Questions tagged [discipline]

How to enforce the rules you set, and consequences when those rules are broken. Use [behavior] for questions about why children act the way they do.

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2answers
413 views

Should you secretly drill your children?

A lot of situations we teach our children about come up all the time. They get plenty of practice looking both ways before crossing the street, for example. However, there are some situations that ...
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3answers
719 views

My wild 3.5-year-old - have I missed out on the key years of relationship-building and discipline?

I have a 3.5-year-old son. He's bright and energetic, but I'm worried about his behavior, since it seems out of control. He was walking at 7 months. His language has always been good - he knew his ...
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3answers
2k views

How do I make my son listen to my discipline, not my mother-in-law?

I have a 6 year old and was a single mum for 4 years. I raised him and disciplined him to the point where he is very very sociable and everybody thinks he is one of the most well behaved boys they ...
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2answers
2k views

How do I stop my daughters severe destructive as well as hoarding behaviors?

My daughter is 7 years old and she has a few very extreme behaviors. She destroys just about everything she owns as well as going after my things. She is hoarding, not only toys and such but garbage ...
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4answers
2k views

What house rules are appropriate for pre-teens?

As my kids grow, they need different limits. Right now, the house rules are reactionary as a result of something we didn't like happening. Things like, "call home if you are going to be somewhere ...
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2answers
516 views

Different discipline approaches by working mommy and stay-home daddy

I work at home (although me being independent is almost a euphemism for being unemployed). My wife is the primary breadwinner in our household. My wife is also currently under a lot of stress, as ...
10
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1answer
431 views

Is long-term punishment effective for children under 5?

A child throws a ball inside the house hard enough to knock over some furniture. He knows he's not supposed to throw the ball inside, so there's a punishment. Is "taking the ball away for a week" an ...
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1answer
360 views

If you are using time outs, how do you deal with a toddler asking for them

We're currently trying to avoid punishment, with the exception of very "natural" consequences (refusing to eat lunch may result in no snack, etc.) But for a while, we were using "time outs" for those ...
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3answers
715 views

My 3-year-old daughter, who lives with my ex-wife, put me in time out in a dark room. Shall I be worried that she imitated what's being done to her?

Long story short married for 3 years, daughter is currently 3, divorced for 1 year. This year, for Father's day, my ex-wife let me spend the whole day with my daughter, which I was over the moon ...
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1answer
478 views

How do you handle a pre-schooler who tries to use excuses to justify his behavior?

My boy is creeping out of 5 1/2. Right now we're dealing with a phase of "Justifications" We tell him not to do something but he starts with, "I'm just" or follows up with "It was an accident" I don'...
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5answers
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Help troubled 5 year old boy on 2nd suspension for kindergarten

Can anyone give me any advise on how to help my 5 year old son. He is currently on his second suspension from kindergarten and nothing I do will stop his behaviour. He has hurt other students and his ...
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6answers
4k views

Are bribery/threats effective and are there alternatives? [closed]

Don't bribe her (chantage / faire chanter) said my sister while I was talking to my almost 3-year-old daughter. It's bad, but what are the alternatives? I read that threatening and bribing ...
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5answers
4k views

Is it reasonable to put limits on a pre-teen playing video games?

Posted on behalf of a friend of mine: What are appropriate rules for how much time kids actually get to play video games (such as x-box 360, PlayStation 3, or on the PC)? Apparently we are the ONLY ...
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3answers
2k views

Punishment for stealing?

I'm in a situation where I'm really not sure what the best course of action is. Today I promised my younger sister that I would give her $100 if she worked up to running 3 miles. As proud as I was ...
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4answers
6k views

How to deal with a naughty 5-year-old nephew who is not being disciplined by his mother?

I live in a joint family with two of my uncles, and I have a very naughty five year old nephew who's a nuisance to the entire household. We live in a flat and my nephew throws stuff out of the window ...
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4answers
2k views

What do you do with the cousins who, at birthday parties insist on opening the presents when they are not the guest of honor?

The girls insist on opening presents for their younger cousins and brother at birthday parties where the family is included. While this was acceptable when the younger cousins (and sibling) were too ...
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2answers
865 views

How can I discipline an angry 12-year-old without her hating me for it?

