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I am 38-year-old mother to a 13-year-old son. He is close friends with a boy (let's call him Alex).

I have noticed earlier Alex behaving weirdly before me like complimenting me on my looks, things I wear. I was uncomfortable and didn't respond warmly to his comments. I avoided them.

Recently, I saw Alex in my room looking at my undergarments drawer (and even holding one in hand). He saw me and he just left, running from there. I was not able to confront him there and talk. I was in kind of a shock myself.

My questions are:

  • Should I confront Alex and talk with or just avoid him?
  • Should I let him on our house again?
  • I don't want my son to be friends with a boy like him. Should I tell my son to stop being friends with Alex. Will it work? Should I let them be friends? How do I make sure Alex won't be a bad influence on my son?
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    Being that your son is close friends, as you say, do you know Alex's parents? What is your relationship to them?
    – threetimes
    Commented Sep 10, 2017 at 18:19
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    This is a conversation for his parents to confront their child. In the interim enact strict guidelines for visitors.
    – DankyNanky
    Commented May 25, 2018 at 10:12

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Whether at 13 or 30, creepy is creepy. Let it be known that this boy is not welcome in your home and why. If the kid is going through a growth phase, he needs to learn that making people uncomfortable is not acceptable. If he's honestly dangerous to have around you, you need to look after your safety.

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  • A lock on the door might be helpful, as well.
    – PoloHoleSet
    Commented May 22, 2018 at 21:12
  • Complimenting somebody on his/her look is not creepy as such. Complimenting in a flirting way might be for a 30 , but even more for a 13. And looking to somebody undergaments is always creepy from puberty on, I would say...
    – Laurent S.
    Commented May 24, 2018 at 13:28
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This is definitely something to tell Alex's parents about. They are in the best position to deal with it.

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