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This question goes to the people who have read the "Baby whisperer" where the author talks about the 4s of winding down. The 3rd S is "sitting". It's not clear what that means. "Sit with him quietly for around five minutes with him in the vertical position." what does that mean? Is that the same thing as picking him up and you are sitting a vertical position? Or is he sitting on the cot in a vertical position with him? Who is sitting? Is the baby sitting or is the parent sitting?

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The "sitting" S in the 4S's part of Tracy Hogg's Sleep Whisperer system refers to the parent, not the child. The child is in their cot, the parent is sitting on a chair near the cot. Sometimes the parent is sitting near enough to the cot to be able to put a hand on the child to so a "shush pat" (the fourth part of the 4S's).

Some children are going to be reassured by the close presence, and some are going to be kept awake by it, and Tracy Hogg's method relies on the parent knowing what's best for their child. It's not a rigid method of timetables and prescriptive rules.

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I scratched my head with this as well. I take it to mean parent sitting with child upright in their arms with child's head nestled into parent's neck or shoulder (to block out visual stimuli). I always struggled with this because after about 30 seconds, baby would start crying, so started shh-patting him on my shoulder... Which elongated everything. Tonight, when Max started crying while we sat, I just held him... No cuddles, no shifting, no patting, nothing... I just held him to me firmly. It broke my heart. After about 5 minutes (or what felt like forever), he stopped crying. I settled him in his cot with a kiss (and damp eyes), and he babbled and waved for a bit, and then went to sleep. The way the sit stage is written is so ambiguous. Baby sleep guide elaborates on it a bit, which is where I got my interpretation from (author says instead of shh patting in the sit stage, its better to let them cry- http://www.mybabysleepguide.com/2009/07/four-s-wind-down-ritual.html). I might be wrong. However, I'm hoping that I'm not and that the tears during the sit stage lessen.

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  • Hi, Dani, and welcome to the site! :-) Mar 8, 2016 at 21:02

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