108

Kids are going to be kids. There is a lot of social etiquette and nuance that they will learn as they gain experience. Four years old is not the time. You should not place this burden on your child at such a young age. Using terms of today, this is Victim Blaming 101. The aggressor (the 28-yo that is yelling at a child) should be the one that is reprimanded, ...


28

The root cause of your child's frustration is expecting to make complex things perfectly without a long process of trial and error. I suggest that the best long-term solution is to offer the child a more realistic version of what to expect on the path to mastery of most skills. All of the attempts to logically persuade the child are best done in the "cold" ...


25

This definitely seems like an issue for your brother in law, not for your son. Kids just don't adapt to changing circumstances that quickly; even much older children would have a problem handling that quick of a switch. Teaching your brother in law how to handle disengaging may be helpful, if he's receptive to that. My six year old is still pretty "silly" ...


22

When a child does something that makes another child feel bad, whether violence or just selfish behavior (which is basically what you're describing), my go-to at any age is to show the child how the other child feels. Ask her to look at the other child's face, which is presumably sad, and point out why. This does two things. It helps to emphasize the ...


15

This feels like very normal behaviour for an only child of 17 months; and the paediatrician is right that socialisation will solve most of the issues. That said, you're the parents, so while it's the school's job to handle this when the child is in their care, it's your job by default. To be honest, all you're seeing here is the standard impulse control ...


12

This kind of On and Off and shouting behaviour can be permanently damaging, while I cannot make 28 years old understand how stupid behaviour of his is making my son uncomfortable. How can I teach my son not to get carried away with anyone to expect dad and mom? I'm sorry, but this is backwards. It's far easier to get an adult to clearly state and ...


9

In America, this is referred to as "The Terrible Twos". You just got to start early, while some kids don't hit it until they're three or so. It's pretty normal behavior for kids that age. They don't understand the concept of sharing, fair play, or being nice. It's all about "What's mine is mine, what's yours is mine, anything I see is mine, I ...


8

I can try to make it less abstract by addressing the specific example that you've mentioned to try to help you move from "abstract" to "applied" in this instance. It could give you a good basis for applying the abstract to other situations in the future. My kids are the same as yours (as are everyone else's): none of them can make a miniature carving and ...


6

Perhaps you could set up a play-date with a friend or friends of a similar age and they could all paint miniatures? (In addition to snacks, TV or whatever is fun at that age group) Even if his friends never enjoy painting enough to repeat the experience, he would have had an age-and-experience peer to compare himself against. You are his dad and his role ...


6

What about cooking? There are many things from cornflake cakes to victoria spnge that can get kids attention - eating something they helped or mostly cooked can be a real motivator.


5

I paint miniatures myself and my 6 year old son has shown an interest in wanting to paint some as well. I explained to him that it takes a lot of practice to get good at anything. I picked up some simpler models to start with. One example being a very simple UFO about the same size as the palm of my hand. I got him his own paints (like the ones kids would ...


5

Let me start with a small anecdote. I am going to tell you about a young man I like a lot. When I met him, he was in his early twenties, six foot something, heavy built and with hands like the proverbial trash can lids. A bit scruffy, and certainly looking like someone you want nearby if you have to enter an somewhat shady area of town. He plays soccer in a ...


5

The obvious answer is to stop buying diapers. Undies only. If she messes her undies, she changes clothes, and rinses the dirty ones. You don't get mad or upset, you just present this as a natural consequence of peeing in her clothes. She'll realize pretty quick that stopping to tinkle is better than stopping to clean up a mess.


4

I would say while Screentime is always an important decision, in this case I see it as substantially more positive than negative. Addressing your concerns He isn't isolated or using it to avoid social contact, in fact it is a bonding opportunity with his father, it is fairly rare to have an activity a child and parent both genuinely enjoy so this is a ...


4

As video game addictions go, Pokemon Go is one of the better ones. The value of having your child outside and walking around is tremendous. I see two possibilities here. Either he is actually addicted to the game (and if you take it away he will find another less healthy one to obsess over) or he is craving more daddy time. Either way the answer is the ...


