I have an 8-year-old daughter and I have had some past issues with kids and feel a lot of guilt. So I really find it hard to believe that strict. But now it has got a little bit of control. She back talks to both me and my fiancé like garbage we continue to try to do nice things for her. I give her rules she doesn't follow any of them.
But one of the biggest issues I have is my fiancé loves her and is very good to her, I mean a lot better than her father. I mean don't get me wrong, her dad loves her, but I feel that is a little bit of a show. Child support never gets paid, more and more excuses not to come and get her on his weekends. Never calls to check on her during the week. So that makes me feel even more guilty.
But back to my fiancé, she runs all over him and that puts me in the middle of it because he doesn't feel it is his place but in the meantime right now I am very sick and unable to work and every dime spent on her comes from him. He keeps a roof over our heads. And drives her to and from school. I am very lucky to have him and so is she. I don't think I am asking my daughter for a lot. Respect both me and my fiancé, no talking back, when I say no to something I mean it, don't ask again. Keep her room clean, clothes put in drawers in order. School clothes hung up and I get nothing from her.
On top of it all her dad when he shows up tells her to lie to not only does she do it but then begs me not to say anything to him about or she gets in trouble grounded. Like she has been grounded for 3 weeks no TV no phone in her room there at his house and she is only allowed out to use the bathroom and get a drink, for not eating broccoli she was throwing up trying to by the time she got home her eyes were swollen, what makes it even better my ex's girlfriend's nieces and sons and even my ex didn't have to eat a bit of broccoli. So that's why she is grounded for 3 weeks. See this is the the things that make me feel horrible.
So please if anyone can lend some advice guidance, anything would be helpful.