I'm 16 years old, in my jr year of high school, yet still my parents are treating me like I'm 12. My metal health has suffered a ton and at this point I really don't know what to do. This website is basically the only chance I have, so I've decided to ask you all, how do I deal with strict parents?
My parents have a ton of unreasonable guidelines for my age, those being;
My phone is (extremely) restricted, I only have a few games and not even basic internet access (I can't do so much as a google search),no social media at all, and I can only text/call a few select people, it all shuts off at 11 pm, weekends or not. I have a school issued Chromebook where I can access this site, but obviously this computer has safe search on and most things are also restricted, it's a bit better than my phone, not by much.
My parents also have to control how I dress and how I look. They don't let me wear some jewelry I've spent my own money on, won't let me wear any makeup to school, etc. If I dress up at all to hang out with friends, I have to hear about it all day until I take everything off, my Mom will even say things like "you look terrible" or "I don't want to see you like that, take it off." I feel like they're always judging me for my style choices if I dress how I like (or as close to it as I can get with them), so I usually just don't try at all and I hate it.
They're really controlling around who I hang out with or what I do. I have to have a full hour long discussion just to be allowed to go to the mall with my friend. It always feel like a fight to go anywhere or do anything. And even then, they always have my location, and constantly ask me what I'm doing, and they'll always want me home way earlier than any of my friends have to go home (usually around 6/7).
They also put a ton of pressure on me around school. Their expectation is A's, and anything below that I get lectured for. Right now I have 2 classes with B's, and I've been hearing about them for weeks. My Mom is telling me I must need a tutor since I have a B in Data Science, which is a hard class. I'm trying and doing pretty well, but apparently it's not enough. If I ever got a C or maybe even a B-, I'd be in trouble.
They've really invaded my privacy and this is the worst part. I don't feel like they respect me at all. I know my Mom looks through my room when I'm not home. They have access to my email and check it, and they'll randomly look through my phone. They went as far one time to look through personal chats of mine with my friend and boyfriend right in front of me, which was terrible. They really ruined my trust with them and made me feel super uncomfortable. They didn't need to read what I had said privately to someone, then judge me for it. Ever since this happened our relationship hasn't been the same.
Even worse, my brother, who is only 14, has mostly unrestricted internet and they never look through his private things at all. They treat us completely differently, and he has all the privacy in the world. They give him space to just do his thing, then put all these restrictions on me.
I'm depressed. I feel like I don't have room to just be a normal teenager and experience what that's like. I feel disrespected, and I feel like I can't talk to my parents about this because whenever I try to have a "sit down discussion" with them, they just get mad and shut me down immediately. My mental state has been horrible lately and I just don't know what to do. Has anyone been in a similar situation? Do you have any advice? How should I try to approach a conversation with them, how do I cope, etc?
(Just to be clear, I love my parents and I know they love me. I just feel like they've put me through things they shouldn't have and I'm not being treated right. I don't hate them and I'm not "ungrateful," I just want space and less restriction on my life.)