I am in an unusual situation. I have two children, a daughter aged nine and a son aged four. I am in a long distance marriage with my wife and children in a city about six hours away, where I go most weekends. My wife is emotionally abusive and about ten months ago I rented a small flat in their city (I couldn't afford anything larger) and said that henceforth I'd be there when I came, and would take the kids. My wife did not want a formal separation and neither did I, so we agreed that it would be "three houses for one family" (i.e. the house in my city and the two houses in theirs) and we'd try to heal. We have been in this kind of half-separation since then, with me coming to her house every time I go for a little while and the kids, and occasionally her, coming to my place on Fridays after school and on Saturdays.
For the first three or four months the kids loved it. However, unfortunately after initial positive signs my wife reverted to her old pattern of behaviour, especially over the last two months, when she has been back in full blown silent treatment and contempt mode. Part of this has been that she has gradually begun to insist more and more with the kids that her house is their house and this house is merely mine, told the kids she misses them and is sad when they come to my place, etc.
My son has mostly been happy to come in any case. My daughter however has gradually begun to resist coming more and more, saying she wanted to be with her friends and in her house, and my son surprised me last week by suddenly saying he didn't want to either. They both said the house is "small", it is "boring", and my daughter compared it to a hotel. I tried to turn things around by planning with them various things they could do to make it more fun. But the next morning my daughter refused to do them, saying that "whatever we do this house will never be fun."
This has really upset me. I plan to try to set up new games etc., things that will help me get them to feel involved in the house and some sense of ownership. I expect my wife will, as usually, convey her disapproval in a passive way to them. What are some things I can do in this situation?
(NB: This isn't a question about my marriage, which I will have to decide about separately, but about what to do right now when I go next weekend...)