My 12-year-old daughter till recently had a good, friendly relationship with us (her parents) and was always happy to discuss anything that happens at school/activity classes and what's going on with ...
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2answers
1k views

How can I help my son be more independent with his homework?

I'm concerned because my son didn't do the work he's given from school. The work is tough but I think the problem might only be in one of his classes. I pushed him today to do the homework he's ...
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5answers
2k views

When disciplining that used to work no longer works for a middle childhood boy and q preschooler girl

My wife and I are two working parents so most of the discipline happens on week nights or weekends. When our boy or girl was acting out the consequences were usually one of these: Take away something ...
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5answers
11k views

How can I deal with my son's refusal to go to school?

When my 13 year old son decides he doesn't want to go to school, it's difficult issue to negotiate, as I cannot force him to go to school. By this I mean, he is not a toddler and cannot be picked up ...
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5answers
37k views

What should be done when your child wakes up from a nap and is extremely irritable?

We have a daughter who takes naps and (usually) wakes up extremely cranky and irritable. She is 1 month away from being 3. Because she is so irritable, she'll usually cry when she wakes up. Depending ...
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5answers
45k views

Caught my 16-year-old with his vape

So, we heard through the grapevine my 16-year-old might be vaping. We don't approve but because we didn't want to divulge our source, let it go. Today, he walked through the door carrying it in his ...
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2answers
4k views

Is 5 Year Old Exhibiting Bullying Signs?

My SO and I are concerned about his 5yo's recent behavior. She has become sneaky, rebellious, defiant, manipulative, and slightly physical with her 4yo sister, but never with other children. It truly ...
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4answers
4k views

What are ways to stay calm when dealing with an argumentative teen as a step parent?

How do you deal with becoming short-tempered when dealing with a teenage step-daughter that's running her mouth? How do you cope with feeling overwhelmed, and how do you stay cool when hurtful things ...
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5answers
336 views

How to ensure that necessary things get done when time is short?

My question is based on the following assumptions: I think that children learn by their success, if a certain behavior "works" to get what they want or not. In consequence: A child should never ...
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5answers
3k views

How strict can I be with my niece?

I am a new Uncle and I sometimes find myself in the position that I should tell my niece off, yet I feel that it's not my place to do this. I would only raise my voice to her, but I feel this may ...
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4answers
8k views

How can I deal with with other people's children taking items from my one-year-old?

I currently attend quite a few different playgroups throughout the week with my one year old little boy (he is at the crawling, not quite talking stage). And I recently experienced the awkward ...
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3answers
4k views

8 year old punishes himself for bad behaviour

My 8 year old step-son is still rather sensitive for his age, and sometimes takes being disciplined very hard. When he genuinely feels bad about something he's done wrong and we tell him off, he will ...
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3answers
5k views

How should I address daycare reports of misbehaving 4.5-year-old?

Our 4.5-year-old has been in daycare since three months, and at the same daycare for nearly four years. His behavior at daycare has generally been a little up and down, mostly good days with some bad ...
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4answers
519 views

5yr old son becomes much more disobedient in public vs. in private

I'm a single mom and lost my partner when my son was 6 months old. My son is going to be 5 in June and most of the time when we are alone he is a very well behaved boy. The moment we are in a crowd ...
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3answers
12k views

How do I get my 17-year-old under control when I raise him alone and his behavior is unacceptable?

My husband passed away 9 years ago. My 17-year-old son is currently in high school. I also have a 25-year-old daughter, who doesn't live with us but visits us over the weekend. I'm the one who is ...
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3answers
982 views

How to tell your child it's no longer funny/a game?

We've recently put our 2 year old (27 month) daughter in a new bed without (cot) sides. At first she adapted wonderfully and didn't get up until morning. Of late however, things are getting slowly ...
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1answer
1k views

How to handle disobediant children as non-parental authority figure

I volunteer with children regularly, usually very young preschool or toddler age. One of the common issues I have noticed is that handling disobeying children can become complicated when your the ...
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2answers
840 views

How to cope with my guilt about the way I punished my child?

