Questions tagged [conflict]

Habits or opinions that cause disagreement, and how to resolve those differences.

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1
vote
1answer
153 views

“I don't like this” vs. “Leave me alone”

My two pre-schoolers (almost 4, almost 5) sometimes play rough with each other, e.g. when fighting over some toy. When one of them asks us parents for help, it's sometimes part of the game (they want ...
2
votes
4answers
177 views

Four Year Old - Won't listen, cries frequently, incredibly stubborn

I have two children, a four year old and a two year old. Both my kids are sweet and kind hearted. However, the 4yo has suffered from separation anxiety in the past and has a very stubborn personality. ...
1
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2answers
164 views

How to teach kids that loud voices are nothing to be scared of

If parents are habituated to raising their voice when disagreeing with their partner, in the presence of kids, it appears that the kids are visibly distressed due to this. It is clear that its the ...
6
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4answers
17k views

8-year-old refuses to blow his nose

My 8-year-old son constantly has a runny nose. When he sniffles and I hear it, I'll usually ask him to blow his nose. Sometimes he starts arguing and whining as soon as I ask - for some reason he ...
0
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3answers
265 views

How to protect my children from abusive mother?

I am looking for some urgent advice with how to proceed. My wife is constantly emotionally and physically abusive to both my 3 and 5-year-old. She belittles both, plays favorites, talks about her ...
10
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9answers
6k views

How to deal with parents that enforce a curfew on an adult

So my parents, especially my mother, feel the need to control many aspects of my life because "I'm not responsible", which is at least partially true. Completely ignoring the fact that I'm never going ...
6
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3answers
795 views

How do I express my feelings about my 15-year-old daughter's rude boyfriend?

My 15-year-old daughter always has her boyfriend around the house and I don't like the way he talks to her and my family, as the man of the house I would like to show that I am dominant and show that ...
8
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2answers
3k views

What to do when there's a conflict between my husband and my 14-year-old daughter?

My husband and I have been married for 8 years. We have 4 kids (2 are from previous relationships.) My daughter is the oldest at 14. Her biological dad isn't around, so my husband is the only father ...
3
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3answers
440 views

Should I be concerned about my 6-year-old daughter resolving most of things with crying or yelling?

My 6-year-old daughter is generally a very optimistic, probably happy, smiling kid which likes to play with her sister and others. But... only until everything goes according to her expectations. ...
4
votes
2answers
294 views

How to deal with a pre-travel conflict with my mother about overpacking?

I am 22 years of age and living at home while I finish my degree. My upcoming trip (with family) begins to take shape. I will be travelling with my mother for roughly 2 1/2 weeks (the first half of ...
5
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1answer
451 views

How can I make my parents understand that once I finish my studies, everything will be fine?

My parents are not highly educated. They have gone to primary school only. Also, my family's financial condition is poor. But now the condition is improving gradually. Fortunately, I am good at study. ...
11
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3answers
1k views

When my kids don't get along; what are some options besides punishment that can be effective beyond 5 minutes?

I have an 8-year-old daughter and a 5-year-old son. Sometimes my kids get along great, but like most sometimes they clash. I've been trying to work on substitutions to my usual model of rewards and ...
5
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1answer
3k views

How to implement natural consequences to make an 8-year-old stop being rude to a sibling?

I have an 8-year-old son, a 6- and a 2-year-old daughter. My son is a model student but really likes to argue. He's extremely stubborn and always right. When he argues with me, I'll correct him and ...
20
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5answers
4k views

Is it a good approach to have a policy of apologizing for yelling at a kid?

A couple of times I encountered situation where people had a following policy If a parent yells at a kid out of frustration with no meaningful reason (e.g. the kid just got on their nerves but ...
4
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5answers
6k views

How to react when two toddlers fight over the same toy?

Your children are playing happily. Suddenly, you hear them yelling and notice that they both grab on to the same toy and fight over it. You don't know who "had it first" and, thus, has some kind of "...
14
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4answers
1k views

How to minimize the negative impact on our child when we parents argue?

My wife and I have an 8-month-old baby boy. Having a fight, for example debating, is something that we don't want to do. But sometimes, we can't avoid having a fight in front of our son. When the ...
13
votes
1answer
505 views

How to deal with my son calling me on the telephone when he is in a fight with his mother?

