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I have been living with my wife's family for a while both before and after the birth of my kid, and my mother-in-law feels like she is right about everything.

My wife is also a way of nagging what she thinks is right and I think it's very annoying when you they keep proving you wrong. Her grandma just pops in room in middle of night or early morning if baby start crying, which again in my opinion is very foolish and invading privacy.

Same issue is with her brothers too, they just keep on talking like my wife isn't taking care of the baby. Is the environment toxic or do they want to own the baby's life?

I feel I don't have control of being the baby's dad and I am losing control. Hence the question, how to stop grandparents from being overprotective?

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  • I assume not living with them isn't possible? Commented Jan 6, 2016 at 9:09
  • @RichardDalton it is, it's just for the time being I have been moved with them.
    – localhost
    Commented Jan 6, 2016 at 10:04
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    It doesn't sound like they are overprotective, I would call that controlling. Unfortunately, by moving into their home you have put yourself in a situation where they are able to exert control. Moving out may be the only way to stop this. Perhaps if you told them you do not feel you and your wife are able to have privacy while in their house, so you must move out, and you seriously start moving out, they will change. But do not count on it. I think you will just have to endure until you can move out. You have no way of making them change. Commented Jan 6, 2016 at 23:07
  • @FrancineDeGroodTaylor +1 for that, they would still try to control the my kids as my Mrs is like them and she thinks they are right and try to spend time with her family. I was thinking of moving far the better. Why would they control at first place? It has put strain on me and my relationship with my wife as she is too much inclined toward her family.
    – localhost
    Commented Jan 18, 2016 at 1:39

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Well this is a poopy situation no matter how you cut it...so sorry. And I'm guessing the answers you're going to get aren't going to be all that encouraging either...again, sorry.

I had an over bearing in-law and didn't even live with them...and it still sucked. I felt like they wanted MY baby every time I was around them. It was hurtful and made me feel inadequate as a young mother. And just an FYI, it probably won't change once you move out either, it'll just get easier to avoid/ignore.

So here is what I did: I learned to ignore it. It was a great lesson in patience and forgiving. I mean, honestly, what else can you do? The only control you have over this situation right now is how YOU CHOOSE TO REACT/RESPOND. By this I mean, don't let it cause tension between you and your partner, don't let it stress out the children and don't let it get into your head. It's temporary. Breathe, Breathe, Breathe.

Good luck!

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  • +100 for "The only control you have over this situation right now is how YOU CHOOSE TO REACT/RESPOND." When they tell you something you can just say "Thank you for the information" and do what you want.
    – user7678
    Commented Mar 27, 2016 at 14:16

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