We have two kids (in 8 mos, we will have three). Our daughter is 4, diagnosed autistic. Our son is 2.5--never assessed, but does not appear to be autistic (displays no visible to us symptoms).
While we lived in NY, due to state budget issues, she had no access to services until this past Jan (and it wasn't even full services that she was supposed to receive), so we had no prof assistance with her and her behavior was very difficult (she was unresponsive to most direction and would routinely lash out, especially at her brother).
Despite this, over the course of about a year, we got her to pee in her potty. Her brother, whom we began training around same time, achieved same degree of success of peeing in potty. A month ago, we moved from NY to Illinois. The move severely shocked our daughter, and the first two weeks, she was tremendously combative and physically aggressive, especially with her brother. She hardcore refused to use the potty and we decided not to wage that battle. Two weeks ago, she was admitted into the school system and at last, began to receive full services. Her behavior improved and we are resuming potty training. Unfortunately, not only are we at ground zero with her on potty training, but also with him, as during our first two weeks here, while she was aggressive, he too began to refuse using the potty. So we are starting from scratch with him as well.
My question is this: should we attempt to, either on our own or with professional assistance, speed track the potty training process with him (regardless of her rate of progress) or is it better to go back to the beginning and let it take how long it takes?
Any additional thoughts appreciated.