My partner has ADHD, she has stopped taking her medication for almost two years. As a result she developed a very selfish behaviour and our relationship has ended apart from the fact that we still live under the same roof with our two children.
I have agreed to let her stay (my house and I am the working one) because I don't want me to children to suffer. If I kick her out she would drag the children with her and go seek help from housing section of a city where her sister lives. She refused to give up on the children because she wants the benefits money. She wants to be close to her sister because her sister lives a (free) life on drug and has no responsibilities after she abandoned her 4 children.
To summarize it I accepted my partner under my roof because if she takes the children with her they will suffer lots and end up in a very unpleasant environment.
The options I have:
- Kicker her out, keep the children with me. Not an option as I can't take of the children, I work for long hours, can't afford a nanny.
- Let her leave with the children. Not an option as she wants to take them to a very bad environment.
- Let her leave then report her to the social services, the children might end up in a foster and I cant have them
- Report her to the doctor and inform them that she stopped her medication, the GP will contact the social services and they might take the children
The solution I came up with:
I let her stay, she takes care of the children and I pretend not to notice that she is sexting when she is in and cheating when she is out
The problem I am having:
She isn't doing her duties towards the children, she is on the phone and playing Xbox almost 18 hours a day Children aren't getting fed properly, they are dirty all the time, the house is extremely dirty. She does not beat the children but they are severely neglected. She refuse to take her medication, she becomes violent some time with me NOT with the children. Some of her ADHD problems: she thinks it's normal to ignore all her duties, she blames everything on anybody but herself, she is very selfish as in using the children's TV or having their food.
Should I report her to the social services? what that help in anyway other than having my children taken away from me and staying in foster care? Or should I just live the solution I came up with? the children are not in foster care but neglected.
Some facts to consider:
- The children are 4 and 2 years old, a boy a girl
- My partner had a very bad life of neglect in her childhood and she has been raped by her biological father.
- Her sister is a very bad influence.
- My partner is very known to the social services as she has abandoned other children she had from other relationships 5 times.
- One of my children is disabled.
- We live in the UK