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My daughter wants me to create a Facebook account for her; I told her no. But I didn't really think about what she wanted me to do for her. I have Facebook and she sees me on it all the time, so she wants an account. I dont know if its ok for n 11 year-old to have Facebook account. She feels bad because all her friends have Facebook and their all the same age. I'm not sure what to do with this situation, whether to create one for her or just be stern and say stick with 'No'.

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    Facebook doesn't allow people under the age of 13 to have accounts because of US laws. – user19912 Nov 27 '16 at 19:36
  • @Leopoldo Sparks: She wants me to change the year of birth so she can have one. – LOSTinNEWYORK Nov 27 '16 at 19:37
  • Seriously be extremely careful with Facebook. They track every single data you post and you will never delete it. – Bradman175 Dec 10 '16 at 6:25
  • Yes, facebook tracks an unbelievable amount of data on its users, and sells it: salimvirani.com//facebook Setting up a facebook account for her could actually have serious lasting consequences for her digital footprint. – Rose Hartman May 29 '17 at 3:28
  • One added wierdness: in the US if you break the acceptable use policies on a website like Facebook, you are committing a federal felony. eff.org/deeplinks/2013/01/… – Paul Johnson May 29 '17 at 6:36
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Create one with her She is 11 and close to puberty, if puberty starts to kick in you will loose most of your control over her and she will start to follow her own head. if you wait till then you are dooming her to make all the mistakes by herself, like uploading things she shouldn't or post private data.

If you do it now, you can teach her how to behave online and to stay save. She can learn from your experience and avoid many bad mistakes.

And ignore these age restriction nonsense. Age restrictions these days are pulled out of thin air from old people that can't do more than open a window in Windows, if these people would have to live with the consequences of their age restriction, they would be different.

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    Age restrictions on websites have to do with privacy concerns surrounding personally identifiable information (PII) of minors. While it's arguable how effective this is (the age restriction really just means Facebook isn't liable if some 10-year-old gets their information shared without permission), I would not call it "nonsense". It's certainly worth having a conversation about why those age limits exist, and why you as a parent are choosing to break the rules. – Acire Nov 28 '16 at 12:45
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    No they have to do, with the fact, that by law, children are not responsible for their actions but the adults around them, which includes facebook. If facebook allows children under 12, they are fully responsible for what they are seeing. A risk that a website can't take. And under 16 and 18 they have to prove that they did everything to hide "bad content", which is why they censor as hard as they do. Most sides and forums directly limit to 18 and older simply to prevent lawsuits against them just because someone cursed on their side and a child saw it before the administrator. – Etaila Nov 28 '16 at 12:53
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    I was speaking specifically about COPPA, which is the law that leads to 13-year-old limits on Facebook, StackExchange, and such. That one is due to privacy (it's in the name of the act). – Acire Nov 28 '16 at 13:56
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    In short the law says that a side where a child wants to participate, has to tell the parents in detail what they are doing with the private data of the child. But that law is just a more strict version of the privacy agreement, that adults have to agree to as well, redirected at parents because children can't agree by law. This wouldn't be a reason to completely block children or minors from websites, it would just be another check box for the parents agreement. The reason for total age restrictions are child protection laws, since the moderation that would be necessary would be too much. – Etaila Nov 28 '16 at 14:11
  • This answer leads to even more kids wanting to have an FB account at 11 - because if you actually create an account with her, she'll be part of the group of peers that pressure others into it. – Pascal Jul 2 '17 at 16:54
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If it is against the rules on Facebook and your child is asking you as a parent to lie or cheat for her, the answer has to be no. You are the bar. The up side is she is still asking you.

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    Being the moral high ground will be very useful when an online fight damages the life of a 15 year old because she never learned not to post pictures of herself, her address or real name online. Nobody gives a damn if you are paying the consequences of their laws, so at least in important things like your own children, think for yourself because you and your children will pay for the mistakes not the 60 year old + idiot that wrote that law on his typewriter. – Etaila Nov 29 '16 at 21:20
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    Not sure why the kid will be unable to learn that at 13 when she is allowed to use FB legally. I understand you disagree Ismalith. My kid was able to learn with parental supervision at 13. The rule means that not only is the comp in a common area, but I am there when she is on FB -- and she's 16 now, has lots of friends and gets into all sorts of normal troubles. – WRX Nov 29 '16 at 23:05
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    The problem is, that if children get into puberty, they start to follow their own head, if something you say doesn't make sense to them they will ignore it and if you are there and "force" them that way to follow your advice, they will quit it as soon as your not besides them anymore. Before puberty you have a better connection and children will follow and keep advice even if they don't understand it. That doesn't mean that you can't be successful to teach an 18 year old something, it is just far less effective. – Etaila Dec 1 '16 at 8:18
  • If more parents actually followed WRX's suggestion and upheld the "no under-thirteens" terms of FB, then most likely eleven-year-old kids wouldn't have a problem with NOT having an account, since all their peers wouldn't have one, either. And it's the "they need to get in contact with the technology now or they'll miss out" mindset which pushes parents into providing access for their kids. I'm a CS graduate, I love computers, but I wish kids would find other things to do at 11 years old than hang out on FB, and I'm very much in favor of parents acting to reduce peer pressure. – Pascal Jul 2 '17 at 16:44
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Facebook specifically states that a user must be 13 years of age in order to create an account.

Even though your daughters' friends are all on facebook and somehow have accounts (i'm assuming are also less than 13 years of age), you have to teach your daughter that it's important to follow the rules. It's important to teach her that these rules are in place for a reason. It's to protect her and boys/girls that are younger than 13.

The other alternative that you may want to consider is creating a 'family' account, so she can communicate with her friends, but she's also aware (and others) that all activity can/will be monitored by the household and parents.

Best of luck,

TT

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When my daughter asked for a Facebook account, I said yes, and sat with her as she tried to put in her information, knowing that Facebook's terms of service restrict user accounts to 13 year olds and older.

She wasn't old enough, and Facebook told her so. She begain to change her birthdate, to make it look like she's old enough, but I stopped her.

I said I said you can have a Facebook. I didn't say you could lie. Saying you were born two years ago isn't true. If they won't allow kids under 13, you'll just have to wait. I don't care what "all" of your friends do. I'm not their dad, but I am yours and I am responsible for you."

Additional Warning: Make sure you check her mobile phone/computer/etc. There are many prediators out there who prey on young girls. A girl my daughter went to school with was murdered by a man she was interacting with online. We live in a peaceful, rural community so it can happen to anyone.

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I know that times change, and social media is trending now, so it's understandable she wants to fit in, but she's too young, not just because Facebook said so.

I think the best would be to sit down with her, and discuss the whole thing. I don't think you should allow her to create an account, but if you just say so, you would only be distancing yourself from her.

Ask her why she wants to use Facebook, why she needs it. I bet she doesn't have really important reasons, she's only 11, it's just a peer-pressure kind of thing, but listen to her anyway. Let her feel, you care about what she thinks and feels, and you just want what is best for her.

Tell her, how important it is to be trustworthy - follow the rules of Facebook, and follow the rules in general. Also, you need to discuss the dangers of social media, and the Internet, even though she probably thinks she knows it all.

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