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106

Kids that age learn a lot by imaginative play. It's how they make sense of the world and experiment with different responses to events. Pretending to be an adult is very common. Playing along is a good opportunity to show empathy and teach better responses. You might say, I'm Eric. I'm sad because I couldn't find my toy. I wonder if I should cry or ask ...


80

Babies cry. Maybe it helps to know what an infant's 'normal" crying pattern is. Fuss/cry durations peak in the first 2 months (peaking average: 6 weeks), are highest in evenings, and decrease approximately 50% by 12 weeks of age. So, the first two months are the worst. Also, not all infants are alike; some are very compliant, some are very persistent, and ...


59

Your daughter is exhibiting self-soothing behavior, usually more pronounced when the child is tired or falling asleep. From the AAP's healthychildren.org page on common childhood habits: Their repetitive nature suggests that they serve a soothing or calming process for the brain. Interestingly, even in adulthood many people cling to some of these self-...


54

If you want to do what is best for your baby, then you should be talking to her pretty much all the time, except when she's asleep. So yes, talk to her when she cries; your voices will let her know she's being heard. Please know that she heard you talking when she was in your uterus. Although the sound is a bit different now, the cadence, rhythm, etc., are ...


53

This is a difficult problem for parents because we hate making our children cry, but it seems to me that you use 'the naughty place' / timeout and that can be effective. I don't call it 'the naughty place'. As difficult as it is when your child cries, sometimes it is your job to be firm. At two, she is trying to assert herself. This is a normal part of ...


47

Babies are not good at figuring out what is bothering them -- simply that something is. Being tired, in particular, leads to a general crankiness that is difficult to alleviate. Since your son doesn't really understand that simply falling asleep will help him feel better if he's tired, he starts "complaining" in general. I am unhappy. It must be the way I'...


35

You can not spoil a young baby. Being born is a very discomforting experience: the world is cold and full of harsh lights and loud noises. The only comfort you know as a baby is being fed or cuddled. Also, when babies grow older and develop, they discover new things all the time, which they do not understand and might confuse them, also leading to ...


27

It tells just how much he sees you as role model. Instead of seeing this as abnormal you should be the role model he deserves. Other than that do understand that this behaviour will stop after some time. You only need to worry if this does not stop and causes complications. Hope I helped. P.S.: When I was a child I used to wear my father's army uniform. ...


25

First of all, to kids that age it's all "big stuff." It makes them sad to not get their way, and crying is how they express their sadness. If I suddenly discovered a way to make my children not want to cry in the first place, I don't think I would use it. That being said, at best crying forces everyone around you to give excessive attention to you and ...


23

I just want to share a slightly different perspective on this one. I totally agree with Karl that its "all big stuff" and that handling things "the nice way" is usually going to work best for you. However, I want to offer a perspective I don't already see here: For any social human (which is really all of us) a big part of our psychological validation ...


21

One of the main reasons a newborn (particularly such a new newborn!) dislikes diaper changes is the fact that they're cold. Really cold. Normally they have this nice warm layer on them that keeps them warm and cozy, and you're ripping that off of them with nary a care for their ... well, I'm sure that's what the newborn thinks, anyway. To avoid this, you ...


17

Blowing on the face is a common trick. It triggers a reflex to hold the breath for a short moment. That stops the crying, and can also be used when washing the child's face etc. I am not aware of any consequences of this, neither positive nor negative.


16

Pacifiers aren't magic. If something else is bothering a baby, a pacifier only calms them for a short while. This is useful, for example, if you need a baby to calm down for a few minutes while you fix a bottle, but you have to address the underlying need in short order or the baby just spits the pacifier out and gets madder than ever. On plane trips, ...


16

I'd suggest you just try it. Whatever works, works. You'll notice soon enough what makes her calm down, and what doesn't. I don't think there are rules to this, and not all babies respond to exactly the same things, even though some things generally work better than others. A lot depends on why the baby is crying. If she's hungry, most likely nothing except ...


15

We mostly only ask one of our children to stop crying, and that's because he will literally keep going for hours if we don't. Most children get it out of their systems in a couple minutes and move on, at least for crying about something that happened in the past and is done, not an ongoing condition like being tired or sick. At a certain point, crying ...


