30

I would try modeling the behavior you would like to see in her. I suspect you are correct in your assumption that she learned her current behavior from observing you. Which means you will probably have success by modeling helpful behavior. So when you ask her to pass you a napkin and she responds with "o self", ask your wife if she will pass you a napkin. ...


19

One of our jobs as parents is teaching; using the internet to help with this task is fine, but before you do, teach them how to be safe when they're online. Teach your kids about online safety (posting/chatting in threads or forums, responding to contact requests, how to safely use passwords, keeping personal information safe and secure). It's never too ...


18

Before the days of the internet, parents tended to have a kind of God-like image in their child's mind and would be trusted to provide the right answers on a range of random topics that the child would be curious about. I often wonder how this works now with answers and information that is so easily accessible to everyone. I think part of the answer to ...


16

When you play with him at home, say to him, I can play with you for 10 minutes, but then I have to run to put dinner in the oven and will be right back. At the end of 10 minutes, say I am going to put dinner in the oven and then I will be right back, how about you make superman fly over the tower of blocks (or whatever you are playing) while I am gone and ...


16

My son is 8, and I haven't taught him to use google yet, despite him having his own computer, but I have shown him many times. My main reason is that getting a good result on a general search engine is a relatively difficult skill. Getting a result on an appropriate level for an 8 year-old is even more difficult, especially on topics that schools typically ...


14

There is a very simple reason why you should not do your son's homework: The results of homework assignments show the teachers whether what he taught was understood. Think of the following scenario: Teacher teaches subject A. Homework covers subject A. Most homework is returned mainly correct. ->Teacher assumes it to be understood and moves on to ...


13

First of all, you must check your country's laws. In Poland it's illegal to leave children without supervision when they're under 7 years old (there are several exceptions though). You should allow your kids to go out alone as soon as possible, but not sooner than they're ready:) And if and only if you are ready for that. I think it is important for the ...


12

I think it's unrealistic to expect a 2 year old to be able to play by themselves for a long time. Some might, but not all. We tried the "cry it out" technique tonight but we know it'll take more than one instance to break this behavior. Is there a better approach than "cry it out" to break our son of this habit? Wanting to be with his parents ...


11

As @Stephie pointed out in the comments, the definition of tattletale can be a little ambiguous. I think many parents encourage their children to come to them for help in resolving an issue, but don't want their children "informing on" siblings or playmates at every opportunity. For example, Susie and Johnny are playing. They get into a disagreement, and ...


11

All the things that you mention seem fairly minor. My husband picks off the pizza toppings that he doesn't like. There's nothing childish about not liking a particular food. Labeling this as "delayed" behavior is neither accurate nor helpful. As to her not socializing, it may be that she prefers to focus on her studies. This is a condition that many ...


10

I had to make an account just to answer this question. I live in an European country and we start school at age 7. I grew up in a small town close to my school and it was overall a very safe place. Both my parents worked and I had no siblings. During my first two weeks of school my mom stayed at home to make sure I got up and made myself ready for school. ...


10

The next time he does that, remove him from the situation (eg leave the classroom and go into the hall; leave the hall and go outside; whatever.) As a parent, nobody will challenge you doing this; just say "Excuse us for a moment," and to the child say "Come out here with me for a moment." When you get out of earshot of everyone, stay calm and say: That ...


10

I agree with the points in Stephie's answer. The first step is to stop doing his assignment for him: not only is it cheating, he simply isn't learning. The entire purpose of schoolwork, whether at school or at home, is to educate him through practice. However, that does not mean completely disconnect from his homework. Especially if you have always been ...


9

There are a few obstacles: Ability to read, write, and spell. Even a first- or second-grade student who's pretty good at reading and writing may struggle to input an unfamiliar word or spelling. Search engines can guess did you mean [word]?, which may or may not be what they were actually trying to learn about. Search engines often now can use voice input ...


9

Whether its to visit a friend who lives a few streets away, or going to the park by themselves, or going to the local shop, at what age do you allow your kids to go out by themselves? My younger son is 12 and he knows how to ride the bus to a couple of places, but he doesn't know how to transfer to a second bus yet. He can walk to a friend's house. He can ...


