I'm a father of 3 children : one girl 19 and two boys 17 and 15.

My 17 yo son didn't like me, he hates talking to me, going with me out, sitting next to me

he is preventing me from from every bonding moments with him.

I feel so hurt, i don't know what to do with him?

I'm not bad; i always encourage him, help him, when his mom ( overprotective ) say no i make her say yes just to let him get fun it's his age, I buy everything he wants, I try to talk to him to be his friend... But he pushing me away from him, like I'm a stranger.

He always annoyed when he talk to me, he is like feeling i'm lower than him.

I can't understand him. What's my fault? What i did? I can't find anything, we were inseparable when he was younger what happened to him suddenly?

My relationship with his siblings are very tight so why with him ? Why?

I feel so heartburn

By the way, his mother and sister talked to him about fixing his behaviour with me but he is not listening to any of them

Note : I don't hit my children


It's hard to say what's changed, but one thing you should recognize is that your son is (effectively) an adult. Just like any adult, relationships will ebb and flow, and they have to be allowed to change over time. It's entirely normal for children when they're right about at that point where they're adults, but aren't actually adults, to push away from their parents some; they want to be their own people, and define themselves for who they are instead of who their parents think they are, which is colored by so many parts of their childhood.

All you can do, is be there when he needs you, and continue doing your job of setting appropriate limits and setting a good example for him. Be there no matter what he gives you - it's tempting to say that if he pushes away from you, then you should do the same; but that's not the adult thing to do, and you're setting the adult example still. Let him pull away to define himself, and then there will be a point where he defines himself confidently as his own person - and then will be willing to re-establish the relationship. Or not; it's possible he won't, and you can't force that. But, in most cases, it does.

  • 1
    Thank you very much ❤️
    – Ben
    Oct 13 at 6:48

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