I have twin 6-year-old cousins (a boy and a girl) who I usually see about once a week or so, when the locally-resident segment of my family get together for dinner on Friday evenings. Yesterday, when the twins and I were playing together while waiting for dinner to be ready, the girl looked at me, smiling, and said "You're a girl.". There's a good chance she was joking (for instance, she loves to call me her daddy1), but it might also (or instead) have been because I was wearing a skirt at the time (I'm biologically male, but identify as probably bigender [or possibly trans]; the wearing of skirts is a recent thing).
I ended up just saying "Maybe" in response, but I don't know if I'd have known how to answer if she'd asked me directly if I were a girl or a boy (something which, as stated earlier, I'm not exactly sure about myself):
- If I simply said, without qualification, that I was a boy, I would've been lying to her, which is something that I do not want to have to do.
- On the other hand, if I told her that I was a girl (a distinct possibility, but not what seems to be the most likely at the moment), I would also have been lying to her (given my aforementioned lack of surety regarding the matter, and the aforementioned non-most-likelihood of this possibility), and, additionally, would likely have merely served to confuse her (given that I'm biologically a guy, and that all of this has only come up very recently).
- Finally, if I told her about identifying as both a boy and a girl at the same time, or as somewhere between the two, or that I'm not entirely sure what I am, I'm certain that that would only have served to bewilder her.
What should I tell her if she outright asks, given that I'm not sure of the answer myself (except that it almost certainly is not as simple as she probably thinks)?
1: Don't worry, she has no issues with her actual father (my uncle); she just likes messing with us (it's something that runs strongly in our family).