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130 votes

My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?

I'm from the UK too. Call the parents and check the message was actually sent by them, it seems rather stupid that they would volunteer that information for no reason. I have had my Facebook hacked ...
user23598's user avatar
  • 1,021
76 votes

My son is being hit by a friend, and we need to discuss the situation with his mom

I'm not a professional, but my view is that you don't have any relationship whatsoever with a person who has harmed your children unless the wish for a relationship comes entirely from the child who ...
R.. GitHub STOP HELPING ICE's user avatar
59 votes
Accepted

Neighbor's child is trying to spend all her time with us

You can't make anything clear to someone who doesn't respect your opinion. Explanations only matter if the person you're explaining to has kind of the same world view as you do. This is where ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
41 votes
Accepted

How to encourage my 7 year old to move on from her preschool friend?

I think attrition will allow this to happen in the most natural and least hurtful way. You could encourage new friendships by helping Beth to invite other friends over for playdates or taking her and ...
WRX's user avatar
  • 17.4k
40 votes
Accepted

My son is being hit by a friend, and we need to discuss the situation with his mom

How you act in this situation depends a lot on how much you and your daughter want to see this friendship continue. Make sure to evaluate this from the perspective of how it affects your children, ...
Becuzz's user avatar
  • 13.3k
38 votes

How to encourage my 7 year old to move on from her preschool friend?

I don't see a problem here. We moved house seven years ago, when my daughters were four and two years old. Till this day they still consider their best friend from that time to still be their best ...
dotancohen's user avatar
  • 1,320
33 votes

My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?

Give it time; time helps a lot. It's only been a few days, and this is quite a shock, especially to your daughter who probably worried for her friend's health/life. She's experienced a profound ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
27 votes

My son is being hit by a friend, and we need to discuss the situation with his mom

Your kids' need to feel safe is more important than this other kid's need to have friends, and you need to tell the other mother that.
swbarnes2's user avatar
  • 4,006
27 votes

Neighbor's child is trying to spend all her time with us

This is actually pretty common. First, lets get some things out on the table. Your talking to her. That makes you her friend, at least a little. Don't think that because you're older you can't "be ...
coteyr's user avatar
  • 2,622
23 votes

My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?

Angela got message from her friend via Facebook with "Ha, Ha, I've scammed you." Who guarantees to you that the message is true and the cancer was all made up? Calm down. What do (did) you think ...
Crowley's user avatar
  • 526
22 votes
Accepted

How to help my 5-year-old when other children don't want to play with him?

My nine year old has had similar difficulties, although he does not yet have an official diagnosis. These are some things we found to help: First of all, consider that he doesn't need a lot of ...
Karl Bielefeldt's user avatar
21 votes
Accepted

How to tell my son to uninvite a friend without lying or giving the real reason?

Leaving aside the moral issues (as hopefully you are aware of those), and leaving aside whether you should intervene (a very good question itself), in their mind, this is something between the other ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
17 votes

My son is being hit by a friend, and we need to discuss the situation with his mom

Don't invite Joe to the birthday. He won't have your daughter's full attention, and he'll get upset. This will be setting him up to fail, and that's not what Joe needs. (Nor is it what Joe's ...
Dan Pritts's user avatar
15 votes
Accepted

My friend's kids are a bad influence on my children

In my house, it does not matter who's kid you are. We have house rules that everyone must obey by, including visitors. It's not OK for an adult to come into my house and smoke a cigar; Nor is it OK ...
blaze_125's user avatar
  • 264
13 votes

How can I motivate a 13-year-old girl to take better care of her appearance?

With that background, is getting her into some kind of therapy or at least in contact with a school counsellor an option? OR get someone to help the family in the household? Perhaps even both. I am ...
Layna's user avatar
  • 3,099
11 votes

How to encourage my 7 year old to move on from her preschool friend?

