My kids (grades 2 and 4) are very bright and very active. The traditional school setting does not seem to be working for them. This is evident by their perpetual visits to the principal's office for disrupting the class and comments from the teacher about them not paying attention. After speaking with the teacher about what they are doing in class, I think they are bored. They don't like school. I don't want school to be a long, hard road for them. Any suggestions?
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8If bright and active kids naturally disrupt classes, my school was full of genius athletes.– tenpnCommented Mar 30, 2011 at 14:54
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9@tenpn: All bananas are yellow. Hence the sun is a banana.– Lennart RegebroCommented Mar 30, 2011 at 20:18
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2You could homeschool them. Worked well for me.– gahooaCommented Nov 13, 2012 at 17:21
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3Not enough information here. Dozen different parents could write the same question, yet the problem could be different for each of their children, and would require a different solution. Some children are bored because they are bright. Some children are bored because they are dumb. Some children have medical problems. Some children need more physical activities in their free time. Some children are computer-game addicts and become aggressive when they have to turn off the computers. Some children are so concerned with a problem outside of school (e.g. in family) that they can't focus. Etc.– Viliam BúrCommented Jan 10, 2013 at 11:54
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1@GorchestopherH, if you have to listen five more times to the same excruciating explanation of something you understood the first time it was explained, you will be bored. That was the experience one of my children had in elementary (primary) math.– aparente001Commented May 9, 2015 at 4:22
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6 Answers
Hah this is a really good and old question.
Let me tell you something else first...
School for a bright kid is not about teaching. And not about learning because if he is as bright and vivid as you say he will learn everything himself.
A school for a child like him, is about learning the hard way in life unfortunately. It is about learning discipline. It is about learning to pay attention even if you are bored as hell, because you wont get by in life without a good concentration skill..
Of course they are bored. School is boring. And flat. And destructive. What you as parent can do is... assure your kid that it will get better. Assure him that he is smart. Don't pressure him to bring home good grades. Just tell him to learn how to pay attention. Make a game out of it.
Tell him if he pays attention, let him map how the teacher walks in the class. What words he / she uses. Create a challenge for him. Create a quest for knowledge for him that he finds interesting.
BUT!! Make sure he studies never the less. Then he must be creative at home. He has to utilize his skills other ways. Show him piano. Show him interesting stuff like physics. Show him the world and he will like it.
Now... You could switch school, you could get a personal teacher and so on and so forth. That depends on how much you have to spend on school. But if not, then do the above and he should be fine, although he will always rebel a bit. :)
EDIT:
As per Lennart Regebro's comment i'd like to add this link:
http://school.familyeducation.com/home-schooling/human-relations/56224.html
It's an article about home schooling vs real schools.
I never said that doing a good homeschooling is bad for a child. But it depends on the parents Time, Money, and Resourcefulness if he can afford it.
I empathize that if you can then YES you should switch to a school more challenging or homeschooling or personal teacher.
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6@Carmi: The socializing in school is a destructive zero-sum game. I'm not sure it's a good thing to learn it. And studies doesn't show that home-schooled kids have any social problems. I think this answer would be better if it emphasized that the best thing to do is to GET THE KID OUT OF THAT SCHOOL. But that may not be possible. There may be no better school around that you can afford. And homeschooling is often no alternative. And then these recommendations are good. Commented Apr 1, 2011 at 10:45
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1True. They are. I don't even understand this anymore. There are sooo many beautiful things in the world. How can it be, that most teachers make you hate them. Like poetry. Literature. Reading. Writing. Physics. Art.. And you will hate these when you finish school. :( It's just sad really. :(– HannibalCommented Apr 1, 2011 at 13:20
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1"A school for a child like him, is about learning the hard way in life unfortunately." Strong, STRONG disagree. It might be true that school will accomplish that. But that's certainly not what school is, or should be about. If that's what a parent thinks their child is going to get out of school, I think they should have a long think over whether those specific goals are really worth 12 years of boredom and frustration. I agree with your basic message that you've got to cope with what you've got, but the implication that such a situation is ideal or even OK is distasteful to me.– ZivCommented Apr 3, 2011 at 9:12
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1@Hannibal: A good reason for a downvote are the simplictic assumptions in this answer. (All schools are the same, evil. All bored children are bored because they are geniuses.) Well, sometimes it is true, and sometimes it is not. I am a fan of homeschooling in general, but if you try it, you may find out the hard way that the teachers were not as stupid as you thought, and that it is really difficult to make your child interested in something else than e.g. video games. You may find that talking about things is fun, but at the end your child remembers nothing. Etc. Children are different. Commented Jan 10, 2013 at 12:03
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1Good answer. Excellent point about learning discipline. Unfortunately most children who may or may not have had any kind of above average aptitude will end up being completely unremarkable compared to children who learn discipline and professionalism. Commented Dec 21, 2015 at 14:30
If you have some time to spend teaching your children yourself, and you have some money you could contribute towards their education, you could look into a homeschool co-op, or a part-time homeschool-curriculum based private school. These are both significantly cheaper than traditional private schools, and might offer an environment in which your children could move at a faster pace than other kids in the class in academic areas where they are strong.
With a co-op, you find other parents that want to homeschool or use a homeschool curriculum, but you pool money together to pay a teacher for several families. This is usually a 2 or 3 day a week thing, then you do additional work and extracurricular activities with them yourself the other days.
If this is an option for you, I would highly recommend seeking out a program or teacher that is familiar with the Classical Education system of teaching. My two older kids who are school aged have learned with this system, and we are very satisfied with the results.
