In my opinion there are far more bad parts in these fairy tales than just stealing: evil stepmothers, witches who eat children, people dying horrific deaths (mostly for punishments)... If such stories were published today, it is likely that they would not be recommended for children. Should you read them to your children anyway? Absolutely. (And I say this as one of those who never were very fond of fairy tales as a child.)

By the age in which children are able to judge what's happening in those stories, they should be old enough to understand that those are stories, that they come from a time long ago, and that they are set in the time back then. There are no giants and witches, and people are not put into kegs into which nails have been driven from the outside and rolled down hills for punishment anymore.

Plus, there are times and places where we would consider stealing fine. (Stealing weapons from an enemy is usually considered a brave deed–and rarely ever even called "stealing"–and if a well-known thieve is stolen from, we'd snicker about it.) Scientific studies have shown that practically everyone lies several times a day without even thinking about it. And even when we do think about it, there is what we call "white lies", and they are important. (Just tell the next mother who proudly holds up her newborn how her child really looks with all those wrinkles on a bald, red head.)

If you tell your child to not to ever to lie or steal, then you put it into a moral dilemma, because it hears you preaching an absolute moral standard that you do not live up to. And this is fine, because your child will constantly run into those while living with other people. That's just the way our society is knit. The moral standards that rule our societies are far more complex than "do this, don't do that" and they are hard to learn. But all children will have to learn these standards in order to be able to live in their society, and the only way to learn about these rules is to be exposed to them, will all their dilemmas and discrepancies. Help your child to navigate this complex subject, but do not try to prevent it from being exposed to it.

In my opinion there are far more bad parts in these fairy tales than just stealing: evil stepmothers, witches who eat children, people dying horrific deaths (mostly for punishments)... If such stories were published today, it is likely that they would not be recommended for children. Should you read them to your children anyway? Absolutely. (And I say this as one of those who never were very fond of fairy tales as a child.)

By the age in which children are able to judge what's happening in those stories, they should be old enough to understand that those are stories, that they come from a time long ago, and that they are set in the time back then. There are no giants and witches, and people are not put into kegs into which nails have been driven from the outside and rolled down hills for punishment anymore.

Plus, there are times and places where we would consider stealing fine. (Stealing weapons from an enemy is usually considered a brave deed–and rarely ever even called "stealing"–and if a well-known thieve is stolen from, we'd snicker about it.) Scientific studies have shown that practically everyone lies several times a day without even thinking about it. And even when we do think about it, there is what we call "white lies", and they are important. (Just tell the next mother who proudly holds up her newborn how her child really looks with all those wrinkles on a bald, red head.)

If you tell your child to not to ever to lie or steal, then you put it into a moral dilemma, because it hears you preaching an absolute moral standard that you do not live up to. And this is fine, because your child will constantly run into those while living with other people. That's just the way our society is knit. The moral standards that rule our societies are far more complex than "do this, don't do that" and they are hard to learn. But all children will have to learn these standards in order to be able to live in their society, and the only way to learn about these rules is to be exposed to them, will all their dilemmas and discrepancies. Help your child to navigate this complex subject, but do not try to prevent it from being exposed to it.