How to decide between two daycare institutions after interleaving them?

Question

Our 3.5-year-old daughter was going to one kindergarden (2 days a week) for a year. She liked it there but we were also on the waitlist to another kindergarden where her best friend is going to.

Two months ago, the new kindergarden gave us two days a week and we decided she'll be going to both kindergardens for some time before we can make a decision, do we switch to a new kindergarden or does she stay in the old one. At the moment she goes Wednesday to the old kindergarden, Thursday to the new one and on Friday to old one again.

But we found one pattern which puzzles us and makes it difficult to make a switch or stay decision: on Wednesday our daughter is very excited and wants to go to the old kindergarden, same thing on Thursday when she goes to the new kindergarden. But Friday is always the problem - she does not want to go to the new kindergarden and looks upset and even cries when we drop her off, but she gets OK later during the day when we call to childcare workers to check how she is now.

We tried talking to her why she is so upset on Friday but didn't get much from her. We would think she does not like the new kindergarden, but why then she is so excited to go there on Wednesday?

If you have some ideas on what might be going on or have experience with switching kindergardens, would really appreciate your help.

Answer 1

It seems odd to interlace the locations as you do (ABABA) -- if you must, then at least make it AAABB so that there is less change. I believe that changing location every day can be a source of needless frustration for all of you.

As DA01 comments, I would recommend choosing just one institution.

Answer 2

My son (3.75yo) interleaves a kindergarten and a early learning centre (KEKEK). We have done this by choice: the kindergarten has local kids who are likely to follow him into school next year, the ELC has a stronger academic focus and will prepare him for school. Kinder is half days and ELC is full days.

He has had zero problems adapting to this regime and loves both of them.

5 years ago, my daughter did exactly the same thing. Sometimes she would cry when being dropped off at kinder even though it was only half a day and it was with her social set. I suspect part of this was the gender imbalance (19 boys in a group of 25) and partly because she found kinder boring. My daughter is a lot more emotional than my son - she used to cry every time she went to her previous childcare centre because she hated one of the carers.

As Torben pointed out, your child may have a difficulty with change - some kids do. I have no doubt we did the right thing for our kids but every kid is different.

Alternatively, your child has just gone from 2 days a week to 3 - perhaps they just don't want that third day.