My 6-year-old is off to a rough start in Kindergarten. Right when school began she got detention for kicking another kid on the playground. When we asked her why she did it, she said the other kid was making fun of her friend. Asking for more detail she was simply repeating a word that rhymed with her friends name; hardly hard-core bullying. She got detention again in early March for repeatedly stomping on another kid on the playground. She denied it at first, but when we pushed her she admitted that she had done it, but didn't know why.

At Spring Parent-Teacher conferences, her teacher told us that she had threatened to "chainsaw" a boy in her class. I just got another call today that she's getting detention for telling a kid on the playground that she wished he was dead. She's usually such a sweet girl, but she does get in trouble a lot at home for not listening or doing as she's told. She's an only child so there isn't a lot of opportunity for saying those kinds of mean things or hurting others.

I'm frustrated and really concerned. I don't know what to do. Does she need counseling? Is this normal and we just need to keep reminding her that this is not appropriate behavior?

closed as too broad by anongoodnurse Mar 28 at 2:58

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    Do you have the impression she understands, why the things she did were not ok? Or is she just sad/angry/whatever about the detention? – Marzipanherz Mar 27 at 19:27
  • What kind of trouble does she get into at home? A counselor could be a good option, perhaps your child would be able to open up to someone else (as parents we handle things poorly sometimes). I don't think "keep reminding her" is going to do much, as it is after the fact. Need to find the root problem and correct that (proactive versus reactive). – SiXandSeven8ths Mar 27 at 20:01
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    I'm going to go with no, it's not normal for a 6 year old to be threatening violence and death to classmates. (The standing up to a bully story is different, feeling hurt on behalf of a friend is a good sentiment, just handled poorly) I'd get counseling for her...find out where she learned to want to 'chainsaw' people. – swbarnes2 Mar 27 at 21:47
  • Hi, and welcome to the site. This is a very broad question. We would need to know much more detail to be able to give good advice. If you're thinking she might need counseling, you probably should look into it. – anongoodnurse Mar 28 at 3:03
  • @KSMom2018 - please read the Related questions in the sidebar to the right - these may help you frame a specific question, as currently this is far too broad, as anon said. I'd suggest you do find a counsellor to talk through in person in any case. – Rory Alsop Mar 28 at 7:41

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