I have a very sweet 7 year old son who is struggling with making friends and specifically he wants a best friend. He has opportunity to see kids often but cannot seem to click with anyone and really wants to. There are some obstacles that I can name with hopes someone has additional ideas that we haven't yet tried.
He is highly intelligent, especially related to computers and science and loves to talk about those topics, which is generally lost on many people, even those much older than he is. He talks too softly. I do not think this is confidence, as he does it with me at home too. He has done that since he started talking, and he will speak up when asked, but reverts immediately back to quiet talking. He is often ignored when speaking because people actually do not realize he is talking to them, adults and children alike. He is also a tad on the small size for age and so that paired with no athletic inclination or interest, makes it hard for him to click with many boys his age here as most seem to be very into sports.
We homeschool, and he gets along fine with kids in the groups, and other activities he has been in, he just doesn't really bond or seem to find someone he "fits" with. I have never seen him have any argument with another child or even friction. He is very easy going and not the sort that would irritate others easily. He just seems to float around near people versus with people if that makes sense.
I have tried all I know to help him have access to places to meet more kids. I give him pep talks telling him to just join in and have fun (and he does, but he wants more than just playing in a group). He actually cries about this sometimes. His siblings haven't had this issue so it's new to me. If he was at peace with this, I wouldn't mind. I do not think you have to have a best friend at 7.
So other than homeschool groups, sports, dance, parks and the like, are there other places I might be overlooking where I might locate more kids to meet? I actually think, based on his personality, that if he didn't have siblings and see them have friends, he wouldn't even likely be that worried about it. He really does enjoy time alone and he is a close match in disposition to his father, who is really not much of a "people person". He likes people just fine, he just tends to prefer solitude if given a choice and always has. That leads me to the second thought and question which is whether I should really even be trying so hard to sort out finding him a friend (I do not tell him that is why we are going here or doing this or that, but it does motivate me to attend certain events, etc). I am not sure how much effort or concern I should be placing on this.
To be clear, he is generally very well liked. I get told all the time what a great kid he is, and other children do seem to like him. He just hasn't found anyone that he seems to really find a connection with. He is quirky and funny and quiet. He has no indications that he has any social anxiety or impairments in any regard on relating other than having such specific interests in things that are well beyond his age level. He also gets along very well with his brother that is a few years older and they are close, so he does have a child in his life he can share secrets with, etc.