I am divorced and have an 8-year-old son. Our son lives half of the time with me, half of the time with his mother. Communication between us parents is good, there is no conflict of any kind, and we ...
8
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6answers
1k views

How to deal with my parents frequently getting mad at my life choices?

I’m 26 and I find both of my parents get mad at me for very bad reasons. For example, I was visiting my mom. In a mad tone she told me to stop playing a game on my phone. Just realizing it now, I find ...
11
votes
6answers
2k views

How do I explain the difference in responsibilities and privileges between the oldest and youngest child?

"It's not fair, why can't I do/have it as well?" This must be the recurring question that annoys me the most. Why can't the youngest do or have the same things as the eldest. Why does the eldest have ...
6
votes
1answer
1k views

How to bring my 23-year-old daughter to an adult discussion with me and her mother about issues?

Summary I was witness to a banal argument between my 23-year-old daughter and her mum which has lead to a three month impasse, whereby my daughter has installed herself in my small apartment with the ...
8
votes
4answers
705 views

How to handle value mis-alignment between parents and kids?

I'm (kinda) asking this question for my parents and family. My parents and I share very different values. For example, I think we should replace our old washing machine with a new, energy-efficient ...
1
vote
1answer
467 views

Should I tell my son about his biological father?

I am a mother of 5 children, in the order of a boy (10), 3 girls(7,5,3), and a baby boy just born a few months ago. I met my husband 10 years ago, 7 months before my first boy was born. Before that, ...
4
votes
2answers
952 views

How to deal with extreme misbehavior of younger siblings?

I have a 3-year-old, a 5-year-old and an 11-year-old who have just been the most exceptionally worst behaved children on this planet. Between the 3- and 5-year-olds, they backchat, break things, have ...
-3
votes
3answers
7k views

How to treat an 18 year old girl who avoids being with family and likes being with friend?

I am asking this question on behalf of my friend, who has an 18 year old daughter. She has always been talking to me about her daughter, and whenever she talks about her, she cries. The girl used to ...
2
votes
1answer
294 views

Can I avoid nice clothing being a source of argument?

My middle child (seven years old) hates dressing up. Well... sort of. He likes shopping for dressy clothing (slacks, vest, button-down shirt, tie) and has a respectable collection. He'll even ...
3
votes
2answers
276 views

Daughter's reluctance to come to my place during a quasi-separation - impact on social life

My wife and I are in a kind of quasi-separation situation. My wife is emotionally abusive, resorting to the silent treatment, gaslighting and projection regularly. She moved to a different city with ...
5
votes
3answers
341 views

During and after a separation - explaining to children who their “family” is

My wife and I are in a kind of quasi-separation that is likely to lead to divorce. She has been and is emotionally abusive (the silent treatment, projection and gaslighting being what she does most), ...
-1
votes
4answers
443 views

6 year old doesn't know my husband is not her father

I have a 6 years old daughter that is not the daughter of my husband. My daughter doesn't know. Nobody else knows except my husband. I want to tell my daughter some day that my husband is not her ...
3
votes
0answers
381 views

How to help a pre-schooler overcome sensitivity to social setbacks?

My son (3yrs 9 months) is bright and generally happy, but sensitive and sometimes acutely anxious. The sensitivity worries me a little for the future. If something in a social context doesn't go his ...
0
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0answers
126 views

How to resolve the conflict when my wife wants another baby and I don't, at all? [duplicate]

I'm 46 and my wife is 36. I met my wife when she was 28 and I was 38. I already had a 2-year-old child from a previous relationship at the time. When my wife hit 30, she was desperate for children, so ...
1
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0answers
337 views

I got a vasectomy after our 3rd child. Now, my wife wants a 4th child, but I don't [duplicate]

My wife and I (both 38 years old) have been married for 8 years now and we have 3 amazing kids (all under the age of 8). We really could not ask for more. Like any couple, we have gone through our ups ...
3
votes
1answer
134 views

How to help 3-year-old stop breaking down about going to the bathroom?

My son is 3 years 11 months old. He's been potty trained for about 10 months now. Things were just fine early on, he would go potty when we asked him to with no complaint. For the last few months ...
13
votes
3answers
2k views

How to tell parents of guests that we had a loud fight during a sleepover?

