Questions tagged [death]

Questions dealing with death, whether it be a specific person or pet, or a general discussion of how to broach this difficult subject with children.

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76 votes
18 answers
29k views

Lying to my daughter about her mother's death

My 10-year-old daughter's mother died last week. She was a masochist and suffered from depression and childhood issues. She, from what I understand, hung herself in her closet from a belt. I'm not ...
3 votes
5 answers
438 views

How can 17 year old daughter overcome her fear of both parents dying?

Ever since kindergarten, my 17 year old high school daughter cries at least once a week from her fear that her older than average parents will die too early — my husband and I were around 50 when ...
9 votes
5 answers
1k views

How to address with a child that a deceased actress appears in an upcoming movie?

My 7-year-old daughter is a big Star Wars fan and has loved Princess Leia through all of the movies she has appeared in. In discussing it with her, she already knows that the woman who played ...
8 votes
3 answers
526 views

Preparing a 3-year old for the death of a sibling

We've got two daughters, aged 2 and 3. Our youngest has been battling with cancer for the past year and we've recently discovered that she has relapsed. At the moment we are still waiting for staging ...
25 votes
3 answers
4k views

How do I explain to a 4 year old that our family pet is sick and needs to be put down?

My son loves our 9 year old cat very much. The cat was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer a couple of months ago, and has reached the point where we will soon need to make arrangements to put the ...
5 votes
2 answers
334 views

How to talk about a historic suicide in the family to young kids?

My brother took his own life in 2000 at age 23. My kids - 10-year-old girl, 8-year-old boy and 4-year-old girl - know that I had a brother and that he died, but I have not told them anything more than ...
3 votes
2 answers
412 views

How to talk to my 4.5-year-old daughter about death? [duplicate]

My 95-year-old grandmother is about to pass away and I want to prepare my 4.5-year-old daughter who was supposed to visit her soon. Even though she lives far away, my daughter has visited her several ...
16 votes
5 answers
10k views

How and when to disclose to children a parent's suicide?

My children's father committed suicide 10 years ago, when they were aged 9, 3 and 1. At the time of his death I did not want them to know how he died, but it became such public knowledge I was forced ...
21 votes
5 answers
3k views

How to help children cope with a parent's suicide?

I've asked another question here: How to handle disclosing a parent's suicide to friends and their parents I've noticed that this question here: What are some strategies for helping children ...
1 vote
1 answer
547 views

Should I tell my son about his biological father?

I am a mother of 5 children, in the order of a boy (10), 3 girls(7,5,3), and a baby boy just born a few months ago. I met my husband 10 years ago, 7 months before my first boy was born. Before that, ...
3 votes
2 answers
399 views

5 Year Old - Separation Anxiety and Preparing for a Death in the Family

My 5 year old son recently started school and, his separation anxiety pre-dates school, but it has really highlighted to me just how bad it is. He gets upset when he gets dropped off at school, when ...
84 votes
17 answers
27k views

At what age should I tell my daughter that her real mother is dead?

Long story short: my first wife passed away while giving birth to my daughter. Two years later, I've remarried, but I am concerned over when should I tell my daughter the truth about her mother. My ...
22 votes
8 answers
25k views

What to do when a 6-year-old expresses suicidal thoughts?

A mom at my daughter's school told me that her son told her that my 6-year-old daughter told him that she doesn't like herself and wants to kill herself. I'm really not sure how to approach this with ...
4 votes
2 answers
444 views

How to instill sensitivity in kids?

I am new to the site and don't know if this question exactly falls into the domain of this site. We have a group of volunteers in our university who go to a school in a nearby village to teach. Some ...
6 votes
7 answers
2k views

My child is afraid of death

My daughter is 13, and terrified of death. I'm Christian, and I believe there is a heaven, but she isn't religious- according to her, she's tried, but can't make herself Believe in anything. At first, ...
9 votes
6 answers
3k views

How to (or should I even try to) break a zombie fixation for a three-year-old

I have two boys, one eleven, and one three. I don't know exactly how or when, but the 11-year-old has decided that it was a good idea to explain the the 3-year-old all about zombies. Of course he ...
7 votes
4 answers
3k views

My 4.5yr-old girl is afraid of death. What should I do?

