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69 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

Your parents are being lenient I'm not sure where you live, but in the State of NJ, the penalties for underage drinking are a fine between $500-$1,000 and imprisonment for up to 6 months. You've ...
Pyrotechnical's user avatar
30 votes

"I want to do that on my own" - how to improve situation if they don't actually *do* it?

I'm pretty sure my mother could have written the same question about me when I was your daughter's age (which was quite a while ago). Specifically when it comes to the morning routine, we eventually ...
Arno's user avatar
  • 3,061
18 votes

"I want to do that on my own" - how to improve situation if they don't actually *do* it?

You've clearly put a lot of thought into this and are exploring varied options as to how to support your child through this. Great parenting all around. However, I'm noticing that all the options you ...
Flater's user avatar
  • 1,485
16 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

TL;DR Your parents are not being unreasonable or cruel. It's okay to disagree with their opinion but it would be unfair to consider them to be bad parents because of this. For the purpose of the ...
Flater's user avatar
  • 1,485
10 votes
Accepted

Advanced Placement and Honors classes

Your daughter is in high school, so the correct answer is that she should do what she wants to do, with some guidance from you. "Let" is definitely the wrong word here! She's old enough to ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
7 votes

How to make 11 years old kid do homework

First: please always take comments about self-harm or suicide seriously. They may not be serious now, but that doesn't mean they won't eventually be. Look into resources for parents to understand ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
6 votes

Our teenage son doesn't like eating because he "doesn't want to be like us"

I'm answering this in spite of my belief that this is a question seeking medical advice because maybe it might be helpful. You haven't said why the two of you (parents) are prediabetic. If it is due ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
6 votes

How to tackle teenage arrogance

To summarise the relevant points from the discussion: The student is studying the arts. The parents have a science background. Something Richard Feynman said is relevant here. I haven't got it to ...
Paul Johnson's user avatar
  • 10.4k
5 votes

How to tackle teenage arrogance

The arrogance of inexperience is a core feature of the teenage years, and has been since the dawn of human history. As much as it may both worry and irritate you, it's probably counterproductive to ...
Chris Sunami's user avatar
  • 6,183
4 votes

How to tackle teenage arrogance

You have two good answers that have stated much of what I wanted to say. But I want to emphasize something that hasn't been addressed directly. Not only does this piece of work need to be done, but ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
4 votes

How to make 11 years old kid do homework

Agree with the other answer from Joe - with one caveat on the last paragraph. For my kid - they (still) do not care about the grades as long as they don't have to do the work. Also, note that working ...
BoringPanda's user avatar
3 votes
Accepted

Older child 11 years jealous of 2 year old?

Talk Openly to Your Step-Son If your step-son is 11, I think you can have a rather direct and honest approach about this problem. It's fine to acknowledge mistakes or difficulties with an 11yo, they ...
haylem's user avatar
  • 2,328
3 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

Drinking at 16 is not underage (age is 16 for beer and wine and 18 for everything) so I don't categorize your case as "underage", but getting drunk and being brought home by police mean that ...
DDS's user avatar
  • 139
3 votes

17 year old boy being out of control

You sound like an incredible sister, loving and insightful. What a tough situation. The best thing you could do for him is to deepen your relationship, just as you said, with love and minus judgement....
diyImma's user avatar
  • 379
3 votes

"I want to do that on my own" - how to improve situation if they don't actually *do* it?

I was diagnosed with ADHD at 38. My wife and daughter were both diagnosed in elementary school. I sought a diagnosis because of the similarities of behaviors within our family unit, and it explained a ...
do-the-thing-please's user avatar
2 votes

How to handle value mis-alignment between parents and kids?

For Your Washer Example: Make Your Case Based on your example (the washing machine), you're presenting one argument that's apparently close to your heart (the energy efficiency) but without explaining ...
haylem's user avatar
  • 2,328
2 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

Let's first assume that your getting drunk needs to stop. (If you don't agree, then everything anybody does to stop you will seem excessive and your question becomes moot.) What is the minimum ...
EvilSnack's user avatar
  • 121
2 votes

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

Well, there are two questions here. The first is about teenagers getting drunk. Most 16-year olds are going to get drunk once or twice; most find it a very unpleasant experience and learn to control ...
Michael Kay's user avatar
1 vote

Are my parents right to give me a severe punishment for being brought home by the police drunk? I am 16

A lot depends on things the question doesn't state: The drinking culture where you live: In countries that at all drink alcohol it varies from a beer at 14-15 all the way to absolute prohibition ...
fraxinus's user avatar
  • 581
1 vote

How to handle value mis-alignment between parents and kids?

TL;DR - pick your battles. One of the things your parents have modelled is to be tenacious when you're right - what you now need to add to that knowledge is that when you're dealing with belief facts ...
James Snell's user avatar
  • 5,120
1 vote

Why does my daughter smile and start to laugh at me when I am noticeably really angry at her?

Involuntary laughter is a normal response to high-stress situations. It is a way to cope with stress and release tension. From an evolutionary standpoint, this reaction serves the purpose of alerting ...
Jazeah Luster's user avatar

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