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How young is too young to have a cell phone? My 11 year old spends weekends away from mom and I need to keep in touch.

  • 1
    28. None of us had phones when we were kids. You can get a prepaid that only calls for emergencies, but really even adults don't need smart phones. – Kai Qing Jan 20 '17 at 1:22
  • @KaiQing unless the other home does not have a landline and this parent wants contact and her child to have contact without a problem from the other parent... I know a guy who will not let his kids talk to their mom on his time and uses 'minutes' as his reason. Both parents should always have access if the custody agreement allows it. The guy could be taken to court but a cell phone is an easier solution. There are controls on that specific phone. My own kid does not ever need my permission to talk with her dad. – WRX Jan 20 '17 at 1:33
  • You mean cellphone, to make phone calls, or more like a smartphone, to use internet and so on? – woliveirajr Jan 20 '17 at 13:23
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If you can make sure that your child has no unsupervised internet access, and can only call and receive calls from people approved by you, and not use it unless you need them to... then sure. It might make a difference where you live.

My 16 y/o has one and I still check to see who calls and she has no internet access because we do not pay for it. She can use the net at school and in the family room.

3

You asked specifically about cell phones, not smartphones. I think 11 is fine for a cell phone. I got my first cell phone when I was 8 because my school was 20km away from home and my dad wanted to make sure I could call him anytime. I do also think having a smartphone can still wait a few years because unlimited Internet access can be very distracting in school and social life. I even know lots of adults who can't handle that.

The fact I am still sitting on my bed typing this with my phone even though I have to be at work in 20min should be indication enough!

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Our kids got phones when they started middle school (11 years old), since that's when they were frequently taking buses, staying after school for activities, visiting friends, etc. The phones were originally for emergency use (we envisioned things like "My bus is broken down", "A snow storm has closed the roads but I'm safe in the school"), but we now use them for much more routine things ("My bus was ten minutes late but I'm OK", "My soccer practice is over, can you come pick me up", "My friend I'm staying with wants to take me to the pool, is that OK?"). It gives the kids more freedom to do stuff on their own while still keeping us informed.

The older kid got one of the non-smart pre-paid phones at first, but by the time the younger one was 11, there were old hand-me-down smart phones in the house that he inherited. Is there potential for abuse? Sure, but not so much in school, since teachers are very, very aware of phone usage and there are strict rules on even turning your phone on in the schools. At home, it's just another screen, and your screen-time rules, whatever they are, apply to that as well.

Smartphones are also, surprisingly, a real help with study and homework. Not only for group assignments, where they chatter back and forth through text messages, but you might be surprised how much group help gets done through phones. Student group chats spontaneously arise for each class, the digital equivalents of study groups that also appear in coffee shops and so on before exams.

There are concerns about theft and loss. Eleven-year-old kids are not always the most responsible and consistent, and phone theft in the classroom is a real issue (it happened to our younger, and we heard that he was not unique). If that's a potential concern, consider a cheap prepaid phone, where the loss is not a disaster.

Overall, we have no problems with either of our kids having phones from age 11 on.

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If there's some specific reason for her to have it, then 11, or even younger is fine. Just stress the importance of not giving out her number to anyone without your permission.

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My son got his phone when he was 8 years old. My daughter will get hers when she is 7 y/o.

Both parents in our family are working so we need to get in touch with our kids. If kids have something to worry they need means to contact parents, that's why they will have phones.

My son is rule oriented person so he had only once or twice problem with cell phone playing. He has one hour gaming time each day. Usually he spends it playing PS3 with his friends. His morals are the only things restricting his playing.

  • Welcome to Parenting SE! – WRX Jan 20 '17 at 13:15

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