Last night my wife (as usual) was putting our 4.5yr-old baby girl to sleep. Our daughter becomes very chatty at that time and (especially in the presence of mom) expresses thoughts and things that ...
1 vote
1 answer
368 views

Delegating godfather responsibilities to atheist brother [closed]

I have two siblings: a younger brother "Todd", and an older brother "Jack". Todd is a single father of three (realtor; lives in Canada; wife left for Europe and hasn't been in the family's life for 5 ...
4 votes
5 answers
1k views

Family wants my 2.5 year old daugter to visit my declining grandmother

My grandmother is currently sick and at hospital. Basically, she has Alzheimer's disease and she has not much time left. The last time I saw her, a few weeks ago, she was very thin and not able to ...
6 votes
1 answer
1k views

4-year old unconcerned about pending death of pet

We learned recently from the vet that our dog has cancer and probably only has a few months left (he's old, don't feel too bad). My 4-year old daughter reacted to this by saying "good, this means I'...
7 votes
2 answers
282 views

How do you help a primary schooler who is struggling after a death in the family?

My mother-in-law recently passed away. It was rather sudden; the funeral was less than 2 weeks after she first went to the hospital, and it was several days in the hospital before we realized the ...
7 votes
4 answers
2k views

How to explain the "brutal" ways of wildlife and nature to a kid and when?

I would like to expose my kid to a lot of different animals quite early on (starting from 2-3 years), mostly through telling them about it and showing photos/pictures. Even though screen would be ...
5 votes
3 answers
315 views

What qualities should be looked in a bedding for an infant to prevent the crib deaths?

What qualities should be looked in a bedding for an infant to prevent the crib deaths? Does sealing the bedding with a strong polythene sheet provide any benefits or risks?
13 votes
1 answer
614 views

How to prepare children for impending death of a parent?

My mother is expected to die within coming days/weaks/months (final phase of cancer). I have an 11 year old sister - how can I help her? What would be a good idea to suggest to my father and older ...
2 votes
3 answers
454 views

What to say to a child whose pet just died

My 24-year-old daughter's cat just died. I've never met her cat, and I am currently only in contact with her over Facebook. I also don't know her address so I can't send her anything. It really has ...
10 votes
3 answers
2k views

Take a 3 year old to funeral?

Would you take a 3 and a half year old girl to the funeral of her great-granddad? She knows about death and heaven... Death belongs to life, right? On the other hand, I don't want to overstrain ...
2 votes
1 answer
216 views

How to talk to parents about death?

My parents have always tried to shelter me from trauma (divorces, illnesses and deaths in the family, and so on) which makes it difficult to broach the subject of death with them. This is more of an ...
32 votes
4 answers
3k views

How to handle disclosing a parent's suicide to friends and their parents

I have three children 12, 13 and 19 and their father committed suicide 10 years ago (when they were 1, 3 and 9). They have suffered through many childhood taunts, at times, including: "Your father ...
40 votes
4 answers
5k views

How to prepare children for impending death of a parent?

My wife has been told that she has a limited amount of time left due to an illness, the average life expectancy is 7-8 years after onset, of which we have used up 7. With excellent management, and ...
9 votes
5 answers
3k views

How do you explain terrorist extremism to children?

I have an 8, 6 and 4 year old. While eating dinner, we watched Obama's announcement on Bin Laden. With hindsight, it would have been easier to keep the TV off, but I thought it was a good idea at ...
28 votes
3 answers
968 views

How should I talk to my child about death?

How should I explain death to a child under 5-6 years old if a close family member or friend dies?