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171 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

Judging from your "Jeremy Kyle show" reference as well as your use of certain phrases, I assume that you are in the U.K., which has some impact on which answer is right as far as legal matters are ...
JackArbiter's user avatar
  • 1,456
110 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

Bro, don't be afraid. How old is this child? I'm guessing baby. My for real advice (everyone is RIGHT on the lawyer part, but that's not a part of my answer, because they have already said it. I'm ...
NOP's user avatar
  • 1,118
40 votes

How can I get permission to take my child to Zambia against the wishes of the father?

In a shared custody situation, it is kidnapping for one parent to move the child across an international border without the other parent's permission. It is a very common type of kidnapping, and as ...
Arno's user avatar
  • 3,012
19 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

I'm assuming you're in the UK, based on the language in your post. There are two things you need to deal with here: 1. Legal responsibilities If you agree to have your name on the child's birth ...
Royal Canadian Bandit's user avatar
16 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

Whatever you do, from the voice of experience, if the mother has shown to not be trustworthy, do not restart any relationship with the mother of the child; women often use the child to keep the father ...
Rui F Ribeiro's user avatar
15 votes

How can I get permission to take my child to Zambia against the wishes of the father?

You can get legal help if you don't have much money. If you're in Ontario, contact Legal Aid Ontario. Other provinces will have similar programs. If your son was born and raised in Canada, it may be ...
Gabriel Luci's user avatar
10 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

I know it is easier said than done, but no sense stressing over unknowns. Just do the DNA test. If you are in the USA you could be court ordered, I do not know what they do elsewhere (and since you ...
threetimes's user avatar
  • 7,330
10 votes
Accepted

Am I making the right decision for my child in removing the father’s choice?

I'm a father who tends to think the legal system is biased in favor of the mother, but in this case, assuming that you are not involved in drugs and such yourself, I think you're right to seek full ...
Warren Dew's user avatar
  • 2,643
8 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

There are some good answers above - particularly NOP's - but there is one thing that they don't mention in detail and that is your duty and responsibility as a man. Not a boy, a MAN. It is a man's ...
DrMcCleod's user avatar
  • 315
7 votes
Accepted

How can the non-custodial parent remain a strong influence in their children's lives?

Kudos for asking yourself (and us) this question and your willingness to be a good dad. A lot will depend on the relationship with your ex-partner. I'm assuming a "reasonably amicable divorce" here. ...
Stephie's user avatar
  • 18.2k
6 votes
Accepted

Teenage Boy wants to live with his Mum

First of all I think you are a very good parent. I'm not being sarcastic or something, I just see it how you describe the whole situation. Sixteen is a very difficult age though. Everybody is ...
deadpool_Y7's user avatar
6 votes

My sons biological dad moved 6 hours away and wants to split commute times

If there was a custody settlement, it should cover this situation, ideally specifying where pickup and dropoff occur. If it's not specified, the most normal arrangement is for each party to pick up ...
Warren Dew's user avatar
  • 2,643
5 votes

Should I cancel child support?

How you handle it is entirely up to you. If you choose to bail her out, I believe it is reasonable to ask for something in return. What that something is is up to you (I also advise that you have ...
Becuzz's user avatar
  • 13.3k
5 votes

Should I cancel child support?

Your child has a human right to a family life with his mother. Her financial debts to you are irrelevant to that right. She has a human right to a family life with her child, and again her debts to ...
DanBeale's user avatar
  • 6,656
5 votes

Should I cancel child support?

Your son is 11, and really shouldn't be privy to the monetary specifics of your relationship with his mother. However, "Should" often doesn't translate to reality. So you need to be prepared, if you ...
anongoodnurse's user avatar
5 votes

How can the non-custodial parent remain a strong influence in their children's lives?

Unfortunately, divorce is set up so that as the noncustodial parent, you have very limited opportunities for meaningful impact due to limited time with the kids. Here are a few things you can do on ...
Warren Dew's user avatar
  • 2,643
5 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

First, get a DNA test. That's a no brainer to me. If the child does turn out to be yours, then the ethical answer to me is clear: you're 50% responsible for the child. The fact that it may have ...
Peter B's user avatar
  • 151
5 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

As a foster parent going through the last steps of licensing, let me give you my perspective. First let me say that I am in the US and it seems you are in the UK. Legally I know this sucks a ...
coteyr's user avatar
  • 2,572
4 votes

Being told I'm father to a son I don't want

I want to add my response here, because it seems like most of the answers you've received already are telling you you SHOULD take on the responsibility of being this baby's father, if it turns out he ...
MAA's user avatar
  • 3,213
4 votes

How do I discipline a 14-year-old girl without pushing her away?

What is the best approach to begin getting her back on track and how do i properly teach her consequences and discipline? I would begin to talk to her about her behaviour. You can tell her how you ...
Superman.Lopez's user avatar
4 votes

How do I discipline a 14-year-old girl without pushing her away?

This is only a partial answer, but it's too long to fit in a comment... I have found out my 14-year-old sister is drinking, smoking weed and having sex with her boyfriend I don't think these three ...
Pascal remembers Monica's user avatar
3 votes

What is a good approach for asking friends in a sensitive situation to be legal guardians?

First off, what is your motivation for doing this? When selecting a legal guardian for your child, your only concern should be how well the child will be cared for. It is not something you do mainly ...
Cyrus's user avatar
  • 1,247
3 votes

Should I cancel child support?

I don't think the other answers recognize the legalities of your question and it really should be asked on the Legal SE but I can answer you here. Child support is not yours. It is your child's. ...
blankip's user avatar
  • 244
3 votes

Should I cancel child support?

You know - I'd be a hell of a lot happier if my ex were out of my life too. But she's only in my life BECAUSE we made a couple of awesome kids together. And the kids are already old enough to know ...
Michael Broughton's user avatar
3 votes

Should I cancel child support?

From a legal standpoint, if you think she would sign over rights in exchange for cancelling the child support, I would do it. This doesn't have to limit her ability to see the child, but it does give ...
swilliams's user avatar
  • 1,554
3 votes

How can the god-parent obtain legal custody of children when single parent is comatose?

I will answer what I know as a foster parent in the U.S. In the situation you describe, the children would probably be in foster care. This is one of the "scenarios" we had to deal with during our ...
coteyr's user avatar
  • 2,572
3 votes

Dad makes little effort to see his daughter - to what degree should I encourage contact?

IMO, you absolutely need to encourage dad to see his daughter. She doesn't care at all about the things you do, she just knows he's not around, and that will create anxiety. Depending upon her age ...
Pooh's user avatar
  • 175
2 votes

Dad makes little effort to see his daughter - to what degree should I encourage contact?

As other people have said, this is a very sad situation. I can give you a little insight into my life as a father, and a few bits and pieces that I can think of. I won't pretend to have an ultimate ...
omannay's user avatar
  • 179
2 votes

Child's dad is asking to visit, but is using drugs and uncooperative

Court should not be used as a threat. Family court will help you set up visitation in a way that's fair for everyone. Dad doesn't need to pay for a lawyer -- he can get free legal representation if ...
aparente001's user avatar
  • 5,047

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