Timeline for How can we get some free time (on daily basis)?
Current License: CC BY-SA 4.0
25 events
| when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Jul 5, 2018 at 12:47 | comment | added | Marisa | @DavidMulder Every two weeks. | |
| Jul 4, 2018 at 2:30 | comment | added | Kami | @Douglas There is NO scientific evidence that formula is less healthy than breast milk. Formula-fed babies may be more likely to pick up minor infections, but nobody knows why - could easily be because of careless preparation. Expressing milk is not in mother's (or baby's) interest if she's already at breaking point; it can be exhausting and degrading. However she wants to feed: breast, pumping, formula, all are just as good health wise. What will impact negatively on her baby's health is if she is so emotionally beat down by something she feels she 'has' to do she can't bond with him. | |
| Jul 2, 2018 at 19:30 | comment | added | Pascal remembers Monica | @Douglas: Sure. I know about the officially right way to feed babies. Do all the pumping you can. Feed them breast-milk for as long as you want to. My point is that if you can also feed the baby from a bottle, mom gets a rest, and at least in our case, formula made our babies sleep for a bit longer, giving us both a bit more rest. We fed our first baby mostly mother's milk for a long time. Babies fed on mother's milk are supposed to develop less allergies later on, for example. We used more formula with the twins. Care to guess who has allergies now, and who doesn't? | |
| Jul 2, 2018 at 19:12 | comment | added | Douglas | I disagree strongly with the suggestion of formula. It is much less healthy than breastmilk in ways that go far beyond simple nutrition. You would be paying a lot more for a vastly inferior product. Bottled breastmilk (pumped by the mom, not bought from other people) could work and would be much better, but even that would be missing some health benefits that come from nursing directly at the source. | |
| Jul 1, 2018 at 7:29 | comment | added | Stephie♦ | As SIDS was discussed: We also tried hard to get our first to sleep on his back, which he thoroughly and vehemently disliked. In our sleep-deprived state, we didn’t realize that if both parents prefer to sleep on their tummy, there might be a hereditary preference... We ultimately decided to minimize the risk by eliminating all other risk factors and thus lower the total risk to a (for us) acceptable level. Was the same for no. 2 - we tried it, failed and gave up (sooner this time). Raising a baby also means to learn what your individual child needs. | |
| Jul 1, 2018 at 2:31 | comment | added | kuhl | @ThinkTank I know you say you can't outsource groceries. I'm not sure where you live, but grocery stores are beginning to offer free or cheap pickup and delivery. For example, I live in the Midwest US. Here, the local grocery chain will deliver for free if the order is large enough, otherwise I believe it costs $5. The big blue chain also now offers free grocery pickup in my area. We have used these to save on shopping time. Instead of packing the kids in the car and wandering the aisles, we order online while they're napping and then one of us picks it up on the way home from work. | |
| Jun 30, 2018 at 12:48 | comment | added | David Mulder | @Marisa biweekly as in "appearing or taking place every two weeks" or as in "appearing or taking place twice a week"? | |
| Jun 30, 2018 at 2:12 | comment | added | Kevin McKenzie | Babies sleeping with their butts in the air is normal. Weird, but normal. And the idea is that if you put them to sleep on their back, once they can roll over by themselves, they're less at risk of SIDS. But up until they can, the AAP still recommends putting babies to sleep on their backs. You're right, they don't know why SIDS happens, but they do know that putting babies to sleep on their stomachs is correlated with a said baby dying of SIDS. Yes, the risk is small, but if you're one of the unlucky ones, wouldn't you much rather not have done something known to correlate with SIDS? | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 21:46 | comment | added | Wildcard | The only part of this answer I disagree with is about using baby formula. Most powdered baby formula is utterly disgusting. Try it yourself before you give it to your baby. (My son was fed on breast milk and home-made barley formula for babies; he was a month premature but is now big for his age (5) and very strong. Similac just made him cry; we switched after a couple months and he slept much better and was less fussy.) | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 20:32 | comment | added | Pascal remembers Monica | @Walt: Yes, we were taught the same thing. It supposedly reduces the risk of SIDS by a measurable factor (how large depends on the sources you trust). But that's exactly what I mean: We wanted to do everything the right way. When our son wanted to sleep on his stomach and knees, with his butt sticking up in the air (really!), we worried and put him on his back again. We also worried about a ton of other things, which, looking back, are really rather ridiculous. The risk of an infant dying from SIDS in the US is about 1 in 1000, and and risk reduction strategies are based on correlations only. