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My 4-year-old kid is still bed-wetting. In the past month, he has remained dry two times and the rest wet.

I changed his milk time from 10pm to 7.30pm or 8pm. After that, no liquid allowed. If he is really thirsty, I will give him a little water.

He mostly pees his pants at 1.30am or 3am. I searched online, many recommend to not wake up the kid. But, if he peed his pants already. Should I wake him up to toilet or just change his pants?

I used to wake him up to toilet but some time before he peed his pants. So it's hard to decide on the time to wake him up. After that, when he pees I take him to toilet. Now I have no idea if I should wake him up when he pees or just change the pants and let him sleep.

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    4 year olds bed wetting is more common than you might think. Does he wear training pants?
    – corsiKa
    Commented Jun 8, 2018 at 3:13
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    Does your child wake up after or during the actual peeing?
    – Stephie ♦
    Commented Jun 8, 2018 at 4:17
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    How good is he at going back to sleep? One of mine will basically pee while he’s asleep if I put him near the toilet; is he more like that or will he fully wake?
    – Joe
    Commented Jun 8, 2018 at 13:28
  • @Joe I didn't wake him up. I carry him to toilet then he walks back to his bed.
    – e12345678
    Commented Jun 10, 2018 at 3:42

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My daughter had the problem of wetting the bed at night long after she was able to stay dry during the day. We also noticed that having wet the bed did not wake her up. So we bought an alarm that was two sheets of "paper" with holes and an metal layer coating. Between the two metal layers you put a piece of paper. You'd clip a lead to each of the metal layers. Urine leaks through the holes and the conductivity of the urine trapped in the center paper sheet sets off the alarm. We only had to use the setup a few nights before her full bladder would wake her up enough to go to the bathroom herself.

The overall point is that it takes about a minute to empty a full bladder. The alarm will go off faster than that. So the alarm goes off while the child is still peeing so the brain gets immediate feedback. Waking the child some time after the bed wetting occurs misses that immediate feedback.

As Jonah pointed out it is important to not get angry with the child. Creating more angst will make the problem worse.

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It sounds like you are getting up at that time with him, which is so disruptive for you and for him. Uninterrupted sleep much more important than meeting some arbitrary deadline for not wetting the bed. To that end our almost 7 year old boy still wears diapers overnight. From time to time he will go for a few days without a diaper but always goes back. One of our older kids still had bed wetting episodes at 9/10. My advice- get some diapers, let them figure it out, and let yourself and your kid sleep through the night. Best wishes!

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  • I wouldn't go crazy about it but 9/10 seems way past the average age when bed wetting is controlled.
    – MaxW
    Commented Jun 9, 2018 at 21:40
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    Totally. ;) It has since worked itself out.
    – Jonah Benton
    Commented Jun 9, 2018 at 23:08
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    I was still wetting the bed at age 7. My parents' solution was to teach me to do laundry.
    – Andrew M. Farrell
    Commented Jun 10, 2018 at 20:54
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My son was daytime dry at about 2 years, he was 5 or 6 before he was nighttime dry. Just use pull up nappies.

There is some hormone that gets released to wake you up in the night, that doesn't come in at the same time for everybody.

https://www.nytone.com/blogs/bedwetting-resources/9172029-primary-bedwetting-cause-low-antidiuretic-hormone

How LAH Causes Bedwetting

The antidiuretic hormone is made by nerves in the hypothalamus part of the brain. It helps control blood pressure, and regulate fluid volume in the body by passing it out through urine.

In children under 9 years old, it is very common for little brains to produce a low level of this antidiuretic hormone at night. If your child has LAH, when they go to sleep, since the levels of the hormone drop, and the brain does not inform the bladder that it is full. In essence, the bladder overflows without waking your child. This is how LAH becomes a bedwetting cause in children under 9.

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