9

As long as your daughter 'can' zip her own jacket, I don't think this is anything you need to worry about. Sometimes my 9 year old wants me to carry her out to the breakfast table in the morning. Of course she can do it herself, but she just likes the attention sometimes.


9

This is a difficult situation you're in. At 16 it is reasonable to be allowed a certain degree of independence, and sometimes it can be very difficult for parents to give you that independence. 1) Compromise The best place to start is to look for an area of compromise. You need to get out the house, so if you can think of a hobby or volunteer opportunity ...


8

First off check that it is possible, I know some airplanes have rules about minimum ages for unaccompanied minors, so you may want to check. Also, don't assume you can take them to and pick them up from the gate - I know some airports do not issue gate passes any more. Check with the airports. If you can't you may have to purchase an unaccompanied minor ...


8

Your rules are not too difficult for a 7-year-old to remember and follow on her own. When I was that age, I was allowed to go visit my friend who lived down the road, but my mom's rules were explicit. You have permission to go to X person's house. You are NOT to be anywhere else and you are to be home by X time. If I find out otherwise, you are in ...


8

I really feel your pain and I think I understand the situation that you're in. Don't despair - you will find a way to make it work - where you can balance your need for independence and respect and still have a relationship with your parents. I lived in Russia until I was 16 and in US since then. I have went through something similar with my mom and my ...


8

I sometimes feel conflicted and depressed about not being their father. [...] I feel like I can't get any recognition for fulfilling that role because I am "just a brother". Question your mindset: Stopp feeling depressed about what you are not. Instead feel awesome about what you are. You are not "just a brother", you are the older brother, who loves ...


8

I was horse crazy since I was old enough to read books about horses. Any child is old enough to ride (I got my own horse when I was sixteen, and taught my four year old sister to ride on my horse, my kids learned to ride when they were seven and eight) but in order to be old enough to be the primary caregiver for a horse a child must have a strong sense of ...


7

Beyond finding out if it is legally an option to leave your child alone (regardless of the time span) I think there are a few things that need to be considered before leaving a child alone regardless of the age that happens. Do you live in a relatively safe location and is there a nearby neighbor that your child can turn to for assistance in case of an ...


7

You might try incentives. Set a schedule and use a loud timer to mark the milestones. "Timer's running...five minutes til teeth have to be brushed." Timer goes off, are teeth brushed? If so, one milestone reached. "Timer is on again, ten minutes to eat your breakfast..." You will be helping the younger two reach their milestones, true, but that's not ...


7

My advice would be not to withhold the necessaries (like textbooks). If your goal is for him to get an education, you are shooting yourself in the foot by causing him to fail in college. Paying for everything he needs for college sends the message that this is what is important. If you just want him to "work", regardless of what he is working at, he doesn'...


7

This is late for independent play to start. This is a learned activity. This suggests that you start young. Here are eight tips that have most helped us in encouraging our toddlers to play independently. Start Young. Toys. Stop Playing For Them. Take Their Play Seriously. Give Them Your Undivided Attention. Connect During ...


7

In short you cannot make her do it. You can tell her whenever you see her with it undone but is this really worth it if all it causes is an argument or you getting annoyed when she won’t listen? And besides, when you are not around you cannot make her. The best way, I believe, to teach her why it’s important to do it up is to try and develop some kind of ...


6

Let me see if I understand this. You're the 16 year old's big brother (didn't say how old). Mum didn't set boundaries with her, so she was doing poorly at school, but you didn't really say if she had difficulty with good relationships with guys, or mention of drugs, illegal activity or other. She's moving in with you and your partner, but you're worried ...


6

Our daughters are 7 and 5,5. Both have already been left home alone a couple of times for ~10 minutes at most, and survived :-) We usually make sure they are engaged in watching some cartoon DVD or drawing, to minimize risks. (The risk we are most aware of is finding a complete mess of a household upon getting home ;-) Sounds like your daughter could start ...


6

I strongly Agree with Vaylkyrie's answer that you need to teach online safety above all. But as an addition: teach them by showing them! They ask something you don't know right off your head? Take them along on the way to figure it out. Also, don't limit that to online search. If you have a book that may cover the topic, go find the book, and see if the ...


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