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What should children call a step-grandparent?

My stepson and his wife (both in their early 20's) recently had a baby. My son does not want me to be called Grandma and I must admit I find it to be a bit awkward as its not my son or daughter who had the child ( nor do they have any yet). I also don't want to be disrespectful to my stepsons mother. So my question is what do I call myself when sending cards etc ?

  • Welcome to the site! As this question is nearly duplicated, and is likely to produce a list. I'm not sure this is the right place for it, but I will offer this one idea: There are TONS of options when you just consider the different options as dictated by language that would distinguish you if you really feel you need distinguishing. Do you have a non-english heritage? Perhaps Omah? Nonni? Also, even though they are both Blood grandfather's my daughter refers to one as papa and the other as an animal he resembles. I have a friend who calls her's "Reddy Fox." Just pick something u like. Jan 29 '13 at 6:37

The answer to these kind of questions varies from culture to culture and region to region.

In my community, the general thumb rule regarding this is, what do that person's cousins/step-siblings call that person? The same applies to that person.

For example, if my sister has children,

  • My sister's children would call my parents nana and nani (their mom's parents)
  • My children(I am male) would call my parents dada and dadi (their dad's parents)

Extending the same nomenclature,

  • My sister's children would call her in parents in law dada and dadi (their dad's parents)
  • My children would my parents in law nana and nani


  • What do my children call my sister's in laws?
  • What do my sister's children call my in laws?

There is no separate name for these relationships. So they fall back on what their cousins call these people. Therefore,

  • My children would call my sister's parents in law dada and dadi (because that's what my sister's children call them)
  • My sister's children would call my parents in laws nana and nani (because that's what my children call them)

Extending the same logic, what would this child's step children call you? That should give the answer.

There can be all kinds of grannies, big and small, young and old! There is(or used to be) a big age difference between the mum's mom and the dad's mum so it's nothing unusual at all.

However that's just how things are done in my community. You can decide whatever you want them to call you.

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