14

This is an interesting article on the topic: http://www.secretsofbabybehavior.com/2010/05/why-do-some-babies-hate-being-drowsy.html The article has this to say on why some babies hate being drowsy: -The Drowsy State: Babies move in and out of 6 different "states" or moods: crying, irritable, quiet alert, drowsy, active sleep, and quiet sleep. You ...


14

Yup, it's normal. Basically, he feels rubbish because he's tired. So he's struggling and crying because he doesn't know how to stop feeling rubbish, and is trying to find a non-rubbish position. But he likes being held, so when you put him down, that's worse. It doesn't help that for small children, sleep is basically terrifying. One second you're being ...


13

First, you are not withholding comfort. You are allowing them to express themselves in a way which requires them to handle the issue without forming a dependency. Being comforting is not the same thing for every child and every situation. For relatives, they likely have children. That being the case, I'd ask them if any 2 of the children were able to be ...


13

It sounds like what you have is a breakdown in communication. It's especially difficult around this age since she is trying to make use of her newly acquired language skills. Look at it from her point of view. — "I want your phone." — "No, this is mine!" That response eliminates all common ground. What other recourse does she have but to throw a ...


13

"If my wife will not allow her to do so, she will keep crying and crying without stop." Sadly, I fear that this may be indicative that she has learnt that by crying, she can have her way; and I would be willing to bet that when she keeps crying you eventually give in and let her play with the hair - re-asserting the behaviour. While crying can be ...


12

We carry lots of evolutionary baggage with us. For millions of years, children have been sitting on their mothers' hips all day. Lying around somewhere on their own for a lengthy period of time would mean they had been left behind in the high grass of the savanna. The only way for children to survive this would have been to be loud enough to be heard by ...


12

I'm not a parent myself, but two points: 1) You could argue that no, it's not just 'cute'. Imagining yourself in someone else's position is the very basis of empathy and all that is worthwhile in humanity :-) 2) Describing himself in the third person, from the POV of you or someone else, can sometimes be a mechanism to put distance between himself and ...


11

Crying at drop-off and pick-up is more of a separation anxiety issue, and it's totally normal. It has nothing to do with whether she likes daycare. What you really need to know is whether she cries throughout the day, or if the crying is limited to a brief period at drop off and pick up. I used to sneak in to daycare at the end of the day and see my son ...


10

If you are blowing softly, it could hardly harm the child. Anything under x knots should be fine, where x is a reasonable value determined by humourless scientists.


10

Some kids are outgoing. Others, not so much. Some get scared by facial hair. Some get scared when it goes away. I can't say for sure why your niece is nervous around you, but I can take a guess. Most likely, she just isn't familiar with you. She sees grandma pretty often and isn't scared of her. She's seen grandma be nice and loving. I'd also wager ...


10

I think you're right in your concerns about confusing your baby. It's a good idea to wait until you get back from your trip to start sleep training unless you are going the "Extinction with parental presence" route (which is not consistent with CIO). As an alternative to CIO, there is "Ferberizing", which is far more work for the parents but maybe better ...


9

Right around 15 months, according to the book The Wonder Weeks, comes Mental Leap 9. The authors of The Wonder Weeks describe mental leaps as the bounds in development your child makes where he goes from one way of understanding the world to another, more mature and adult-like way of understanding it. As your child ages his leaps build on each other and he ...


9

There's a difference between an emotion and its expression. Crying in children is a social signal, "I need someone urgently to fix my problem." Parents who tell their children not to cry about something aren't telling them it's not okay to feel that emotion, they are telling them, "This is not something that requires the urgent degree of other people's ...


9

I'm at a loss as to why he's crying in the morning, when he apparently really likes it there. Because toddlers are highly compressed balls of contradictory emotions which change on a dime and all of which feel unbelievably intense to them. In that moment I am sure that's exactly what he feels: he wants to stay with you. So he cries. Then shortly after you'...


9

She is an infant. At this point she knows two things: I am content, I am not content. If the baby is crying soothe it. If that means talking, talk. If that means touching, touch. You will quickly understand your child. At this stage there are no tantrums. The baby doesn't understand much of anything. You will not spoil her by picking her up or talking to her....


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