My 9-year-old daughter had a few friends sleep over. My husband and I got into an argument in our room after we sent everyone to bed. He lost control and got really loud. He started slamming doors ...
6
votes
2answers
831 views

My son calls my father in law Grandpa “nonno” (in italian) and his wife (step grandma) is telling my son to call him just Grandpa now not nonno

My son has always called his grandma (my mother-in-law) the Italian word for grandma, "nonna" and his grandpa "nonno", the Italian word for grandpa. Recently my son called his grandpa "nonno" in front ...
0
votes
1answer
290 views

How can I ask my parents to help us by watching the grandkids on occasion?

Background I am a happily married mother of two, ages 3 and 4 respectively. My parents are in good health, mom is 62 and dad just turned 70. They have a good marriage and my mother lives in a house, ...
2
votes
1answer
325 views

how to deal with my sister

I have a sister 8 years younger than me (18) years old. My Mom and I have always tried to do the best for her and support her, however she is really rude to all my family members. She doesn't respect ...
12
votes
7answers
2k views

Between parents and marijuana smoking sister

I live in the UK with my sister, who has been smoking marijuana for about a year now. I have known for a large part of that time. She smokes relatively often, however not enough that it's a major risk ...
13
votes
7answers
10k views

How to deal with my teen daughter who is stealing and lying?

My daughter has been lying and stealing from us as well as someone she called her BFF. We give her consequences and she continues with her stealing and lying. Recently I found out that she was cutting ...
7
votes
2answers
531 views

How to handle child's apology for something he says he didn't do

I have a nephew who's in kindergarden. He's shy and dislikes conflict, when other boys get loud, he goes away to where it's quieter. Another boy accused him of having kicked him; he says he didn't do ...
10
votes
8answers
12k views

How to convince an adult son that pot and LSD, even used sparingly is not acceptable

We have a child who has gone off to college and did not perform well his first year. We also found out during this time that he smoked pot in high school a little, and during his freshman year at ...
24
votes
7answers
7k views

How do I tell my parents I'm no longer Christian?

I have been going to church my whole life and faithfully following the Christian religion for 18 or so years. I'm 20 years old, and I have been having doubts about my faith for about 2 years now. My ...
14
votes
3answers
3k views

How do we convince parents that we can't all be there within one week of the holiday every year?

Here is the dilemma. My wife, my brother, my five-year-old son, and I live about five hours from my parents, about four hours from my father-in-law and his SO, and about an hour from my mother-in-law. ...
5
votes
2answers
1k views

An Adult Child and a Difficult Ex

My biological son, 26, will soon be graduating college and my wife (his step-mom) and I are throwing him a graduation party. My wife and I have had a very difficult time with his mother and her ...
28
votes
7answers
21k views

Breaking my rejection of christianity to my parents

I know this isn't exactly appropriate for this site -- I'm not a parent, I'm a son -- but I think it's still applicable to the community here. I would prefer feedback from actual parents concerned ...
19
votes
3answers
12k views

Teenage daughter and stepfather

I have a 16-year-old who has no respect for her stepfather. They hardly communicate and each time he says something she snaps or makes a stroppy or contradictory comment. He sometimes loses his temper ...
3
votes
2answers
347 views

What to do when child asks from older kids and they refuse

Background. My son is 4 years old and, as all other kids, is very fond of video games. He has a limited screen time, and currently his tablet was broken by his younger sister. He cried but then ...
1
vote
2answers
591 views

Trouble with parent who pushes the envelope in every argument

I Live with my father during the summer, and I do my best to make sure that I leave the smallest footprint possible. Doing my own laundry, dishes, food, etc. I think I do a good job. My father and I ...
-1
votes
1answer
127 views

Who behaved badly? [closed]

Grandparents arranged to visit their sons family in order to provide baby sitting services for the weekend while the parents made home renovations. Two days before the weekend, it was agreed that the ...
2
votes
2answers
2k views

What is the role of parents in conflicts between adult siblings?

Trying to keep this short, the main question is really in the title.. Background My sister and I have a conflict which began about eight months ago, and I am currently not talking to her. We're both ...
14
votes
5answers
585 views

How can I stop my parents from fighting?

I'm am 13 years old and my parents have been fighting a lot they stay up all night fighting. Most nights when they do fight I never get any sleep I just cry. I want to tell them how I feel and I tried ...