4

The way to promote functional literacy is to read to your child often about a variety of subjects on their level, like every. single. day. Since you're a bilingual home, both parents will need to do this in their own language. I started reading to my first child as soon as they were able to rest on my lap, at about 4 months. At seven months, they said their ...


4

Step 1: Accept Them; Step 2: Never Stop This may not be what you want to hear, but the best way to 'deal' with this is to actually be accepting. I want to preface this with something you said early on in the wall of text: my only problem is when they try to force it on me like oh you MUST accept the gay community and you're homophobic if you don't and ...


4

To summarize: You now live with your wife's teenage siblings. You no longer have adequate sleeping arrangements for yourself, your oldest son, or your wife. Your son's teenage uncle is being a bad role model for your son. You struggle with your job (work from home or at an office?). Your wife focuses her time on the youngest son, swinging his bouncy (I ...


3

My kid is younger than yours, but also enjoys art, and is sometimes frustrated when things don't turn out the way she wants them. I tell her that every project is an experiment, she's learning what works, and what doesn't. Your son in experimenting with brushes, brushstrokes, color choices, paint consistency, let him experiment. Experiments always involve ...


3

If you are able to articulate the problem and ask a question to gain agreement on future behavior, the adult uncle should understand. Sincerity trumps anger. The parent is responsible for the child's environment: this means setting and enforcing limits for relatives.


3

Children need to be able to respond to changes in their setting. If someone has demanded more than once that the child stop the interaction, then the child needs to stop. It should not take several minutes. To keep bothering someone is inappropriate. It does not need to be instantaneous, but if your son is still at it 30 seconds later then your brother in ...


3

Disclaimer: anecdotal evidence only. My nephew exhibited similar behaviour. He has a high IQ, but not Asperger; he grew up to be a healthy functioning adult, and we were eventually able to discuss his childhood. The seemingly random crying, and the "I don't know" answer, happened to him often at school. He was actually answering honestly; there was a great ...


3

It sounds like your niece is feeling some very strong emotions but lacks the skill set to deal with them. I would definitely recommend working on this with her, but be sure to treat it with a gentle hand. My daughter also had some of these qualities growing up, most around age 5-6. She simply didn't have the vocabulary and/or courage to express her feelings ...


3

You're right that bilingualism has numerous cognitive benefits, so it's a good idea to encourage your child to learn a second language. That said, I wouldn't dictate which language they learn. Learning a new language is a lot of work and you really need to be motivated to do it. It's motivation they are going to have to find themselves, you can't force ...


3

You don't. Japanese is an extremely difficult language to learn, so if it's going to be learned, the motivation for doing it has to be intrinsic - they have to genuinely want to learn it themselves. Maybe you'd be able to get him motivated to do so by trying to get him into subtitled anime or something, but that would also require him to want to explore that ...


3

Crafts and creative projects are a way to engage kids of all ages. They can both make creations to their own level of ability and interest. Here are some options that are open ended enough for varied skill levels: Clay or play-doh Watercolor paints Jewelry or keychain making (provide plastic lacing and big chunky beads for the little one) Cookie or ...


3

Welcome. I see you worry very much about your step-son. Well... don't. I known it's easier said than done. He likes "girly" things and playing girly characters. A lot of people do - at the very least because female character can be more pleasant to the eye. There might be nothing to it, just a question of taste that might or might not change. If there is ...


3

It sounds to me like you've already done a good job of identifying some of the reasons why the child might not tell the parent. Now the task is to reassure the child that their worries will be taken seriously. As parents, our primary task is to keep our children safe, and there are certainly things we absolutely cannot tolerate. But if we are serious about ...


3

Taking the diapers away is a great suggestion so I would start with that, but I want to offer a next step and slightly more extreme option if she still messes her underwear and it doesn't seem to bother her (like with our stubborn son..) Granted our son was just shy of 4 years old and not 6, but we ended up finally taking his pants and underwear off and not ...


2

For the most part, limited screen time in children at that age is seen as potentially positive. The AAP sees an hour or so a day of educational programming for example as actually beneficial, and while Pokémon Go is not strictly educational it’s probably better than most in that regards. In addition, they recommend screen time alongside the parent, which ...


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