My 3-years-old boy just started the preschool. He is not listening, he is bored by the activities that the other kids are doing, he hits the children and he is laughing. (it seems like he is having fun). I don't think the preschool teacher is handling it. No changes.

At home he is the same if he's getting bored. He doesn't hit at home but when he gets bored he starts to act very energetically. He needs activities all the time.

What should I do?

  • Can you add more detail? It will help answers to be more useful. For example, what have you done so far? How is the preschool teacher handling it? Have there been any recent changes in your child's life (new sibling, divorce, etc.)? How does he behave out of preschool (at home, on play dates, etc.)? – anongoodnurse Sep 18 '17 at 16:46
  • @MisterPositive - It would be a bad answer indeed. It's a question. ;) And the OP has been asked to add detail. – anongoodnurse Sep 18 '17 at 18:44
  • If he is really bored. Maybe look at different style. Wadolf, montessorie, ect... – the_lotus Sep 19 '17 at 0:18
  • @anongoodnurse - I don't think the preschool teacher is handling it. No changes. At home he is the same if he's getting bored. He needs activities all the time. – Tudor-Radu Barbu Sep 19 '17 at 7:09
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    Who does he hit at home? How do you handle his misbehavior at home? – anongoodnurse Sep 19 '17 at 14:35
up vote 1 down vote accepted

This is only one possibility. There isn't enough info to make this claim, but I like to post it just the same.

I might be the case that your son in gifted and this isn't being properly channeled.

Gifted children tend to learn through experimentation, rather than copying behavior. If this is the case, you should notice that the hitting is not fighting or a power struggle. Instead he experimenting in invoking reactions.

There could be many other reasons, but this might be the case here, as you mentioning him being bored by the activities of his peers. This is not the behavior people typically think of when mentioning gifted, but it is typical at this age nonetheless.

You should also see some of the other characteristics of being gifted. At 3 you may find your son already start to read a little, knows detailed information about subjects that interest him (like a all kind of dinosaur names, car brands, etc) or can learn a second language from watching cartoons.

If think this might be the case, seek help of a support group.

  • it seems like you are so right :) At 3-years-old he can read from books, both in native language and English. Very good memory but no so deep and intense feelings. Is it a solution to move him from this public preschool to a private one? One that focuses more on developing the personality? I think this public preschool doesn't have time for observing him because the group is made from 28 kids. – Tudor-Radu Barbu Sep 19 '17 at 7:03
  • I would argue that this is not the ONLY option, just one of them. Its also possible that the kid just likes to hit people or perhaps doesn't know any other way to express frustration at being bored. We need more info from the OP to be able to tell though. – BunnyKnitter Sep 19 '17 at 15:50
  • Simply moving to private school, might not yield the result you wish. Being in contact with peers is often a good start. I strongly encourage you to contact a local support group. How to properly channel this will be a challenge and will differ from child to child. Unfortunately it's to comprehensive to just give a definitive answer. – Jasny - Arnold Daniels Sep 19 '17 at 17:53
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    Biological age is often of less import than intellectual development. You might start putting him with his intellectual peers (who will be older and larger, more prepared to shut down handle his attacks). – pojo-guy Sep 19 '17 at 21:16

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