16mo still not walking, I think it's my fault?

Question

On Thanksgiving my baby girl took her first two steps by herself. When this happened the six people that were around her at the time, including myself, flipped out and started clapping and got really excited and praised her for such a good job. This was probably at an extreme kind of level. You could tell it startled her and she has been unable to do it since. She has actually digressed backwards now in a bad kind of way.

• She REFUSES to try to even stand on her own
• Her walking has gotten much worse and she is really wobbly now
• You can tell she is afraid to walk
• She trust full heartedly that someone will be there to catch her

People have mentioned that she seems scared when trying to walk now as well. She can walk pretty much fine as long as she is holding onto a finger or something else connected to us. Once we break the connection she then throws her body backwards head first like she is trying to do a backwards rainbow lol. Its adorable but obviously very dangerous and makes it very hard to even practice with her.

I was wondering if any of you have experienced this and have any advise on how I can get her back on her feet and not so scared? We really thought she would be walking by Christmas by how well she WAS doing, but now.. it seems she is only getting worse :/

Follow up

Instead of commenting on each answer I'll give a general on here. First, I want to say thanks for the support and reassurance that I/we didn't damage her. As far as walking, she has a "cage" one of those colorful gates that go around in a circle. She spends a lot of time in there walking around in circles, at times she even stands without holding anything while she moves her hands to the next section. I also walk with her every day all around the house, she holds my finger and once she has that comfort she just about runs around the house with little assistance from my finger. It seems to really depend on what shoes she is wearing, if any at all, how well she can walk. It's like I believe she could really walk without holding anything if she would just try, but instead, like mentioned above, she immediately throws herself backwards or sits down.

We have tried having mommy in front of me with a toy she really likes to entice her to come but she will hold onto what she can stretch as far as she can but refuses to let go lol. The walker helped a lot but I also feel it kind of messed up her idea of walking as well. She is always trying to walk by pushing forward on her tippy toes which is cute but not effective when really trying to walk. We also have a large cube that she stands up and plays with while holding on but perhaps I will try one of those play tables, they sound like a good idea either way. Again, thanks for all the feedback!

Follow Up #2 She has started walking about 3 weeks ago. She just decided one day it was time and started getting up on her own and wobbling around. Now she is running around the house, especially when she has something she shouldn't! lol. Thanks for the support :)

Answer 1

You may have tried this already... get some toys/games that require her to stand up in order to play with them. One example would be a "music table" which has different buttons to push, levers to pull and things to spin around, each causing the toy to make different sounds and/or play music. In order to access each individual gizmo, she'll have to walk around to all four sides of the table. She'll have the security of being able to hold on to the table for balance but she'll also be spending a lot of time on her feet, getting more and more comfortable as she walks around it. I believe that a table like I just described accelerated my son's development in terms of learning how to walk. He actually took his first unassisted steps while playing with it.

It's really a great toy all-around, too... lots of colors and things she can manipulate which react by making sounds/music.

No matter what, just remember that she will eventually walk. And your reaction to those steps she took around thanksgiving was the exact same reaction that many of us have at these kinds of milestones. The first time my little boy got himself to roll over, he was surrounded by a circle of almost 10 people, all cheering him on... when he finally pulled it off, it was absolute pandemonium. You didn't do anything wrong!

Answer 2

The best thing to do is to stop trying to help, and stop anyone else who may be around from trying to help too. That doesn't mean don't engage with them or play with them but that they just don't need the distraction.

Also fixating on it can become a problem. Stop being there to catch them, they're probably picking up from a parent that falling down is bad. Make a quick joke of it if they fall down and they'll let you know if they're really hurt.

From the note that's added I'd say this child can walk but doesn't want to practice right now. At some point it will become more efficient for them to walk around than to crawl and they'll work it out soon enough.

Answer 3

Yes maybe she got scared by you guys but her determination to learn will push her to walk. When you see her trying to walk - hold her, stand her up in front of your legs and walk with her. It does take a lot of time to encourage a baby to walk. Try a walker.

One of my kids did not like the walker so i had to use a long stick with a small branch on the side that she used to hold on to as she walked.

Also beware of low tables like coffee tables. I have seen many baby accidents involving coffee tables.