I have three kids. For the last 10 years, my two oldest have had a good relationship with their grandparents and father's family.
This past weekend, an ex-boyfriend and I met up for drinks to catch up, and we always knew there could be a possibility of him being the father of my second child, but we never acted upon it. The day she was born, I told my husband at the time that if he wanted to do a DNA test to do it then, and not wait. He said no, that the child was his and so we went on with life.
We eventually divorced and now he gets the kids one weekend a month. So now I'm trying to figure out if I should have a DNA test done for my ex-boyfriend to see if he is actually the father of my second child. I don't want to screw her up, but I feel like everyone needs to know the truth on who she is. She has no idea that my former husband is not or may not be her dad. He is all she has ever known.
I've tried to get my ex to take a test in the past, but he never agreed until now. He is finally in a stable place mentally that he could handle being a father, but I don't want to screw my kid up mentally. Is 10 too young to pass on this information or should we wait until she is 18?