10
votes
Accepted
What to do when an 8-year-old is not motivated by rewards?
Rewards can actually be counterproductive. In psychology this is known as extrinsic versus intrinsic motivation. And yes, its very common. I well recall being forced to tidy my room and sit down to do ...
- 10.6k
6
votes
Accepted
Reward system for toddlers + older kids?
I have slightly closer together children - 3 and 5 - and did something similar. Except we focused it just on chores ("jobs"); we did not focus on behavior as that didn't quite align with our goals in ...
- 63.5k
5
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Occasional Gift or Daily Reward?
Honestly, I avoid that approach. I don't reward at all. I also do not punish. My children are permitted at times to work toward something they want but it's over and above normal things they do ...
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4
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Getting out of rewards for what kid does
You want your child to learn a subject and as parents this is your call. The benefits include that learning another language is a way to help a person have a better understanding of their culture, as ...
- 17.4k
3
votes
What are tested ways to teach kids about self-discipline?
The marshmallow study, and the theories that have budded from it, are viewed with some skepticism after follow up work has been done.
I'm not saying that what you have been doing can't be a valuable ...
- 411
3
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What are tested ways to teach kids about self-discipline?
There was a famous study done by a professor at Stanford. Basically, he tested children by showing them a treat such as a marshmallow. They were given a choice to eat the treat immediately, or they ...
- 354
3
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How to get over self-consciousness when using praise and positive reinforcement?
No one (including yourself) knows the reason why you feel awkward, so addressing how to get over it at the root end is difficult. Which leaves you with two options: keep silent or force yourself to ...
- 72.2k
3
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What to do when an 8-year-old is not motivated by rewards?
Children are very different in how their motivations work. I have two, one who is very externally motivated (i.e., what you describe above would work perfectly for him), and one who is more ...
- 63.5k
2
votes
Creating focus and thought processes in young boys
Don't force it.
I feel a constant mistake I make parenting is subconciously putting adult expectations onto my kids, and being frustrated when they cannot live up to them. You might be at risk of ...
- 151
2
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Reward system for toddlers + older kids?
I taught developmentally challenged students who were at a 2 year level and they understood.
Reward systems are tricky because your child will not always be able to get a reward for being good or ...
- 17.4k
2
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Accepted
Getting out of rewards for what kid does
It sounds like your son is a dual native speaker. It would be to his benefit to continue to work toward fluency in both languages.
At 6 years old, he probably doesn't appreciate this yet: for young ...
- 2,633
1
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Getting out of rewards for what kid does
I would avoid material rewards that you have to hand to him, because it can establish expectations and demands. There are other kinds of rewards. One cheap reward is praise. Children like being good ...
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1
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Getting out of rewards for what kid does
Before anything, I'd like to point out that there is a lot of scholarly evidence to support that not only are we as people worse at learning things we don't want to (or fail to see the point of), we ...
- 657
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Should we use a smiley chart to reward/punish our toddler?
This will sound like a cop-out but I'm a firm believer that you have to treat each kid as uniquely different. For some kids, maybe even most kids, sticker charts might not work, or might even be ...
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