New answers tagged

1

In our household, the letting the kids know in advance approach works fairly well. When they're very engaged in something, and the deadline is in 10 minutes, I usually give several 'heads-up' reminders, for example, at the 10m, 5m, 2m and 1m marks. The other thing that can really help, is setting a countdown timer on your phone. The audible alarm and visual ...


2

This goes a bit against common advice but it's something I have had good success with: Be honest. Enforce only things that need to be enforced. That is, if it's really not necessary to leave now let them play another five minutes. Don't insist just in order to assert authority, or just in order to establish and follow rules. This latches on to another answer ...


1

Tantrums are often a means of trying to regain control of a situation. Your child was doing something they enjoyed and then the decision to continue was taken away from them. When my son (2.5) first started throwing tantrums, he would try and arrange the situation back to exactly how things were before he got upset, e.g. trying to pull back on his clothes if ...


0

With both my kids (now 4 and 6), it seems to help to express this "rule" using the same exact phrasing every time. As soon as I start to say it, they know exactly what I'm going to say. I think being a set phrase makes it psychologically harder to argue with. My phrasing is, When we do something fun, and it's time to be all done, we're all done ...


6

In addition to the great accepted answer, you can in addition try to 'make closure' with the activity. This depends strongly on the activity, but finding some way with the kid to complete the activity. Like if it is a building block structure, then take together a photo with you mobile phone, so it gets in some way preserved; of course it is difficult to ...


5

Try asking them about the activity they just did - what they did, what they liked about it, what they could try next time. Give them a chance to process and "chew their food", so to speak. My 3-year-old would always throw a tantrum when we stopped watching TV. It didn't matter how much or little they had watched, or what we'd agreed to beforehand, ...


-8

Children must be taught to obey. You and I were ... more or less successfully. If we hadn't been taught that there are authorities who set the rules and timetables, we could not be good students, employees, etc. A child who throws tantrums is, as you said, punishing the parent for curtailing whatever it is he or she wants -- whether it's ending the time at ...


40

Give the child an advance warning about the upcoming transition (as mentioned in the answer by Roger Vadim), perhaps even several advance warnings. For example: "We will need to go home in 10 minutes", then: "Remember that we are leaving in two minutes, so please start picking up your toys". Children do not like when they have to suddenly ...


9

One approach is to tell that you are going to change the activity a bit in advance, letting the child to digest the idea. E.g., you say that you finish in five minutes, or that you read just the one last story, the last round of a game, etc. It also helps to invoke some rituals/habitual actions - e.g., suggest the child to say "goodbye" to their ...


5

While not an official DSM symptom of ADHD, Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria is a common issue with ADHD. I'm just learning what to do with an ADHD child, so take this advice lightly: I've started working with the child to identify the emotion, talk about how they're behaving, whether it's working, and how to react differently. I'm also trying to reassure ...


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