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My new born daughter is 1 week old. In the past 3 days, I was responsible for burping her at home. I saw in the hospital that the nurses burp babies very hard and I kind of learned that I should do so.

At home, I sometimes burp my baby with blanket covered in her back or without it. I thought I was doing it right until my mother in law said I was burping her a bit forcefully... I started to worry about whether I may hurt the baby's internal organs or other parts, but she seems to be enjoyable and not resistant when I burp her and she's just doing fine everyday. I am so paranoid right now ...

  • You could consider getting those bottles with the deflatable "bottle condom" inserts (forgot what they're called) to help reduce the need for burping. We used those exclusively when mine was tiny. – I wrestled a bear once. Aug 17 '17 at 15:49
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It's not possible to say for sure if you are being "too forceful" without seeing it, but I doubt it.

If this is the 1st child for you, the best info I can offer is this. There will always be someone (often people related to you) who will come along to tell you what you are doing "wrong". It starts already & seems to never end as far as I can tell. My older ones are grown, youngest is 3 and still my mother has to sometimes tell me "I should..."

And the paranoia, well that will ease a little with time. It's intense having a new baby. Everything is so new, you are just getting to try to figure out what this baby's normal is and there are so many changes in that first years especially. Try to trust yourself a little. If you are invested emotionally and trying to connect, you will will get to know your baby and feel more confident as you get to know her better.

Congratulations on the baby.

If it would make you feel better, there are lots of medically produced burping technique videos to watch. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgcWOzauLxI

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  • i can sent you a video clip on how i burp my baby if allowed? Appreciate your help so much! my email address is 'mikefanzhang@gmail.com', u can email me on your address. Thanks! – Michael Fan Zhang Aug 17 '17 at 6:14
  • Apparently burping a baby isn't really necessary at all (though mine seemed to quite enjoy it). I'll try and dig up a link when I'm less tired. If in doubt I would always err on the side of caution when it comes to applying any kind of force to a newborn. A bit of gas will not do any harm.) – Marianne013 Aug 17 '17 at 12:13
  • @Marianne013 I've never heard anyone claim that burping was a nessecity but it keeps the baby comfortable.. has can lead to a pissed off screaming kid which can lead to more stress and paranoia for the parent. – I wrestled a bear once. Aug 17 '17 at 15:04
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There are many different approaches, and almost all of them are right. Of course you now get used to do things a certain way. 25 years from now, if you see a novice doing things completely different from how you remember doing it, you may be tempted to offer advice like that, too.

If a something you hear troubles you, find a way to verify with an experienced third party. That's exactly what you did by asking on this message board, but for a question like this I suggest to look for places where you can ask experienced people in person.

Depending on where you live, your insurance may already cover a couple visits of a midwife during the first weeks, or there's a free midwife service provided by your town where parents can pass by every second Wednesday, or a hospital/church has a volunteer-staffed weekly advice afternoon, etc. Depending on where you live, there should also be a doctors visit when she's 1-4 weeks old, so that may be coming up soon. Just write these questions down and ask the experts. In the meantime you can be a bit more gentle just to be on the safe side.

To burp my daughter I merely held her upright at my chest, sometimes she burped, sometimes she didn't, and it didn't actually matter.

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