417
votes
My wife wants a homosexual child
I would strongly suggest some couple therapy before you bring a child into this situation. I worked in a therapy clinic and saw the outcome of overbearing/unreasonable mothering (and fathering). ...
- 2,021
283
votes
My wife wants a homosexual child
Perhaps I have some expertise on this, as someone who has raised one straight and two queer children...
You don't get to decide that. She doesn't either. Yes, you can indeed try not to overly gender ...
- 2,850
166
votes
How to respond to 17 year old daughter going out with a 25 year old man?
I was 19 and ran off with a 27 year old woman from America. (I'm British and she is American). My mother disowned me and we didn't speak for a year.
My relationship with my wife lasted 16 years and ...
- 1,371
130
votes
My girlfriend has mentioned disowning her 14 y/o transgender daughter
You are clearly very loving and supportive of your step-child. This is a great gift you are giving to her.
However, it doesn't sound like you have that kind of a relationship with your girlfriend. ...
- 68.2k
113
votes
My 21-year-old adult son hates me
This is a situation in which you cannot change your son's behavior; you need to either adjust your expectations (i.e. change yourself, the only person you really have control over), or let him suffer ...
- 68.2k
112
votes
Accepted
Is it bad being a "bad influence" for my younger cousin?
I lived in a family which was fairly restrictive. They were quite religious, we always ate healthy, never any junk food, all our activities were vetted and scrutinized. It was also emotionally ...
- 8,987
98
votes
Accepted
Four year old started calling me by my first name. Is this problematic?
There's a difference between why a child does/should/should not address their parent(s) by their first name, and how to explain it to a child. The why is important when discussing the "why not" to the ...
- 68.2k
96
votes
How to tell my parents I want to marry my girlfriend
First up; your parents can protest and disallow it all they want, you're an adult and there is nothing they can really do to stop you from marrying whomever you want and living wherever you want. So ...
- 8,335
72
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
Pregnancy and how it affects the mother is an intense stew of physical and hormonal changes. Each child may come with a different "stew" recipe. Sounds like the father of her original child didn't ...
- 2,159
71
votes
My wife wants a homosexual child
Is my wife overreacting or am I wrong here?
I don't think you're wrong. It seems reasonable - even admirable - to raise a child encouraging any beneficial interests they have regardless of gender-...
- 68.2k
69
votes
How to respond to 17 year old daughter going out with a 25 year old man?
I don't know what to do, do I let them get on with it or should I try to explain my above concerns at the risk of pushing them together?
Why not do both?
It's natural to be concerned. You might also ...
- 2,899
68
votes
Accepted
My 4 year-old says she doesn't love her mom
I think your instincts of jealousy are spot-on. My daughter did this starting when her little brother arrived home from the hospital, and every time she felt like he was getting more of Mama's ...
- 12.3k
65
votes
Accepted
My girlfriend has mentioned disowning her 14 y/o transgender daughter
How do I best protect Emily ... from the bullying she's experiencing from [her mother]?
You are in a tricky situation. It's very likely that you will lose your girlfriend and Emily over this issue ...
- 6,563
63
votes
I don't want to be a father
When we are confronted with a situation in our lives where what we believe doesn't match up to how we're living, we have two choices: Change our beliefs or change our actions.
I think I know that ...
- 625
61
votes
Helping teenage son to get over his crush
Be supportive. Be there for him. And be willing to just listen. He doesn't need you to fix it for him (not like you could anyway). He just needs someone to talk to and be supportive. Listen first....
- 13.3k
57
votes
Get around peer's mind games gracefully
I think the first thing is to take a step back and consider that they are both acting normally for their age. It's normal at age 2 and 3 to have limited social skills, limited empathy for others, and ...
- 7,564
56
votes
I don't want to be a father
I'm going to focus on this one thing that you said, because it's one of the only things you said about what you want, as opposed to all the stuff you are experiencing that you don't want:
I want to ...
- 786
55
votes
How to tell my parents I want to marry my girlfriend
I really like everything about Erik's answer.
The only things I would add is that you have time. If the relationship is right, time will not harm it. Take your time, finish your education and let ...
- 17.5k
54
votes
What is the right and effective way to tell a child not to vandalize things in public places?
Of all your suggestions, only one really says “it’s not ok to kick the dinosaurs”. The other are sending a different message, which can be summed up as
Don’t do it when [some else with more power] ...
- 18.1k
53
votes
What to do about the incestuous relationship between my daughter and her cousin?
First of all, the "how should I handle this" depends a lot on what your own concerns are. Is your concern the "cousin" part? or the "two 14 year olds" part? If the latter, is it specific aspect (are ...
- 6,022
51
votes
My 21-year-old adult son hates me
I have never posted on this exchange before - but I read this and couldn't help myself.
Let me first say I have no background in parenting other than raising my 2 children. I have read no parenting ...
- 651
48
votes
How to respond to 17 year old daughter going out with a 25 year old man?
Several answers already, but I want to address a couple of your concerns.
You are worried about your daughter missing opportunities (travelling, studies). I started dating my wife when she was ...
- 987
47
votes
My parents are taking over my life, I think I'm going insane
This is actually a pretty common problem. Basically, it boils down to you starting to stand on your own but your parents not liking some of the decisions you've made. They feel that you still need ...
- 571
45
votes
Accepted
I don't know if my step-son hates me, is scared of me, or likes me?
You've chosen to become an instant parent to an older child, and this is wonderful, for both of you.
Just to be clear, recovery is by definition the process of dredging up the past to deal with it. ...
- 2,884
43
votes
My girlfriend has mentioned disowning her 14 y/o transgender daughter
This is a fantastic question. You are wonderful for your level of consideration given a perplexing situation here.
The Problem: I used to be Emily. It's over 25 years later, and this thing just ...
- 447
43
votes
How to tell my parents I want to marry my girlfriend
You're twenty and you're trying to cement rocky relations between your parents and your long-distance girlfriend. Admittedly it's not an easy task, even at my stage of life.
First of all, there are ...
- 371
43
votes
My wife wants a homosexual child
Oh dear, this is going to end up in tears.
First you need understanding, then you can argue.
I would suggest to discuss with your wife the mass of documentation (articles, social media posts, ...
- 2,560
42
votes
My 21-year-old adult son hates me
he says not to piss him off because if I do, be prepared for his rage; he will stop at nothing to bury me.
That is a threat, and you should call the police to report it.
For your son to respect you,...
- 5,037
41
votes
My wife wants a homosexual child
I'm going to take a slightly stronger position than most of the other people here. I'm keeping in mind the policy to be nice and simply objectively describing the seriousness of the situation.
There ...
- 3,257
40
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
If there's one thing I'd communicate to a new parent-to-be, it's to completely clear out your expectations. Having expectations sets you up for disappointment, because nothing in parenting is like ...
- 60.4k
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