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We were informed yesterday by our 5 year old granddaughter that mommy and this other woman were naked and kissing on the lips. This is the first we have ever heard or known about this. She has always had boyfriends and has never shown lesbian behavior. Not only that but this woman about 50 and my granddaughter is about 30, is homeless, bald head with a swastika on the back, big drug addict. Should we call CPS?

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    What is CPS? Is this a US specific thing? – Dave Clarke Aug 2 '14 at 21:17
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    @DaveClarke I believe the OP is referring to child protective services (a US government agency that can step in in situations of abuse or neglect). – user420 Aug 2 '14 at 21:42
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    Downvote: This question is going to need quite a lot of clarification before it can be answered properly. – James Snell Aug 2 '14 at 21:44
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    Downvoted because the question appears to be about a granddaughter with multiple issues and calling CPS while the title reflects a sexuality bias only. – Sylas Seabrook Aug 3 '14 at 1:34
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    Sigh... when people wonder why we fight so hard for equality, it's because of people who are more concerned with their children being around a lesbian (gasp) than a Neo-Nazi homeless drug addict. – user6589 Jul 16 '15 at 14:28
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Your question needs some clarification but here's my answer. What is the reason that you think you need to call CPS?

You mention finding out that your daughter is gay from her daughter. Is the issue that she is gay?

You also imply that she is a neo-nazi, homeless and a drug addict. She was these things before and you didn't feel the need to intercede.

The only things that would raise a flag to me is if she was having sex (what I assume you imply by "naked and kissing") in front of her daughter. Gay or straight that's not appropriate. Of course she wouldn't be the first kid to walk in on 2 adults being intimate. Not something that requires CPS. Maybe something that needs some honest communication. Expressing concern that your daughter wasn't being discreet and that her daughter saw them being intimate wouldn't be out of line. If she didn't know that your grand-daughter witnessed them that's resolves that issue. If she did, and explained what she and her partner were doing, and told her daughter to knock on the door first, again problem solved. If she was having sex blatantly in front of her kid, then that's something else entirely.

But if your only objection is that she is gay, and somehow that means her child is in danger, then you are wrong. There are a number of other things that you imply with your question that might be risk factors, but suddenly finding out that she is gay does not make her a bad parent.

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    I believe the OP means that the other woman is the bald nazi drug addict. It's not the gayness that's the big issue here. – superluminary Jul 16 '15 at 23:00
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Who is homeless, your daughter or her girlfriend? Is your granddaughter homeless?

Do you have any reason to assume you granddaughter is in any danger other than your personal distaste of her choice of her mother's companion? Because if you don't have any reason to suspect abuse, all you'll be doing is saddling your daughter with a false accusation and cutting off any influence you have and likely never see your granddaughter again.

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No.

Firstly, from your post, there is no indication of abuse occurring, assuming the child seeing the naked kissing was on accident.

Secondly, your granddaughter is allowed to date anyone at any age or of any gender, race, or creed she wants. She's 30 which is 12 years past being a legal adult.

Lack of evidence of abuse won't fly for CPS. A lesbian relationship is also irrelevant in the context of child rearing. It's not contagious; it's not a disease. Don't treat it like one.

  • "5 year old granddaughter that mommy and this other woman were naked" - Seems to be enough of a worry no matter what the gender/sexuality of people involved is. – user3143 Aug 13 '14 at 16:33
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    @user3143, as much as I hate to ask, you never accidentally walked in on your parents ?(gross) – SomeShinyMonica Aug 16 '14 at 23:38
  • No, I never did. I learned to knock very early in my life, and to respect people's privacy as well. – user3143 Aug 17 '14 at 15:32
  • "It's a choice"? Source? – user6589 Jul 16 '15 at 14:25

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