We have been co-sleeping since my daughter was a newborn until last month when we finally converted a small room to be her room. She is 32 months old. She has her own Twin bed now. The problem is: I can't sleep without being next to her. I have always been a terrible sleeper - taking an hour or two laying there to fall asleep. When we had the baby, I couldn't sleep when we put her in the crib because I was paranoid not hearing her breathe even though she was in the same room. So we co-slept and my mind was at ease.

As a result I have become an incredibly light sleeper. I was never a deep sleeper to start but because of co-sleeping, the tiniest movements or sounds could wake me. Now when I try to sleep in the next room, I feel like I am just waiting for her to call me in the middle of the night and I go and sleep with her.

I wanted to go on an overnight with a girlfriend but I am afraid I won't be able to sleep and it will be a miserable trip. I feel like I need to get over this before I do that so I don't waste my money.

Other things to note: I am the primary person doing the bedtime routine but my husband does participate more on the weekends when he is home earlier to read her books. I am also pregnant so I won't take sleeping pills or the like.

I am training her to stay in her room for bedtime without me laying there now. But the problem is how will I sleep? Anybody else go through this? What did you do?

  • I think if you go away you will know in the back of your head that your daughter is not there and cannot call you and you will sleep very well.
    – user6365
    Jan 6, 2014 at 12:18

2 Answers 2


I will offer thoughts on my plan:

Just like my daughter, I think it just takes getting used to and I just need to practice. Also I think adults could benefit from a bedtime routine as well which I don't have. I also don't have a set wake up time so I would implement that as well as being conscious of other factors:

  • eating 3 hours before bed
  • doing a non-stimulating activity to wind down such as reading or yoga/meditation
  • setting a time restriction for the computer/phone
  • adding more exercise to my day
  • You might also try having some extra warmth near you - for example, we got a cat that started sleeping on the bed right near where my daughter used to at about the time she started sleeping in her own bed more reliably (total coincidence). Seems like a water bottle or an extra pillow you hug a little at first to warm up might help while you transition. Jan 7, 2014 at 14:16
  • It should be noted, you should not exercise (or even necessarily do yoga) shortly before bed; try to leave a few hours before going to sleep after working out. Computer screens also emit a light frequency that makes you less drowsy. Either get off the computers/iPads/etc a couple hours before bed, or use something like f.lux which can help alleviate the issue.
    – Doc
    Jan 23, 2014 at 20:21

To add to Rhea's answer:

There are special excersises for preagnant women. They are designed to be safe for both future mommy and her baby, are beneficial for your health (and therefore for your baby's health) and, which is why I'm writing this here, being moderately physically tired will help you go to sleep. You must watch out not to over exercise during first few sessions, at least until you know your capabilities.

You can also try some herbal teas. Melissa is safe when drunk in reasonable amounts. If in doubt, ask your doctor if you can drink one cup in the evening. It should help you soothe your mind and let you fall asleep more easily.

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