My 9-year-old child is afraid of swimming, although he is good at parts of it. In just 6-7 days, he is now able to float and can swim a half of the length of the pool. But he doesn't go into the pool ...
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2answers
454 views

A stranger's child throws a piece of garbage onto the ground, out of sight of their parents. Should I say or do anything?

I am a male childless adult living in England. I rarely interact with children. Last weekend, I observed how a boy (perhaps 8 years old) threw a piece of garbage onto the ground, despite being ...
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2answers
4k views

How do I stop my 2-year-old son from hitting and biting

My 2-year-old son has outbursts of anger when he cannot get his own way, he seems to lose control of himself and will scream, hit and even sometimes bite the person that is stopping him from doing ...
9
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2answers
388 views

What can I do to prevent two well-behaving siblings from turning into a maelstrom of destruction when combined?

“Yeah!” said James enthusiastically. “I don’t mind sharing a room with Al—Teddy could have my room!” “No,” said Harry firmly, “you and Al will share a room only when I want the house demolished.” (...
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4answers
5k views

Is “hot saucing” bad parenting?

"Hot saucing", a technique where a small quantity of hot sauce is introduced a kid's mouth as disciplinary action, is considered bad parenting. Though I have not done hot saucing (possibly because my ...
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6answers
4k views

How to deal with homework/studies frustration?

Our kid has been going through some fallback in school scores recently, and as a result, I've been monitoring and helping him to do his homework. Usually, everything goes smoothly, but sometimes, ...
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5answers
980 views

How to punish “unpunishable” 3y old

My son is 3,5y old. Generally he's a good boy. But whenever he can he is very annoying at some time and just refuses to listen. For example he will take my cell phone and when we ask to give it back, ...
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8answers
2k views

Gifted child at gifted school still dealing with behavior problems

My child has always had behavioral problems; I even had a lot of behavior problems as a child so he gets it honestly. I thought that after he was deemed gifted and placed in a gifted program I would ...
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9answers
98k views

How can I stop my 5-year-old's violent tantrums?

I am a single mom to a very good 5-year-old little boy ... 90% of the time. About once a week, give or take, he has a meltdown and becomes violent (hitting, scratching, biting, throwing things, etc.). ...
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2answers
3k views

What to do when there's a conflict between my husband and my 14-year-old daughter?

My husband and I have been married for 8 years. We have 4 kids (2 are from previous relationships.) My daughter is the oldest at 14. Her biological dad isn't around, so my husband is the only father ...
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3answers
570 views

Is it bad practice for a parent to tell their children when they have a right/reason to cry?

I witnessed parents telling their kids that, if they didn't get hurt or physically harmed in any way, they have no right or reason to cry. I kind of disagree because one doesn't cry just because of ...
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5answers
454 views

How do you get your kids to do their chores at home?

My kids are 4 and 5 years old, so I need to always "supervise" them to make sure that they are doing their chores. Sometimes it's a bit frustrating. Any tips or advice on how to handle it better?
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4answers
428 views

How do you encourage your primary-school-aged child to eat new foods?

I thought this question might be a good complement to a question posted about a child that pretends to choke when he doesn't like a certain food. This question and its answers mostly address the ...
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4answers
788 views

How do you respond to your pre-schooler when they tell you that you're on Santa's Naughty List?

My three-year-old son really enjoyed Christmas. My son is still talking about how Santa came to our house to fill our stockings two times (my wife put treats in one night, and I put some in two days ...
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2answers
450 views

My 5 year-old son is defiant, especially at school. How can I improve his behavior?

I’m struggling to find ways to influence my 5-year-old son's behavior. What we’ve done at home seems to result in only short-term effects. He is the middle child between a 10- and a 2-year-old sister....
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2answers
45k views

How can we get our 5-year-old son to control his temper and behave?

Our youngest of 2 sons is 5 years old and demonstrating really bad behaviour. This has been on going for 2 years. He has just started primary one and is a march birthday, so one of the oldest in his ...
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5answers
310 views

6-year-old is crazy only with us

My wife and I are pulling our hair out. Our 6-year-old daughter behaves very well at school and with others, yet at home, when it's just us, she is the complete polar opposite. We have had to restrain ...

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