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 20:10 | comment | added | user32494 | @Walt in the new parent classes I've taken, they say that is an outdated way of thinking. The big thing is to make sure there is nothing that can wrap around their face (blankets, sheets, certain clothes, etc). Opinions on stuff like that seem to change every couple weeks. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 20:00 | comment | added | Tin Wizard | Point 4 is good, but I feel the need to point out that in our "new parent" classes (~3 years ago) we were told, forcefully and unequivocally, that the baby must sleep on its back. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:50 | comment | added | ThinkTank | @Pascal Actually we could afford it, it's just that we're still in a bit anxious mood ('nobody can take care of our baby better than we do' :) | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:41 | comment | added | Pascal remembers Monica | @ThinkTank: You're welcome, and hang in there. My answer assumed you don't have much financial resources to spend because of the nanny not being an option, but if you do, there's another way to get some time off: Put the baby in day care for one afternoon per week. That might be difficult because of the availability of free slots and waiting lists (so by the time you get a slot, you might not need it any more), but if there are day care centers where you live, it might not hurt to ask... | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:34 | comment | added | ThinkTank | @KlaymenDK We already partially outsource laundry, unfortunately we can't do it for the groceries (it would be a real blessing though). | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:29 | comment | added | Pascal remembers Monica | @KlaymenDK: Regarding point 1, I thought so too when we had our first child. Then came the twins when our oldest was not quite 2 yet, and the miracle happened and we had time to take care of all 3 of them. Then number 4 came along a few years later and again, enough time to keep them all alive. For me, that means that Parkinson's law also applies to babies: The work you have with a baby expands to fill all available time. So try to consciously reserve a free hour now and then. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:29 | vote | accept | ThinkTank | ||
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:29 | comment | added | ThinkTank | @Marisa Thanks, I hope you're right about a leap :). Yeah, I think a cleaning service is going to be money well spent | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:29 | comment | added | ThinkTank | @Pascal Thank you for your kind words. My wife cares a lot about the house so I believe we'll try a housekeeper + 'take turns' combo. We're still in a 'want everything perfect' phase but we have to loosen up a bit :) | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:21 | comment | added | KlaymenDK | Especially points 3 and 4 -- I don't think point 1 is feasible for many parents. As @Marisa said, outsource what you can (afford): primarily cleaning, but also groceries and laundry if possible (depends on your location I guess). | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:13 | history | edited | Pascal remembers Monica | CC BY-SA 4.0 |
deleted 41 characters in body
|
| Jun 29, 2018 at 14:05 | history | edited | Pascal remembers Monica | CC BY-SA 4.0 |
added 34 characters in body
|
| Jun 29, 2018 at 13:15 | comment | added | Marisa | Also consider hiring a biweekly cleaning service to help keep things in check around the house; we got one before I gave birth, and it took a huge load of stress and time off my back. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 13:15 | comment | added | Marisa | Tagging onto this to say that as the mother of a 4 month old, you're going to see a HUGE leap in terms of the baby's growth and ability to play and be independent in the next month. Our daughter is just getting to be fun, and we're finding ways to unwind with her. For example, a nightly walk together is part of her bedtime routine, so we get some exercise, get out of the house, and can talk about non baby things as she's too busy looking at the world going by. | |
| Jun 29, 2018 at 12:26 | history | answered | Pascal remembers Monica | CC BY-SA 4.0 |