There is nothing in this world which you can control outside your physical body.
So you can transform yourself.
So the trick is not to run away from the fact that you are scared or you are a shy girl, just observe the shyness, observe the fear, observe how the breathing is changing in you, observe the mind.
Here is a quote from Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh's book "be free where you are".
(In this chapter Thich Nhat Hanh is talking to prisoners about how to handle feeling overwhelmed by a strong emotion.)
So when you notice that an emotion is beginning to come up, it is very
important that you put yourself in a stable sitting position, or you
lie down, which is also a very stable position. Then focus your
attention on your belly. Your head is like the top of a tree in a
storm. I would not stay there. Bring your attention down to the trunk
of the tree, where there is stability.
When you have focused on your belly, bring your attention down to the
level just below the naval and begin to practice mindful breathing.
Breathing in and breathing out deeply, be aware of the rise and fall
of the abdomen. After practicing like this for 10, 15, or 20 minutes
you will see that you are strong - strong enough to withstand the
storm. (page 38)
Do not even think about changing your parents or anyone, instead of trying to control anything, try to control your mind.
SOLUTION OF SUFFERING
The essence of solution is purity of mind
Pure mind is always free from Anger hatred lust happiness (Happiness is also suffering because if you are happy it is the nature's law that you will be sad) answer is remain aware in happiness.
So now how to make the mind pure
This brings a lot of work for you, start with being aware of the breathing (just feel the sensation where it touches inside your nostrils)
Mind will not allow this, but if you do it for 3 days, you will find you are able to tie your mind with your breathe.
Now you will live in the moment and this is just the beginning.
Yes for 13 year old, above stuff may go over the head. But when you read it carefully you will definitely find something useful.
Yes you can not change them but if you can talk to your Teacher/Guide who can try to make them understand how fighting can affect the behavior/Character of their child.