To bring the discussion back to your question, ultimately we've found that when our kids are in a smaller classroom (7-8 kids max) and are learning with the Classical Education model, they are never bored and are noticeably excelling in all academic areas each year. They love school, and are excited about learning. In a class setting, students can move at different paces on certain subjects. For example, when my oldest son was in 4th grade, there was a kid in his class who was doing 9th grade math.
In public schools, my oldest son was bored and never challenged. He constantly came home with worksheets geared towards helping him pass a standardized test (which ultimately is more about the school than my child, but that's another discussion).
If you want to find out more about Classical Education, there is a good book called The Well-Trained Mind.
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1Thanks for that Javid. I like the idea of sharing a teacher. Now to rally my friends!– nGiniusCommented Apr 2, 2011 at 3:15
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Great Answer! I would add that in many of the States there are also virtual schools that are often categorized as public charter schools and are free as a public school would be as well as often offer up at least one "community day" or co-op day along with the program. www.k12.com is one that is almost nation wide but there are many others based on a more local basis as well. Commented Jul 23, 2012 at 3:57
I suggest reading at least the first chapter of "Have Space Suit, Will Travel" by Robert A. Heinlein (the rest of the book is a bit entertaining, if dated, but the first chapter is pure gold). The suggestions there are more for high school students than grammar school students, but the philosophy is the same:
Public school is crap. Especially for bright students. Find other things they can learn to occupy their time, preferably subjects they want to learn. Tell him to read the whole textbook instead of sticking to the parts the curriculum says to stick to, for starters. Then start feeding him classics like Edgar Rice Borroughs (trust me, he's old enough for these - I was at 7), Johan David Wyss, Arthur Conan Doyle, and Robert Louis Stevenson. This high adventure stuff has 9 year old boy written all over it.
Also, he needs to know not to be a snob about being smarter than the other kids or learning faster than the school wants him to. That just leads to trouble. If all this is truly because he's really bored in class, he can crack open War and Peace or a high school math textbook. The teacher won't bother him at all then.
Alternatively, your kid isn't as bright as you think he is, but I doubt that (parents usually know for certain about that before the kid turns 5). I for one, was never disruptive in class. I just felt held back by what the curriculum offered.
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1I like this answer. If leaving the school is not an option, then encouraging his kids to find ways of entertaining themselves in a non-disruptive manner when they have finished their work is an important skill. I constantly kept books with me at school because I always finished my work early, but I knew better than to be sent home with a note saying I'd been disruptive in class. If reading isn't his deal, then a Suddoku book might be or a small logic puzzle book that he could work on in class. Commented Nov 12, 2012 at 15:08
If your child is "gifted" you can try looking up AEGUS (the Association for the Education of the Gifted and Underserved Student) for help advocating for a better situation to suit your child's particular needs as well as educational opportunities about how these kids need a different kind of educational environment than they are often given and how to best help them at home whether you are helping by supplementing a curriculum from a mortar and brick setting or you take them home for homeschooling.
I also see mention of homeschooling quite a bit above. In addition to co-ops and the like, there are charter schools that are really organizations that help you school at home. They often offer a community of support, days and field trips that include chances for kids to get together for cool activities or even to become involved in a school team or choir if the community is large enough. Sometimes they do this all for free under the umbrella of being a public charter school. www.k12.com is one that operates internationally and is free in most of the States, but it isn't the only program (its just most would be a lot more localized). Keywords like "virtual schools," "free home-education," and "public learning centers" (plus the name of your region) should yield resources for your area. Using this type of system has worked really well for us so far - Mine was reading in third grade and in the fall of her kindergarten year was tested as reading and comprehending at about a 4th - 5th grade level (depending on the test results trusted).
If HS interests you as an option, this answer addresses both common concerns and common problems with homeschooling and has a few articles at the end you can look up for more information about HS studies, options, etc.
answered Jul 23, 2012 at 3:52
How do you know that they are stuck in a boring school? In particular I want to point out the word "stuck". Could they attend a different school?
You could help them to get extra education at home. Did you consider home schooling? You could also try putting them in front of http://www.khanacademy.org and seeing what happens
The Montessori method is something you may want to consider, as well. You can check to see if there are any Montessori schools nearby.
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2Stuck = only one school in the community, no other options within walking distance– nGiniusCommented Nov 12, 2012 at 22:15
One thing that's not clear from the question is whether you are using the school as a free day care while you are at work or otherwise not available to supervise your children yourself.
If not, you can reduce their hours.
Now, what if you need them to be there? "If leaving the school is not an option, then encouraging his kids to find ways of entertaining themselves in a non-disruptive manner when they have finished their work is an important skill. I constantly kept books with me at school because I always finished my work early, but I knew better than to be sent home with a note saying I'd been disruptive in class. If reading isn't his deal, then a Suddoku book might be or a small logic puzzle book that he could work on in class." Some children can't concentrate on something like that with so much going on around them.
The short answer is to tell the teacher, in response to complaints of disruptiveness, "Keep him busy. Give him plenty of work to do that challenges him." Since it is not likely she's going to take the time to design additional worksheets for your child, you may want to send in some materials you have selected yourself.
Take a look at the lists of accommodations recommended for children with ADHD. I'm not saying your children are ADHD, I'm just saying that some of those accommodations are GREAT! I hope your lines of communication with the teacher are open enough that you can get some of those accommodations implemented -- either informally or formally through a 504 plan (you could say that it's for Executive Function).
I don't have of those lists handy, so I'll give you a similar one written for children with Tourette Syndrome. http://teacherweb.com/NY/ValleyStream13/howellroadpbis/CatalogOfAccomidations.pdf
There's some stuff in here you can skip over, but there's also a lot of great ideas for active children (who tend to be the square peg in elementary schools).
Try to get more dynamic teachers for next year.
