My newborn does not want to sleep at night

Question

My 10-day-old daughter is having big problems with sleeping on early evening and night. Whenever she get put down in her bassinet after getting fed she starts crying. Sometimes she needs to be changed. She cries and scream out loud when we do that and we don't know why.

It has been 3 days and she only sleep about 8 or 9 hours a day. So her routine is get fed, put down in bassinet, cry, change diaper, cry, get fed, put down to bassinet, cry, change diaper, etc. It always happens around 10pm to 4am, sometime 5pm. She stays awake around 4-5 hours each time.

Answer 1

That sounds relatively normal.

Note that a newborn has no concept of day and night yet - at least in the sense of what is a time for activity or sleeping. Even older babies that have good "sleeping habits" often get an early evening bout of activity - the time window in the evening many working dads (and moms) enjoy.

Also, being put down in the bassinet to sleep will work with some, but most certainly not with all babies, especially very young ones.

So for now, if your baby demands to be held and stays awake at night, you'll have to live with it for a bit. If you encourage "playing" and interacting during the day and are caring, but "boring" during the night, she'll get it eventually. Any other kind of "sleep training" would be futile and uncalled for.

Answer 2

This sounds quite normal. If you are sleeping in the same room as the baby, they can smell your lactation and in my experience then tend to wake up more and tend to be more hungry. Cosleeping also intensifies you response to their cries, every whimper you are instant access, which debatably creates a situation where the little one doesn't have time to learn how to self sooth.

But in your case it sounds all quite normal for such an early age, just try and sleep when the kiddo does and come back in 6 months if conditions don't improve.

Answer 3

First I want to say, although it may be "normal", what you are going through is hard. Every baby is different, some babies sleep all the time and others are a little more... vocal. Your baby is still very young, so at this stage I would recommend focusing on answering to her needs the best you can. Don't overthink about what is normal or not, don't try to "fix" the baby, don't impose a schedule or whatever. At this stage your baby needs your help to learn that the world is a secure and loving place. Then slowly, the hard newborn days will pass.

That being said, I would suggest three things. First, your newborn needs a lot of sleep (up to 17-20 hours a day). Let your baby sleep as much as needed during the day and provide a calm environment. Avoid over stimulation: at this point, your face, your voice and your loving arms is more than enough stimulation for your little one! Sleeping often during the day will not prevent the baby from sleeping during the night. In fact, at some point your baby will start consolidating her sleeping periods during the day and it is associated with sleeping longer stretches through the night.

Second, you can start right now to help your baby learn the difference between night and day. For example, you could feed your baby and have her nap near you during the day in the living room or another room with natural light. Get outside everyday if possible for a walk with the stroller, etc. At night, and for the last feed of the day, set a different routine, for example sit in a darkened room. When the baby wakes at night, keep her in her room to feed and change and avoid talking or signing to her. If she cries or stay awake at night, try to comfort her in ways that will not disrupt the message that it is night time: rocking, shushing back to sleep, etc. At this point don't be overly concerned about creating bad habits for sleep. The most important thing is to help your baby learn the difference between day and night and that her bed is a safe place!

Third, you could start looking into the EASY routine. Your baby might be too young yet, but I found this technique very helpful for providing a routine for my babies. Basically, you try to order things so when the baby wakes, you feed her, then it is activity time, then sleep time. Then you always redo things in this order so the baby eventually develops a handle of how things are supposed to be. It also helps to prevent sleep associations with feeding (during the day, at least). It is a very flexible way to slowly install a routine in your baby's life and yours.

Lastly, you are still learning about your baby but never forget that you are the one who knows her best. If you have any concern, talk to your healthcare provider. My first had silent reflux and our life was hell before he got treatment for it. So yes, babies cry a lot, but there is no harm in checking out if everything is within the range of "normal" with your pediatrician.

Answer 4

Don't worry as others have said this is all perfectly normal. here are the things that confused me most.

I had read books which said my baby should be going to bed at 7, my babies bedtime was 11, I gradually got it down to 7 as he got older.

Have you heard of cluster feeding? I hadn't http://www.babies.co.uk/feeding/a/cluster-feeding/

during night time try to keep everything as dull as dishwater, quiet, dark and peaceful so nighttime doesn't become funtime.