and most comfortable giving birth and learning to care for an infant with her mother's help. When you become a parent you learn you have to sacrifice a lot of your own wants in favor of the best interests of your child and his/her mother, and ...


4

am not finding anyone I am completely happy with First of all, you will never be happy with any sitter. The parent usually has some ideas on how to raise the kid and the biggest problem here is that the sitter is not you. I am trying to sort if it's reasonable to ask someone to take first aid & CPR training In theory, you have the right to ask ...


4

I don't personally love the idea of 'training' all children to not express what is basically a biologically natural behavior-- staying near an adult after dark to ensure their survival and protection from predators is a 100% normal human infant behavior. Some babies seem to take to behavioral modifications more easily and comfortably than others, and sleep ...


3

I say it depends on how much you know and or trust the teen or person in charge. I have been watching my little cousins from the ages of a few months old; first, it started out with my aunts or uncles around then I was able to watch them for short periods on my on and now I watch them for hours on in. I started when I was about 11 or so and been doing it ...


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