It depends. Is "Beth" not cultivating new friendships, while sitting at home, pining for her friend who has moved away? If so, I'd take a more active role in cultivating some of those newer ...
PoloHoleSet's user avatar
  • 2,149
10 votes

My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?

Assuming everything you've been told is true, it's an example of a "cancer fraud" scam. It's a crime and it's more common than most people realise. Like all alleged crimes, it's the job of the ...
user56reinstatemonica8's user avatar
10 votes
Accepted

Can a “magic answer box” backfire? Is it ok?

I think your worry is justified. This isn't like Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, where you are simply a passive supporter of a well meaning lie. You are thinking of actively deceiving your daughter....
Francine DeGrood Taylor's user avatar
8 votes

My son's friends suddenly prefer to play without him. Should I get involved or let the kids sort this out?

It might help both you and your son to know that this kind of friendship adjustment is common at his age. The nature of friendship changes as children move toward adolescence, becoming less about just ...
Rose Hartman's user avatar
  • 2,447
8 votes

Neighbor's child is trying to spend all her time with us

As you describe the situation, I would consider Angela as possibly a traumatized child in a troubled home situation, until you learn otherwise. This is not to say that her guardians have intent to ...
wberry's user avatar
  • 246
8 votes

My daughter's friend faked having cancer - our daughter found out via Facebook and is devastated. What do we do?

All the answers and comments have addressed almost every possible angle, so I wanted to focus on this: Now our daughter is devastated, and isn't trusting of new people, she doesn't even want to go ...
Martin Argerami's user avatar
8 votes

How can I motivate a 13-year-old girl to take better care of her appearance?

If she were a black lipstick girl, would you feel any different? How about tie-dyes with hemp jewelry? Barely legal slut outfits? If you want her to focus more on her appearance, you're asking her to ...
Stu W's user avatar
  • 2,158
8 votes

Did I screw up when allowing my 12-year-old to invite only one twin to her party?

In my opinion, by twelve it should be up to the children to work this out, and the parents should not involve themselves directly - they should help their children navigate these things if they need ...
Joe's user avatar
  • 62.8k
7 votes

Choosing same name as a friend, how to ask or annonce?

What you name your child is up to you and no one else. If you like the name, go for it, and don't worry if she will be offended, especially since you don't have a close relationship that will be ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
7 votes

How can I ensure my 14-year old's safety on a major trip away from home?

To answer your title question: you cannot. If you decide to allow her to go, you will have to come to grips with that fact. Your natural concerns and reservations are right on target, and you should ...
MAA's user avatar
  • 3,213
7 votes

How to help a shy 6-year-old make friends?

That is a SUPER tough question. For some people making friends is easy, for others it is something that takes conscious effort and does not come easily. For starters it would be important to make ...
BunnyKnitter's user avatar
  • 2,140
7 votes

How do I express my feelings about my 15-year-old daughter's rude boyfriend?

It sounds like you haven't had any conversation yet, so instead of letting your pent up frustration take over I'd take it slow and start with talking to him man to man directly. Doing this in private ...
Adam Heeg's user avatar
  • 3,358
6 votes

My son is being hit by a friend, and we need to discuss the situation with his mom

This is a tricky one indeed. Although I feel sorry for "Joe", I can feel the anxiety this is building up for you. His mom is clearly in denial- and I'm not sure what transpires behind close doors in ...
omer's user avatar
  • 69
6 votes

My 5-year-old's friend's parent doesn't like my child and I fear it might isolate my child after a while

If you think you can have a respectful, adult conversation with the other parent, I would try that first. Tell her that you understand that the experiences when the boys were toddlers were traumatic, ...
Chris Sunami's user avatar
  • 6,183
6 votes

My 5-year-old's friend's parent doesn't like my child and I fear it might isolate my child after a while

At this young age, I'd continue to allow him to be kind and friends with the boy. It's not the other boys fault that the mom is being the way she is. I'd also maybe set up play dates of your own with ...
Tabatha's user avatar
  • 171

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