72
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
Pregnancy and how it affects the mother is an intense stew of physical and hormonal changes. Each child may come with a different "stew" recipe. Sounds like the father of her original child didn't ...
- 2,159
63
votes
I don't want to be a father
When we are confronted with a situation in our lives where what we believe doesn't match up to how we're living, we have two choices: Change our beliefs or change our actions.
I think I know that ...
- 625
56
votes
I don't want to be a father
I'm going to focus on this one thing that you said, because it's one of the only things you said about what you want, as opposed to all the stuff you are experiencing that you don't want:
I want to ...
- 786
41
votes
Accepted
How can I tactfully ask that people refrain from giving religious items at a baby shower?
As the other answers suggested, it's very likely that whatever you put will come of as weird. Still, it's an honest and reasonable sentiment, so it's kind of frustrating that it can't be expressed as ...
- 604
40
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
If there's one thing I'd communicate to a new parent-to-be, it's to completely clear out your expectations. Having expectations sets you up for disappointment, because nothing in parenting is like ...
- 60.4k
35
votes
Accepted
If a pregnant woman's tummy is pressed hard, can the baby in her womb get hurt?
It's fine to 'poke' the outside of the baby bump. In fact it's the first 'game' you can play with your little one. :)
Is it okay to poke my pregnant belly?
Sure… if that’s what you want to do. It ...
- 4,580
26
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
My wife's second pregnancy was kind of the same situation. I'm super excited, but she finds it hard to get excited. There are a couple things that have been affecting her emotionally. As a father ...
- 3,743
25
votes
I don't want to be a father
You are going to be a father soon. My response will be limited to that.
It's pretty clear that you probably won't find happiness in your marriage, so the question might be, for the sake of your child,...
- 68.2k
24
votes
How can I tactfully ask that people refrain from giving religious items at a baby shower?
I don't think you can really tactfully put it on the invitation. In fact, many would say the invitation shouldn't refer to gifts at all. Registries are quite often communicated by family members and ...
- 60.4k
21
votes
How can I tactfully ask that people refrain from giving religious items at a baby shower?
I personally don't think it's polite to invite people to a celebration while telling them how they should and shouldn't gift you. While I am not an atheist, I would still be somewhat taken aback by ...
- 68.2k
17
votes
I don't want to be a father
Although my situation was different, I felt much the same way as you do five years ago. I ended up leaving my wife, but instead of feeling relieved and/or happier it made me feel worse. To make a long ...
- 318
17
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
Your wife should consider getting tested for pre-partum depression (pregnancy blues). Being as emotionally withdrawn as you describe may be a sign of depression.
- 992
15
votes
I don't want to be a father
Would my son be better off with a father who doesn't want to be around but is putting on a smiling face, or a father who was divorced early on? How do I handle my situation?
Whether you like it or ...
- 251
14
votes
I don't want to be a father
Since it is a question&answer board about parenting, I would only answer (vaguely) the parenting part. But do keep in mind that it is only my personal opinion.
For the child, the question would ...
- 1,519
14
votes
Accepted
Do high stress moments affect a fetus?
No doubt, if your wife was jostled, the baby felt this. More than that is hard to say.
As women have been having healthy babies in spite of acute stressors of all kinds, I'd imagine that one episode ...
- 68.2k
14
votes
Research request on marriage for out-of-wedlock pregnancy
One very important consideration for this and all other non-experimental studies: correlation does not imply causation. In other words, just because two things happen together does NOT mean one causes ...
- 2,447
13
votes
Daughter is deciding to have a child with near-total stranger
First off, I would stick to your guns on not raising the child, but you don't need to cross that bridge until you get there. That may never be asked of you. It's going to be a while before this child ...
- 1,095
12
votes
If a pregnant woman's tummy is pressed hard, can the baby in her womb get hurt?
I asked our OBGYN the same thing basically. He explained that it takes a really hard hit to go past the barrier provided by the amniotic fluid. So something like a hard push is definitely not a ...
- 221
12
votes
Partner's son embarrassed about mother being pregnant
Hm.
Imagine being fourteen and your mother having a new partner plus a baby on the way.
Then remember that at that age, the brain is wired differently - aka puberty - and you are at a rather ...
- 18.1k
12
votes
My partner's pregnant with her second child (my first) and shows no emotions. How can I help bring that excitement out of her?
I'm sincerely sorry that you're having trouble enjoying this experience, but that doesn't mean there's anything about your partner you get to fix. You don't get to try to "bring that excitement out of ...
- 268
11
votes
I don't want to be a father
Regardless of what happens between you and your wife, you need to come to terms with the fact that your obligation to your son is now one of the most central realities of your life. The fact that he ...
- 5,903
11
votes
Can an infant sense if their mother is pregnant
All evidence suggests that no, your infant can not sense your pregnancy. What they are very sensitive to, however, are your own moods and activities. Your behaviour (and the behaviour of those around ...
- 26.5k
10
votes
I don't want to be a father
I see many worthwhile and insightful thoughts here. I want to add a success story I hope you'll identify with.
I am also a musician and have a story which bears other similarities to yours--such as ...
- 221
10
votes
Accepted
When should I take my pregnant wife to the hospital for nausea?
No, you're not over-reacting.
The health care system exists for everyone. People go to the Emergency Room for far less serious problems than your wife has, and that's fine (I work in an Emergency ...
- 68.2k
10
votes
Could I have damaged my unborn baby in the womb?
While you could have damaged your child you also have to remember that crack addicts who continue to abuse drugs while pregnant ultimately manage to produce healthy babies more frequently than you'd ...
- 5,102
10
votes
If a pregnant woman's tummy is pressed hard, can the baby in her womb get hurt?
The impact is absorbed by your own belly, and the baby is floating in a bag of water, which absorbs even more. Unless you're seriously bruised or still hurting from the poke, the baby will be fine.
...
- 8,335
9
votes
Can tummy tightening cause harm to the baby in the womb?
Your baby can't be injured by temporarily tightening your abdominal muscles while struggling to regain balance at any stage of a normal pregnancy (and the vast, vast majority of pregnancies are "...
- 68.2k
9
votes
12-year-old hits pregnant mother in the stomach
Her child is twelve years old and still hitting people? This wasn't play fighting or something like that?
Honestly, I think she needs counseling. She shouldn't be hitting anyone at that age, period. ...
8
votes
I don't want to be a father
I would recommend approaching the problem, not running from it.
You said one thing that stood out to me amidst everything else:
...I don't want a relationship with her and don't really like her, I'...
- 1,497
Only top scored, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible