I have 3.5 month healthy baby girl and my wife and I seem to manage very well. I do not rely on other people and I am quite aware what others are able to do and how much effort goes into something. My wife has been truly wonderful throughout the entire pregnancy process, and I would like to show my appreciation of all that she has gone through and all that she has done. My problem is that I do not want my wife to think I'm rewarding her, instead of showing my honest and heartfelt appreciation.

(I should mention she quite a smart person and besides physics she has a degree in behavioral sciences.)

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    I hope you do not mind, but I have taken the liberty of rephrasing your question. I hope that I have properly captured what you intended to ask, as it is my belief that the wording of your original post may have given some people the wrong idea of what you were looking for. If I have made any mistakes, or don't properly describe your question, please feel free to make further edits, or even revert to your original version if I got it completely wrong.
    – user420
    Sep 19, 2014 at 17:14
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    I have never been wrong with flowers. Sep 19, 2014 at 18:59
  • @Beofett, for me, the rewrite changed the whole meaning and tone of the question. May 11, 2015 at 4:07

2 Answers 2


Congratulations! The first thing that comes to my mind is to treat her to something nice that you know she will appreciate. Massages, dinners, whatever it might be.

In particular, in the extent that breastfeeding allows, give her as much time off (away from the baby) as you can manage. By definition she will be spending a lot of time with your daughter and she will be wanting some breaks from it.

Even small things count. You can change all diapers whenever you're home, and you can take your daughter for a walk (in a pram) for an hour or two while your wife can relax at home. Don't just arrange for somebody else to take care of your baby -- it's important that it's you doing these things instead of her.

The idea I want to convey is that you could try to show her that you want to to reduce her burden because that shows you're aware that she has a burden.

  • One of the best advice I have had so far, thank you.
    – Margus
    May 14, 2015 at 11:04

Hmm, help her out with the baby.

If she needs a little break ,be there to assist with the babies needs. and that may mean that you take baby for walk, change diapers, or even give baby a bath, while mom takes it easy.

You may be a starting mister mom with this, but in your wives eyes, she will regard you as an angel dear for helping her.

Besides, all moms don't mind having a pamper day whether they are at a spa , eating out with friends, or even just shopping out by themselves, or even having a few hours away relaxing likewise.

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